Mature Problems

[shortstroke35]

As a mature hobbyist, I prefer a mature provider. While mature is not always in age, it most times is. My question is what do the more mature providers do when menopause hits? I have gone through a wife and a girlfriend that when the "change" hit their libido plummeted. By the way both were under 50. I do know that the hormone swing starts long before the change so what do you girls do about that? Suffer through it or just fake it and go to work? I know that we men have ED and a host of other problems that we work on ( many times with the help of a wonderful sympathetic provider) but what about you girls?

[Fancyinheels]

Oh, goodness, I didn't even become a provider until I was 47! I am 55 now, and still a lusty Irish lass.

Hormones play a big part, yes, but a lot of the way a woman feels after menopause is psychological. She has to come to a new understanding with her body as it ages and learn to work around changes and difficulties. Most importantly, she has to put it completely out of mind that how many years she has trod the planet, or her ability to bear children, has anything to do with desire, sensuality, and her personal sexiness.

To help with dryness, lubes are manufactured in hundreds of varieties, flavored, cooling, warming, tingling, glow-in-the-dark, etc., etc.. Natural estrogen creams, supplements, and physician-prescribed medications can help ease the transition, too.

As long as there is enthusiasm, there is ALWAYS fun to be enjoyed.

[Solitaire]

At the risk of sounding crass, or harsh, or whatever negative emotion I'm thinking I may evoke with the next statement.... which I apologize for ahead of time...

1. Pay her for her time (or make the exchange otherwise equitable)
2. Allow her the same variety that I assume you are now enjoying

You will see a BIG change in her "hormones"

[shortstroke35]

Don't misunderstand, I am divorced and now have a wonderful SO and I hobby only very infrequently. But at a certain age the libido, desire for sex lessens and just seems to keep dropping. It is wonderful when it happens for both parties and is very enjoyed by both but it just lessens to the point of having no need or desire of sex. Intimacy is still there and kissing and cuddling but that seems to be enough.

[Solitaire]

You are right. I didnt really answer the question as it was asked... I projected. Sorry.

"I" made it all more equitable and "I" gave myself permission to enjoy variety.

There are aspects to these age/life changes that I strongly dislike, but can be managed... and libido problems have not been one of them.

[RocketCityClub]

Originally Posted by shortstroke35

..... My question is what do the more mature providers do when menopause hits? ..... so what do you girls do about that? Suffer through it or just fake it and go to work? I know that we men have ED and a host of other problems that we work on ( many times with the help of a wonderful sympathetic provider) but what about you girls?

There are things that suck about growing older, and some things I love! Myself I am over 40 and I am starting to hit menopause. I deal with crazy shifts in my moods, migraine headaches, night sweats and some other not so fun stuff.
I have noticed that it takes me longer to get turned on and in the mood, so as a suggestion to anyone who prefers cougars like me, take your time and get the longer appointment option. I am turned on by generous men and those who take the time to make me feel good. I prefer dates where we can go out and enjoy laughing and talking.
I would say that yes my desire has gone down some but it has just made me able to slow down and get to know my lovers on a deeper level. Therefore, encounters while less frequent are of a honest and more real kind.

[DallasRain]

I had a client that was amazed that I am 51 and still having regular peiods!
My gyno says I am not yet going thru menopause or even in early menopause.....she says enjoy it..lol

[Lea Madisson]

I am pass that stage in life and I am till going strong!!

Smooch!

Lea

[pyramider]

Age does not affect the taint ... ijs.

[DallasRain]

Originally Posted by pyramider

Age does not affect the taint ... ijs.

[SinsOfTheFlesh]

Menopause is a bit of a crap shoot for women. A loss of sex drive is pretty common after menopause. Some women though, get lucky and still have a strong sex drive after menopause. Some women even discover that their sex drive is even stronger after menopause.

Fortunately, there are now a number of options for women who want to continue to enjoy a healthy sex life. One of the most common causes of loss of sex drive in post menopausal women is vaginal dryness. After all, who wants to have sex when it hurts? There are now several prescriptions available that improve vaginal lubrication. Estrogen replacement therapy, medications like Replens and and Lovena.

Vaginal tissue can also thin and become more fragile after menopause, causing painful tearing. An oral medication called Osphena can thicken vaginal tissues, making them less likely to tear.

So, fortunately for women today, we do now have options that can help us continue to enjoy a healthy and satisfying sex life for as long as we want. Thank God for science!

[pyramider]

They still do not orgasm.

[gigi_gypsy]

Before menopause I was off the charts horny and after I am still horny, but probably at a more normal person's level - if that makes sense.

The biggest thing I've noticed is that I am not as wet (use to be soaking). But as FancyInHeels mentioned - there are lubes and I too look at lubes as a sex toy.

I did try Viagra and found that it made me even more sensitive than I am already am. It makes my orgasms much more intense.

Here is a study about Viagra and women: http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=124569

[rubytuesday]

I didn't start providing until my mid 50's, so pretty much over with menopause by then. But....I didn't want to suffer through the symptoms so went on hormone replacement for a few years. It's just not worth going through the hot flashes, night sweats, mood swings, and the other symptoms. Since I had a hysterectomy when I was in my early 40's, no periods to worry about. I found that the patch worked the best for me. After that, I started on a natural hormone therapy and stopped using the patch. I'm completely off any HRT now, but haven't noticed a diminished sex drive for me, but agree...it takes a bit more foreplay for me to get to that happy place.

[Guest110516]

To the OP,

Do your research, then, leave your libido and hers in her quite capable hands.