What is a Woman?

[boardman]

Originally Posted by Zoi

Okay...all that having been said. Just What do you men want in a WOMAN, we are opning the lines here. No holds barred.

You asked for it:
3' tall
flat head-so I have a place to put my drink
no teeth
swallows
and her daddy owns a liquor store.

[ThatManFromTexas]

Originally Posted by Zoi

Okay...all that having been said. Just What do you men want in a WOMAN, we are opning the lines here. No holds barred.

A Perfect Woman says:

1. Are you sure you've had enough to drink?
2. Shouldn't you be down at the bar with your buddies?
3. That was a great fart...do another one.
4. I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.
5. You're so sexy when you're hung over.
6. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.
7. Let's subscribe to Hustler.
8. Say, lets go to the mall so you can check out other women's asses.
9. I'll be out painting the house.
10. I love it when you play golf on Sunday's...I wish you had time to play on Saturday too.
11. Honey... our new neighbors wife is sunbathing topless again...come see.
12. No, No, I can take the car to get the oil changed.
13. Your mother is wayyy better than mine.
14. Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentines thing and buy new clubs.
15. I understand fully...our anniversary comes every year...you go hunting with your buddies..it's a great stress reliever.
16. Oh come on, what do ya say we get a porno movie, a six pack and invite one of my girlfriends over for a threesome.
17. Oh no, not the mall again...let's go to a strip club.
18. Listen, I make enough money for the both of us, why don't you retire and get that nagging handicap down to 7 or 8.
19. I'll swallow it all, I love the taste.
20. I'm bored, let's shave my pubes.
21. Would you like to watch me go down on my girlfriend?
22. I know it's tighter back there, but could you please try again?
23. If I don't get to blow you soon, I swear I'm gonna bust.
24. I signed up for yoga so that I can get my ankles behind my head , just for you.

[Alpha_Male]

Boardman: Joke is: 3' tall, no teeth, flat head to put your beer down and big ears to hold onto. Swallows, Liquor stores heiress are attributes not physical features.

[Porscheboy8888]

Cats are just tiny women in little fur coats!

[pyro]

good one sir...

[Guest091710]

Originally Posted by ThatManFromTexas

A Perfect Woman says:

1. Are you sure you've had enough to drink?
2. Shouldn't you be down at the bar with your buddies?
3. That was a great fart...do another one.
4. I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.
5. You're so sexy when you're hung over.
6. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.
7. Let's subscribe to Hustler.
8. Say, lets go to the mall so you can check out other women's asses.
9. I'll be out painting the house.
10. I love it when you play golf on Sunday's...I wish you had time to play on Saturday too.
11. Honey... our new neighbors wife is sunbathing topless again...come see.
12. No, No, I can take the car to get the oil changed.
13. Your mother is wayyy better than mine.
14. Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentines thing and buy new clubs.
15. I understand fully...our anniversary comes every year...you go hunting with your buddies..it's a great stress reliever.
16. Oh come on, what do ya say we get a porno movie, a six pack and invite one of my girlfriends over for a threesome.
17. Oh no, not the mall again...let's go to a strip club.
18. Listen, I make enough money for the both of us, why don't you retire and get that nagging handicap down to 7 or 8.
19. I'll swallow it all, I love the taste.
20. I'm bored, let's shave my pubes.
21. Would you like to watch me go down on my girlfriend?
22. I know it's tighter back there, but could you please try again?
23. If I don't get to blow you soon, I swear I'm gonna bust.
24. I signed up for yoga so that I can get my ankles behind my head , just for you.

The perfect woman would ONLY say Yes Sir, lol

[CivilBarrister]

Originally Posted by subcilla

The perfect woman would ONLY say Yes Sir, lol

AGREED!

There was an old Robert Redford movie "Jeremiah Johnson" and a scene where Redford is teaching his new Indian wife to speak English. He taught her the word "Yes" which she responded to fir every question. The he said "Woman that is all you need to know"

[ThatManFromTexas]

Originally Posted by subcilla

The perfect woman would ONLY say Yes Sir, lol

Don't talk with your mouth full....

[Zoi]

Originally Posted by boardman

You asked for it:
3' tall
flat head-so I have a place to put my drink
no teeth
swallows
and her daddy owns a liquor store.

Okay...here goes my attempt at a Joke on eccie.

Why do men get smarter during sex?


Because they are plugged into a genius....

[Zoi]

Originally Posted by ThatManFromTexas

A Perfect Woman says:

1. Are you sure you've had enough to drink?
2. Shouldn't you be down at the bar with your buddies?
3. That was a great fart...do another one.
4. I've decided to stop wearing clothes around the house.
5. You're so sexy when you're hung over.
6. I'd rather watch football and drink beer with you than go shopping.
7. Let's subscribe to Hustler.
8. Say, lets go to the mall so you can check out other women's asses.
9. I'll be out painting the house.
10. I love it when you play golf on Sunday's...I wish you had time to play on Saturday too.
11. Honey... our new neighbors wife is sunbathing topless again...come see.
12. No, No, I can take the car to get the oil changed.
13. Your mother is wayyy better than mine.
14. Do me a favor, forget the stupid Valentines thing and buy new clubs.
15. I understand fully...our anniversary comes every year...you go hunting with your buddies..it's a great stress reliever.
16. Oh come on, what do ya say we get a porno movie, a six pack and invite one of my girlfriends over for a threesome.
17. Oh no, not the mall again...let's go to a strip club.
18. Listen, I make enough money for the both of us, why don't you retire and get that nagging handicap down to 7 or 8.
19. I'll swallow it all, I love the taste.
20. I'm bored, let's shave my pubes.
21. Would you like to watch me go down on my girlfriend?
22. I know it's tighter back there, but could you please try again?
23. If I don't get to blow you soon, I swear I'm gonna bust.
24. I signed up for yoga so that I can get my ankles behind my head , just for you.

Is that all?