Just a thought

[Reincarnated]

Today they buried our Eccie friend Betzi. I had planned on going to the funeral but got off work to late to attend since the funeral was at Staff Edit....Forbidden Topic....Spacemtn and I was in South Austin at 5pm.

As I was in traffic I started reflecting upon her life. I met her a couple times at socials and said "hi" but never saw her BCD. I have heard so many nice things about her.

That started me wondering who else in our little group I have not bothered to take the time to get to know because they were not my "type" physically. Could they be someone very special in an non physical way? I am ashamed to admit I a guilty of quickly passing judgement on peoples looks only when I am trying to determine who to see at the socials.

I want to challenge all those of you who go to socials to find someone that you would never normally talk to except to say hi and spend some time getting to know them. You might find a real friend, a diamond in the rough. I know after hearing may wonderful stories about Betzi that I missed an opportunity to know a very sweet lady. I don't want to let that happen again and I hope you too will take a moment to get to know everyone there....

[chuckles]

A very nice thought.

[readysetgo12]

Class act as always Reincarnated.

[fun2come]

Not just our socials here, do it at every party, every event you go to, you'd be amazed !!!

THX Reincarnated, I know this is not an easy or natural thing to do for most people, but it can indeed lead to amazing friendships.

[jackdanielscowboy]

Reincarnated

I agree always good to expand circle. I am in a program that was forced to be in because of mistakes made. The good that has come out is made some new friends two that i would never have normally hung out with.

[silversurfer]

@Reincarnated:

Very nice thoughts about Betzi and life in general.

I'd like to share a few thoughts...

I met Betzi just a little more than two weeks ago. I had a wonderful time talking to her during the almost two hours that we spent together. Unfortunately, I did not learn of her passing until just this evening when I logged on to ECCIE thinking that I'd say hi, see how she was doing and ask her if we could get together again upon my return to Austin. Lo and behold, I saw that her profile had been deleted. I did a little bit of amateur detective work using the forum's search feature and eventually came upon the sad news of her passing.

I very much wanted to post my condolences to that thread, but saw that it was locked. So then I was thinking that I'd send a private message to Hunter Grace. (I will still do that sometime in the next few days as Betzi had shared some very nice thoughts about Hunter and a few other ladies which I'm sure she would enjoy hearing.)

Alas, I've found myself kind of oddly devastated tonight. I've been unable to sleep all night (this, with a 6am flight scheduled) and I've said to myself at least a dozen times, "Wow, I just saw this person two weeks ago. How can she really be gone?" After a bit more tossing and turning, I decided to get up and get back on the forums and that's when I saw your post from a bit earlier in the day. So I guess this is my chance to say a couple of things.

I won't pretend that I knew Betzi any better than one could during a two hour meeting, so please don't anyone take my words that way. There's no question that many others on this board knew Betzi much better than I ever could... so this isn't one of "those" posts. But we did talk for the majority of our time together and, in retrospect, she seemed rather reflective on her life when we met (to be fair, we were both in a reflective mood). I won't betray any private details here in the forum out of respect for Betzi, but suffice it to say that we talked about a variety of topics: everything from family and health issues to where we each were on the days of 9/11 and the Boston Marathon bombing, etc... She told me about her job before getting into the "hobby," talked about what she called "the scariest thing to ever happen to her" during her time in the hobby and mentioned to me a couple of unkind things that had been said to or about her by a couple of gentlemen in reviews, which made me kind of sad.

But she also had a lot of wonderful things to say about the hobby, and even more wonderful things to say about Hunter Grace and a few other ladies. I'm re-entering the hobby after an extended absence (health issues) and had asked her for the 411 on a few other ladies. She spoke more glowingly of some people over others, but didn't have a negative thing to say about anyone that I asked about.

As I mentioned, we each talked about our health a little bit. I told her about my issues with cancer and how it sort of forced me out of the hobby for awhile. I think she took pity on me and said three or four times that she was going to make it her mission to get me back into the hobby and offered to be my "wingman" as far as getting on P411 and meeting some other ladies. I laughed each time she said that, but I thought that was really sweet of her and I will always think fondly of her for that. She had also agreed to come to my place for our initial meeting (versus me going to her) because of my comfort level, which was something else that I appreciated more than she knew.

I genuinely enjoyed my time with her and appreciate the fact that I was able to forge a friendship, however short, with her. I'm not a handsome guy and I do not do "small talk" very well and, as a result, I'm slow to make friends with many people (which kind of speaks to your point about taking the time to get to know more people). The fact that I considered Betzi a friend after such a short amount of time is a testament to what a fine lady she was. (As I mentioned, when I discovered that she had passed, I was literally in the act of trying to reach out to her to find out when I might be able to see her again... making that moment even more sad for me.)

Anyway, that's kind of my story. Hopefully I have not offended anyone here with anything I've said, or shared any details that violate the TOS of this board. But I did want to share those thoughts.

Thanks again for the very nice post, Reincarnated.

[Mokoa]

Originally Posted by Reincarnated

...I want to challenge all those of you who go to socials to find someone that you would never normally talk to except to say hi and spend some time getting to know them. You might find a real friend, a diamond in the rough. I know after hearing may wonderful stories about Betzi that I missed an opportunity to know a very sweet lady. I don't want to let that happen again and I hope you too will take a moment to get to know everyone there....

I wound up meeting a number of very nice and interesting people that way. You will never know unless you try.

My deepest sympathy for Betzi. She will be missed.

Great thread.

[Sir Hardin Thicke]

Great observation Reincarnated.

[cinnamonshark]

I only found out about Betzi today. I never got the opportunity to meet her, but I will share my condolences and bow my head in a moment of silence.