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06-06-2010, 03:59 PM
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#1
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 9598
Join Date: Jan 19, 2010
Location: Memphis
Posts: 510
My ECCIE Reviews
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Don't think I'm gross, but.....
Have any of you ever had a high colonic? I just lost some weight and I'm eating a lot healthier and I'm wondering if this would be a good way to kick start my new healthier lifestyle. I have a friend that swears by it, but she is one of those weird hippie people who doesn't shave, use deodorant, or immunize her kids.
"Don't judge me!" (Jack Black - Tropic Thunder).
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06-06-2010, 04:01 PM
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#2
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 9598
Join Date: Jan 19, 2010
Location: Memphis
Posts: 510
My ECCIE Reviews
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I just submitted my post and realized it's kinda funny next to the avatar pic of my ass!! lmao!
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06-06-2010, 04:53 PM
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#3
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 22574
Join Date: Apr 14, 2010
Location: oh
Posts: 4
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EXERCISE HONEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 6months to keep it off.
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06-06-2010, 08:05 PM
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#4
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Lifetime Premium Access
Join Date: Jan 31, 2010
Location: West Texas
Posts: 872
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Okay, I can see no one is going to voluteer to help, so I'll do it. Layback and enjoy. Ignore the clothes pin on my nose.
Afterwards, I'll have to make sure it's all okay, so be prepared for another anal sensation.
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06-07-2010, 06:35 AM
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#5
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Account Disabled
User ID: 5290
Join Date: Jan 4, 2010
Location: Chickasha
Posts: 6,111
My ECCIE Reviews
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I actually am not sure what you are asking....but yeah, your post with your new avator...
I have taken one of the prepackaged herbal colon cleanses you get at the drugstore. I guess about once a year I feel the need to use it. Also, I use white tea in my daily diet and it helps to keep everything running smooth. I just keep the box next to the microwave..drink a cup as often as I can.
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06-07-2010, 08:39 AM
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#6
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HELL's bell ringer!!
User ID: 3067
Join Date: Dec 27, 2009
Location: Based in Missouri AND coming to play in your town soon!!!
Posts: 70,822
My ECCIE Reviews
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mmmmmmmmmmmmmm I know that ass very well{and it is so cute}!!!!!!!!!!
what is a high colonic????
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06-07-2010, 11:18 AM
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#7
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Lifetime Premium Access
Join Date: Jan 5, 2010
Location: Heart Attack & Vine
Posts: 519
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A high colonic is large volume/repeated enemas intended to clean, ahem, everything out of the colon. The idea is that it cleans out accumulated toxins, etc. that can lead to poor health. The originator of this notion in the U.S. was Dr. John Harvey Kellogg, inventor of the corn flake. He strongly believed in a problem called autointoxication, in which evil humors from a dirty colon enter the bloodstream and lead to all manner of ailments. T.C. Boyle wrote a novel about him called The Road to Wellville that was subsequently made into a movie starring Anthony Hopkins as the good doctor.
Autointoxication has since been found not to exist as a disease entity, but Dr. Kellogg's intellectual heirs are alive and well.
High colonics can induce a feeling of well being and euphoria because they stimulate the release of endorphins (naturally produced opiods). They don't provide any actual health benefit, though. If you want to do it to feel good, go right ahead--it isn't harmful if done properly. But as an investment in good health, a decent pair of running shoes will do more for you.
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06-07-2010, 12:44 PM
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#8
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Dec 26, 2009
Location: calif
Posts: 3,187
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Word!
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06-07-2010, 05:49 PM
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#9
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 9598
Join Date: Jan 19, 2010
Location: Memphis
Posts: 510
My ECCIE Reviews
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I got a lot of pm's......everything from "it's a lot of hype" to "it is euphoric!"
So, I made a couples appt for me and the hubby to get a high colonic, followed by a massage.
He only knows about the massage
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06-08-2010, 12:54 AM
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#10
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Account Disabled
User ID: 12218
Join Date: Feb 1, 2010
Location: Houston
Posts: 149
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let me know how it goes
I might be interested
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06-08-2010, 12:57 AM
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#11
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Professional Tush Hog.
Join Date: Mar 27, 2009
Location: Here and there.
Posts: 8,969
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06-08-2010, 05:20 AM
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#12
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Lifetime Premium Access
Join Date: Sep 5, 2009
Location: SW Arkansas NE Texas
Posts: 754
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I think it is similar to the experience below.
Dave Barry's colonoscopy journal:
I called my friend Andy Sable, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy. A few days later, in his office, Andy showed me a color diagram of the colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Minneapolis . Then Andy explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner. I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my brain was shrieking, quote, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR BEHIND!'
I left Andy's office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,'which comes in a box larg e enough to hold a microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of America 's enemies.
I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous. Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; all I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavor. Then, in the evening, I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-liter plastic jug, and then you fill it with lukewarm water. (For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a liter is about 32 gallons.) Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon.
The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose watery bowel movement may result.' This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground.
MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but: Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another liter of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.
After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep. The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I spurt on Andy?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.
At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the heck the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadist perverts, the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked.
Then a nurse named Eddie put a little needle in a vein in my left hand. Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Eddie was very good, and I was already lying down. Eddie also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep. At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.
When everything was ready, Eddie wheeled me into the procedure room, where Andy was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew Andy had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point. Andy had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand. There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by Abba. I remarked to Andy that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' has to be the least appropriate.
'You want me to turn it up?' said Andy, from somewhere behind me.
'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time, the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.
I have no idea. Really. I slept through it. One moment, Abba was shrieking 'Dancing Queen! Feel the beat from the tambourine' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood. Andy was looking down at me and asking me how I felt. I felt excellent. I felt even more excellent when Andy told me that it was all over, and that my colon had passed with flying colors. I have never been prouder of an internal organ.
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06-08-2010, 07:58 AM
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#13
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Thank God it's Firday!
Join Date: Dec 12, 2009
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 2,698
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It's pure superstition.
Shit happens. What's in your colon will flow out in the natural course of events. A fresh supply will flow in from the top and replace what's gone. A "quick flush" won't do anything particularly useful.
I would say it's new age bullshit, but really it's 19th century bullshit.
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06-08-2010, 10:44 AM
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#14
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Jan 26, 2010
Location: Fort Worth
Posts: 107
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I have suggested a high colonic, a field transport pack and a 50 mile forced march to several assholes in my life...I am pretty sure none of them had a such a cute rear end...but it always seemed to work!
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06-10-2010, 12:01 AM
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#15
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Pending Age Verification
User ID: 7867
Join Date: Jan 12, 2010
Location: Lone Star State
Posts: 6,013
My ECCIE Reviews
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I thought you need a rx from a doctor to have it done...am I wrong?
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