Living with HSV2

[Shagem6967]

I don't hobby much anymore as I got a divorce and am looking for more. I recently met a gal that is really great. We are at that point where we will be having sex soon and she tells me her late husband gave her HSV2. She has it under control but warned me that there was a risk. We deal with sex here and I know there are those in medical as well...how can you protect yourself in a committed relationship to avoid transmission? Can you? Anyone have any experience? I am not trying to out anyone or even myself. I am clean and would like to stay that way.

[JRLawrence]

Originally Posted by Shagem6967

I don't hobby much anymore as I got a divorce and am looking for more. I recently met a gal that is really great. We are at that point where we will be having sex soon and she tells me her late husband gave her HSV2. She has it under control but warned me that there was a risk. We deal with sex here and I know there are those in medical as well...how can you protect yourself in a committed relationship to avoid transmission? Can you? Anyone have any experience? I am not trying to out anyone or even myself. I am clean and would like to stay that way.

"How Is Herpes Simplex Treated?

Although there is no cure for herpes, treatments can relieve the symptoms. Medication can decrease the pain related to an outbreak and can shorten healing time. They can also decrease the total number of outbreaks. Drugs including Famvir, Zovirax, and Valtrex are among the drugs used to treat the symptoms of herpes. Warm baths may relieve the pain associated with genital sores."

"How Painful Is Herpes Simplex?

Some people experience very mild genital herpes symptoms or no symptoms at all. Frequently, people infected with the virus don't even know they have it. However, when it causes symptoms, it can be described as extremely painful. This is especially true for the first outbreak, which is often the worst. Outbreaks are described as aches or pains in or around the genital area or burning, pain, or difficulty urinating. Some people experience discharge from the vagina or penis.

Oral herpes lesions (cold sores) usually cause tingling and burning just prior to the breakout of the blisters. The blisters themselves can also be painful.

Good Luck. There is a lot of medical information on the net. This is a big concern for everyone. But, it is better to search the medical sites than rely on information from those who may know little about the subject.

[Tiny]

I was going out with someone and after the second date and oral sex (on me) she broke down crying and told me she had herpes. I started laughing, said so what, doesn't everybody have it (i.e. HSV-1)? Then I never called her again. The reason I never called her though was actually because I was grossed out when she kissed me after the act and spat cum into my mouth. Gross!

Prior to making the decision not to see her again, I took a look at the literature. I definitely would have felt comfortable dating her if we were going to religiously use condoms, avoid sex during outbreaks, and if she were taking suppressive therapy. I remember the chances of getting herpes if you do this are considerably less than getting her pregnant while using condoms. Actually I would have been comfortable just using condoms correctly and avoiding sex during outbreaks, without the drugs.

That said, you can get herpes while using condoms. It would be a good idea to find out whether she's having outbreaks in places where a condom might not protect you. If that's the case or if you really, really like bareback sex then you've got some thinking to do.

[FireKitten]

I have an immediate but mildly remote family member that has HSV 2. I read extensively on the subject and have made note of their progression over the last 2+ years.

The risks, the farther away from the initial diagnosis, tend to get lower, as the breakouts usually become less, and medication can be quite effective. Condoms are important protection, but not failsafe. If you are considering pregnancy, there are additional and significant risks about childbirth.

But bottom line, is that HSV 2 can be passed to another person when there are no visible symptoms of an outbreak---orally to the secondary person(yes, not just HSV 1)from the genitals, or via genital contact of both, or possible immediate exposure to an item that has been in contact with their bodily fluids, including from the mouth.

Herpes tagged disorders are a large, complex division of virus strains that can live in any mucus membrane, (and often felt as a body wide flare), and on skin, and not always dormant in all quiet cycles, even though it may appear to be.

If you are considering making a LTR work, I'd talk to a health care provider about the risks in general, and risk for you, at your health and immunity level personally, and hers. Preferably a sexual health professional who deals with this extensively.