Quote:
Originally Posted by burkalini
This has happened to me repeatedly. You meet a new in the business provider and they tell you they are doing it to get them thru some bill issues or the famous school line. You see them a few times and eventually the original issue go away. They just seem to get sucked in. They just can't or don't want to get out of the business. Now don't get me wrong I'm not looking down on them as I think it's got to be a tough business to do year after year. I just wionder what happened to all the original asparations they have. I wonder how many providers quit the business after they have been in the business for a year. Any thoughts?
|
Unfortunately, MANY providers do NOT have a business plan. And they need to. When I got started I knew I wanted to buy a house and invest, but that was how I was raised, and I thank God that I have loving parents who don't necessarily agree with what I do but who have helped me invest wisely and know that this isn't a job for everyone. Admittingly, I'd be the first to say that the money does suck you in. ( no pun intended haha). You get used to making all this money and you feel more prostituted when you 'go back' to a regular job making much less. I feel like more 'broke' even charging 60 bucks an hour for personal training versus 300 for an hour of 'erotic exercise'
But that being said, it's important for a provider to take TIME OFF if she feels she's getting burned out or getting bitter and jaded. The last thing you need to be in this business is...jaded or bitter. And it happens all the time. The psychological and spiritual ramifications of being in the business a long time can be devastating and crippling. Therapy can be helpful and so can talking and connecting with other providers as well as clients for perspectives on the industry and its repercussions. I took a long time off from working so I could spend time travelling, regrouping mentally, and decorating and taking pride in my home. I needed that time to myself to be able to get back to business properly.
That being said, I do think that sometimes it comes across as condescending when someone asks ' why have you been doing this so long' or has no respect for a provider who actually loves what she does enough to do it for a long time like ANY other profession. If it was that bad, I certainly wouldn't have lasted as long as I did, and I enjoy my lifestyle working as both a trainer and a provider. Being a trainer gives me a much-needed break so my life isn't revolving just around being an escort. But I also see nothing wrong with a woman who makes it her life's calling, as some were simply born to do it if they enjoy it that much. Who are we to say that it isn't a perfectly valid profession worthy of respect as much as anything else, especially if a woman runs her business as she should, paying taxes, saving for her retirement, and having good credit as a result? Or helping her family, her children, her friends?
Until we as a society see that being an escort is worthy of respect like any other ( and it won't happen, attitudes die hard when it comes to the sex industry, although as time moves forward I'm happy to see that more adults ARE more open-minded towards the industry itself, though as escorts, for whatever reason, we fall at the very bottom of the rung after strippers and porn stars) the attitude that we're not doing something that merits a long-term stint in it is simply not going to be valued like other professions.
Time and time again I've tried to tell my friends to run their business like any other. That means PAYING taxes and saving up so that you have something to show for your work and not just fancy clothes or shoes if you're going to do it for a long period of time. Set goals. Take time off. Always have a good attitude. I have two college degrees and neither of them came to use as an escort, I majored in what I did because I loved the subjects, not the practicality of it, unless I wanted to be a librarian or a teacher ( and I was set to get my teaching credentials til I discovered I had no patience with teaching and I'd rather teach horizontal skills). Getting certified to train was one of the best things I did for myself as well.
But I definitely think there's condescending attitudes, whether they are intentional or not, for those who CHOOSE to be in the business a long time. Not all providers are 'trapped' in the cycle and not all of them 'have to do it'. Maybe some just enjoy it and are meant to do it, and not JUST for the money.
