Let me help you

[boardman]

Fucktards, are you tired of going to the pound to adopt a friend just to get them home and find out they have a bad attitude?

Hooktards, how many times have you taken a cute little kitten off of your friends hands then find out they really wanted to get rid of her because she is a neurotic little curtain climber? Maybe you picked up a stray tomcat off of the street and brought him home only to find out a week later he's been pissing in your stripper heels.

Have no fear, I am here to help.

I'm putting together a website that will help guys and girls alike in the art of adopting the cat that is just right for them.

Through my blogs and articles I will show you how to pick out the kind of pet that will curl up in the laundry basket and purr on command. I will teach you how to spot a disfunctional non house trained cat and even tell you the secrets of getting a feline to properly use the litter box every time. (Puking and hairballs don't apply)

When you subscribe to my site you will have access to information compiled by myself and other concerned cat lovers who just want to help those of you that don't have a fucking clue as to what you are doing when it comes to cats.

We don't offer cat training services but rather guided self help in the art of choosing the purrfect pet.

I will soon welcome you to:

The boardman experience!


Details, pricing and website link will be provided soon.

[TexasGator]

If there were ever a reason to bring back the "Hall of Fame" thread, this is it!

[Jusanotherdude]

I'm reading and reading..... and I can't help but feel like I should be expecting the ..... "But wait!!! There's MORE!" Sales pitch......

Tony Robbins ain't got shit on the SHMB's ThreAD Cat!!

JaD

[texasjohn1965]

My SO loves cats....... Stir fried.

[Eccie Addict]

[Abigail (Source of JOY)]

I think I just hacked up a fur ball laughing so hard!!!


Can I get this in the "As Seen On TV" aisle at Walgreens?

[notanewbie]

Oh SNAP!

I bow to the cat.....can I get a hook up?

[Wakeup]

Double entendres win...

[Syncial]

If you follow Boardman's advise and still do not want the cat, please donate to my restaurant:



We will be sure to make good use of em.


Hell, one lunch entre free with first cat donation.

[internet_inventor2]

Will you also provide videos and testimonials from cats that have been taken home ?

Boardman is this copyright infringement ?

You need a name, the boardmanchronicles or better yet, the boardmanexpirence . Ijs what a great idea.

[boardman]

Copyright? What??? Has someone already thought of this?

Do I need to protect my intellectual property? Where's Sofi...Damn, I almost said it!

Does the prime directive apply to those who have chosen another career path?

Cats being the creatures they are, aren't normally open to testimonials but I'll see what I can do.

[Guest032414-2]

Any tips on toilet training a cat? Mine seems to have issues with the blue cleaning tablets we use...

[pyramider]

[aznlvr11]

Originally Posted by Syncial

If you follow Boardman's advise and still do not want the cat, please donate to my restaurant:


We will be sure to make good use of em.


Hell, one lunch entre free with first cat donation.

Nice one, Syn. Nothing like some cashew chicken. LMFAO! Mao.....

[mikkifine]

LOL!

Originally Posted by Syncial

If you follow Boardman's advise and still do not want the cat, please donate to my restaurant:



We will be sure to make good use of em.


Hell, one lunch entre free with first cat donation.