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faith28 · 09-30-2010, 10:24 AM

I had a guy this morning contact me for an appointment gave me his handle and P411 ID. Great I thought... checked out his okays and nothing since 2008. I did request a recent provider reference. He then sends me a email conversation with a well know provider. I contacted her and she said NO I have not seen him. I send him back a email and said have you seen her? He then replies with a very nasty email tell me he does not want to see me and I have exhausted him with the screening process. Also stated for me NOT to contact him again. Then went ahead and sent me 6 emails of converstaions with providers and ends it with...

There. Are all of the references and all of the correspondence proff enough for you? I hope so. But I will not be seeing you under any circumstances.

I simply replied...Please do not contact me again and I will not contact you. It was a simple misunderstanding obviously.

I do not think sending a converstion with another provideris First is excepitable and second does not prove as a reference. If this guy is telling me not to contact his references what does he have to hide????

What do you guys and girls think???

nascar88888 · 09-30-2010, 10:33 AM

Faith I agree 100% with you

spacecadet · 09-30-2010, 10:36 AM

Safety First!

GabrielaSweetheart · 09-30-2010, 10:40 AM

If they were serious about meeting, they wouldnt have had a problem being screened. the serious guys out there understand how this goes.

offshoredrilling · 09-30-2010, 10:51 AM

I have not seen any provider from this board in some time now. And so i would be in the same boat as he. A old newbie. I do not see why one would get mad at you for this. I know it is hard to get started. And it should be just as hard to restart. Just the way it is.

Could it be that he has been with some of the ones on P411. In a time fram you feel ok with. And p411 is not up to date? If so I would have you know that. Ok It has 2008 but I have been with her last month, This other one the month before, etc.

I try to keep on the good side of the many that would not see me when I first got on ASPD and here. Why burn a bridge. For some day I may want to resee ones that I have not been with in some time now. And then use that to see ones that would not before.{see edit}

Many very the amount they do this hobby. If you back out, as I have done you can not just jump back in. You need to go where you have been before, or start over all together.

edit: and so I do need some one I have been with before see anger form me to one I want to see. For then they may not want to see me again. And that would not be good. For I would like to see them again just for being who there are. Or as a tool to start over.

mmmm mushy but also just the way it is.

Maximum4 · 09-30-2010, 11:42 AM

I did not find it very hard to start up things and found getting an appointment with those that required references pretty easily. The identity proof in the beginning wasn't that big a deal and once you have a good reference, you're able to use that reference. I found that if I was polite and sounded sane, I got an appointment. I can't understand where this guy was coming from and sounds like a really weird exchange. E-mails with a provider as proof? I would just give the provider's e-mail address and go from there. E-mails with details....that seems like a dumb idea to pass around in the first place.

guyincognito · 09-30-2010, 12:18 PM

As a true newbie let me add the following. When I decide to take the plunge and meet with a provider, I want the screening process to make that lady as comfortable as humanly possible. Part of that process is to ensure that a good time is had and having ANY doubt about anybody will lead to some concern.

So Faith, you did the right thing in my book because I would not want to half-ass a screening process or deal with outdated information.

Guy

guest111111 · 09-30-2010, 12:43 PM

block him and move on dear... you dont deserve that...

m2244 · 09-30-2010, 02:13 PM

faith,
what i think is that he is a d bag....sorry for that guys but seriously, then men out here that appreciate this and us and safety are the ones that send an email first thing with recent providers and are very cool about it....the good ones are the ones that understand this and appreciate it because they too want to keep safe. I have gotten to the point that if they send me non legit providers or dont send references at all....i delete it a move it....its ridiculas how many places we write this info and it still is not followed. I have heard many great things about you and this is quite honestly this guys BIGGGG loss. So don't worry about it hun, you are great and also a great reference for me as well .......so be safe and happy providing and the ones that make it unhappy.....move on and forget it...

Laker · 09-30-2010, 02:20 PM

Thanks Faith, I agree, Safety First... !!

wlhrgfan · 09-30-2010, 02:43 PM

I don't think copies of e-mail conversations is proof of anything...I could send you copies of emails written between Me and Ghandi, Elvis and the Loch ness monster...But it proves what? That I have a good imagination.

Nothing beats a good phone call provider to provider with a quick verify I guess? You can fake emails like you can fake anything on the internet..It's getting like e banking...trust in some basic human interaction even if its a simple voicemail or 60 sec phone conversation

Also on a side note to this whole story even if a conversation via email occured, I don't think it's cool to send it along to other people outside the original client provider parameters. To me it is very similar to an attorney client relationship and should be treated as such. It's like anything else in this world between professionals that info/dialogue should NOT be shared to any outside parties given the hobbies nature and need for privacy. Common sense as to basic courtesy of privacy to me but I guess it's 2 cents that apparently is valued differently by people.

Das Ubersoldat · 09-30-2010, 04:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wlhrgfan

I could send you copies of emails written between Me and Ghandi, Elvis and the Loch ness monster...

Wait, you know Nessie too?

wlhrgfan · 09-30-2010, 05:39 PM

Yeah me and Napoleon Dynamite are members or the friends for Nessie foundation...along with gandalf and Merlin of course

faith28 · 10-01-2010, 09:29 AM

Thank You Everyone for your Honest Opinions
XO Faith

HlavinKitheri · 10-01-2010, 11:47 AM

Likewise I would not trust an email from a provider reference, even if it comes direct and not forwarded, even if you know the provider and are sure it's her address. I can send you an email that appears to come from any address. It isn't even hard.