[quote=WTF;552022]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Laurentius
. As I deal with them as whole people and see the fee more as facilitating a lifestyle that allows us to be together than as payment for service; quote]
Really, they are whole people? 
As to your second point....please let me know when you decide to quit the payment for service part and try and continue with the lifestyle/togetherness part and let me know how that turns out.  |
It seems I should expand on these points to make them better understood. I didn't explain mine well enough.
Let me address the payment aspect first.
Pretend that provider X is a skilled physician's assistant. Rather than doing that, she decides to be a provider.
Now, if she weren't being paid as a provider, she'd have to go back to being a PA so she could keep a roof over her head.
So the fact she is paid facilitates a lifestyle wherein she has the capacity to spend time with me. Otherwise, she'd be too busy working as a PA to be able to see me.
The payment is an indispensible aspect of the lifestyle, so why would I skip it?
In addition, in civie life, in exchange for sex a woman typically wants things outside of money. Things like a relationship, a commitment, undying devotion and stuff.
A provider foregoes the rights she would normally have as a civie to try to turn me into her boyfriend, etc. Instead, she accepts a fee.
While I will admit to some OTC time with some ladies; I have never accepted OTC sex time. And the reason is because sex sans compensation is a prelude to requirements for relationship, commitment, etc. in most cases.
I already know how sex sans compensation works. It's a clear sign that somebody is going to be hurt emotionally one way or another. So why would I go there?
Now to address the whole people comment.
Everybody is a whole person by definition.
But when you deal with the guy at the deli, the cashier at the supermarket or a carpenter you bring in for home improvements; you generally engage only a small part of who and what they are. Basically, you engage them primarily in the function that is economically valuable to you.
As a low volume hobbyist, I have the luxury of engaging providers outside of the function that is economically valuable to me. Of course, sex time is compensated. As noted earlier, that's necessary. But outside of that, I tend not to deal with providers solely in their economically useful role. (I only engage providers where such dealings are mutually beneficial.) Over time I've done everything from handling their court cases (I don't typically work in that role, but sometimes I do) to assisting with putting together materials for a class one planned to teach.
The point is that, when I have hopped into bed with a lady I've engaged in that way, there is really no doubt in her mind that I value her, personally and uniquely yet without even a hint of possessiveness.
So perhaps instead of saying I deal with them as whole people; a better way of saying it would be that the fact I value them personally and uniquely is evident.
Obviously, the flip side of this is I see very few providers. And yes, the sexual engagement is definitely qualitatively different than with providers that I have incidentally booked for a once-off one-hour bcd session.
I Know You're Already Having Great Sex But...
Agreed!
Women, insecure with their bodies! Say it ain't so atl. Next you'll tell us men are insecure with their pecker size!
Bold words in this realm!
But what you might want to ponder is that not 99% of sex is between the ears for everyone. It might be for you and it might be for me but don't you think that is a pretty broad statement to hold up for everyone? 
