CAPITALISM EXPLAINED

[waverunner234]

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.
A FRENCH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
A BRITISH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. Both are mad.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You break for lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION:
You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.
A HINDU CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You worship them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported the numbers

AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Islands Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release.
The public buys your bullshit.

[Guest040616]

Originally Posted by waverunner234

The public buys your bullshit.

GW would like to personally welcome you to his "BS" Ranch in Crawford, Texas!

[TexanAtPlay]

Originally Posted by bigtex

GW would like to personally welcome you to his "BS" Ranch in Crawford, Texas!

Aww, if only! I may have thought he was a Bilderberger and secretly wanting to sell we the people into the slavery of the one-world-government and didn't agree with those Democratic policy initiatives (He was a better Democrat than Republican in office, you see) he made, but if you want someone to take in a ball game with or to enjoy dogs and beer....he's the guy! It would be like going to a strip club with Bill Clinton, he'd be a load of fun to hang out with there!

Besides, rumors about that he no longer is in possession of the ranch, nobody really knows for sure. Or is at least trying to unload it...

AND at 1500 or so acres....pretty puny for a TEXAS ranch. I've seen it referred to as a "ranchette". Because in Texas anything worth doing, we do BIG.

[IIFFOFRDB]

A Socialist corporation:
They would kill them and eat them. Then starve over the winter.
A Texas Republican corporation:
Breed them and sell them to a socialist corporation and make a bunch of money.
A Liberal in Austin corporation:
Pay for the meat at HEB with their Lone Star card and laugh at us.

[DFW5Traveler]

That last model actually looks more like Globalist Capitalism, of which both party politicians are very familiar with. It reminds me of things like the repeal of Glass-Steagall (Gramm–Leach–Bliley), Sarbanes Oxley, NAFTA and companies like GE who ship jobs to China for cheap labor and then claim a tax-loophole because the jobs are green.