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Old 11-08-2010, 06:36 PM   #1
Fast Gunn
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Exclamation Cooking Your Testicles

With all the real problems the world already has on the front burner, I didn't think the danger of having your testicles cooked was something to be even remotely concerned about, but maybe it is.

The journal for Fertility and Sterility did a study on how the heat from your laptop affects your sperm count and you may want to protect your Johnson before you're shooting blanks!

Bill Gates, are you listening?

http://www.businessinsider.com/is-yo...Insider+Select
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Old 11-08-2010, 08:17 PM   #2
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I thought a reciepe would ensue....
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Old 11-08-2010, 08:36 PM   #3
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Here ya go...
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Old 11-08-2010, 08:44 PM   #4
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Exclamation Horrific

Ouch!

The thought is painful enough just to imagine, but actual images of testicles in a pan and the thought of Hillary with a knife is plain horrific!

Bill Clinton can feel that pain!
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Old 11-09-2010, 07:11 AM   #5
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Default Cooking Testicles

Buy a Jaguar and put the heated seats on high and I doubt anything swims after an hour or so.
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Old 11-09-2010, 08:21 AM   #6
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If you use Ubuntu instead, your laptop wont be nearly as hot...also, you can use one of those lap desk tops.
You can also cook your leg you have it sitting in.... http://richardstep.com/2010/10/04/to...e-cure-for-10/
It is called toasted skin syndrome.
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Old 11-09-2010, 08:53 AM   #7
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I also read a study that found that disposable dipers cause a decreas in virility.

I have been shooting blanks for many years and I don't find anything bad about it. The bang is the same and the lady never knows unless you tell her. All of the fun and none of the worry.
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Old 11-09-2010, 09:24 AM   #8
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Geez, I am SOOOOOO happy that I don't have to worry about such things!!!
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Old 11-09-2010, 09:41 AM   #9
Capt. Lincoln F. Stern
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tiffany Cums View Post
If you use Ubuntu instead, your laptop wont be nearly as hot...also, you can use one of those lap desk tops.
You can also cook your leg you have it sitting in.... http://richardstep.com/2010/10/04/to...e-cure-for-10/
It is called toasted skin syndrome.
Tiffany? You use Ubuntu? Sweet!

Actually the best way to help cool a laptop down is spend the cash on an SSD drive (solid state drive) think of it like a huge memory card that replaces the hd.

No moving parts, uses less power, alot less heat.

Friend of mine did his laptop and got 45 minutes more run time,
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Old 11-09-2010, 09:49 AM   #10
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Cheap and secretive birth control. I see hobbyists scrambling for those laptops now, along with heated bucket seats, hot tubs, x-rays, tight undies, and bicycles. Biking, especially sport cycling, has also been linked to low sperm counts. The repeated shocks, pressure, and vibrations from the seat between your legs can kill your little swimmers.

Maybe I should offer that as a service. Get my mega-supersonic-warp-breaking-seismic-orgasm-220-volt vibrator out and apply it to a few shillelaghs and declare myself an infertility specialist. More fun than a vasectomy!
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Old 11-09-2010, 10:58 AM   #11
Fast Gunn
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Exclamation Old Irish Term

"shillelaghs"? I haven't heard that word in a long time.

That must be an old Irish term.

However, I prefer my shillelagh to remain fresh and certainly uncooked, thank you, very much.
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Old 11-09-2010, 11:03 AM   #12
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Then just let me spit polish your shillelagh, laddie. I'll make it a shiny cane, then clean as a whistle.
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Old 11-09-2010, 11:06 AM   #13
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Ooops. Double post.

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Old 11-09-2010, 11:45 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spirit13 View Post
Tiffany? You use Ubuntu? Sweet!
Of course! Providers are allowed their nerdiness too!
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Old 11-09-2010, 01:43 PM   #15
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