What has this hobby/lifestyle taught you?

[Shayla]

Searched through vaguely and didn't find a related topic so hopefully there will be some comments.
Anyway, moving on to the subject:
What has this hobby or lifestyle taught you? Gentlemen, have you gained more confidence talking to women or people in general? Have your social skills improve? Positive and negative experiences taught you anything?
Ladies, how has this affected your self-confidence? What have you learned about men in general? How did this affect your more "personal" life?
Most importantly, what have you learned about yourself and others?
You guys can embellish more, just a couple questions that came off the top of my head.

[petiteassman]

taught me to enjoy each day and those rare experiences that create memories of a lifetime. on that subject since you are posting in wny section are you planning a visit here. please say yes. guys recently a thread was started on national board about the most beautiful faces on providers and a gentleman pointed out shayla. i could not agree more. if you check out her showcase there are many great face pics and i find her amongst the most beautiful women i have ever seen in or out of this industry. perhaps if enough guys request she will make a visit to our area. i would give 10 yrs of my life to have that woman one time.

[JONBALLS]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKmYlnQv_dg image 2 is amazing..image 5 holey shit.. Sarah Palin who?Image 12 WWoooooooHHHooooooooo!!!YYEEEO OOWW!!...i LIKE IT when Shayla come around.....

[LynnT]

That its less about sex and more about actual companionship.

[Guest091813]

it's reconfirmed to me..
"you can never ever ever freakin ever judge a book by its cover!!!!!!!!!!!"

[jokacz]

Real world or hobby world, it's all about the Benjamins.

[tommylove]

personally i totally agree with lynnt. i have been in this life style so long that i got burnt out and left it three years ago. just recently coming back in on a limited basis. i'am 62 and still love seeing a lovely lady naked and pleasuring her with daty. i also enjoy the conversation with the lady. on my first visit with lynn she encouraged that.

[roscoe14850]

GFE & Companionship is the key, if I just wanted to bust a nut I could do it myself. I don't care if it is a transaction or not, there are genuine people on each side and I have formed relationships that I value.

[clikrSYR]

Originally Posted by petiteassman

on that subject since you are posting in wny section are you planning a visit here. please say yes.

To that, I think I saw a thread where she mentioned she was thinking about it.

To Shayla, that is a very provocative you have asked there, and more so given the very nature of the hobby. This is a lifestyle of secrecy - of dual identity even. We (men) hide behind fake names for multiple reasons and search out what we are missing in our daily lives. What have I learned through this? I'm going to come back to this in a bit. Answering a serious question in depth on a phone keyboard is taxing. Back inn a few....

[Lexxxy]

I have learned that everyone has something attractive and beautiful about them. I also learned that no matter what someone looks like on the outside personality can make or break if they are sexxxy or not.
There is a Gent on another site that is BEAUTIFUL I mean just wow drool your face off over him, his body is like a Greek god, and every detail is just wow BUT he has a hard time get a date, I personally would never see him again. He is rude, vulgar, doesn't respect Ladies and our time (shows up late, stays over 15-30 mins without tipping to make up for it), he only talks about himself (how "awesome" he is), he will burp in your face, he doesn't have good hygiene(stinky balls *gag*), and he asks personal inappropriate questions("What is your real name?","How many people have you had sex with?","Where you chicks all touched as children?","How much money do you make a day?"...). He is BEYOND BEAUTIFUL outside but his personality, lack of respect, and demeanor make him HIDEOUS. I would take a respectful nice Gent that looks like Shrek over him any day and have a great time.

[clikrSYR]

What has this hobby or lifestyle taught you? Gentlemen, have you gained more confidence talking to women or people in general? Have your social skills improved? Positive and negative experiences taught you anything? Most importantly, what have you learned about yourself and others?

For me personally, I haven't carried much from the hobby into my personal life. I think most people are in the hobby because they lack the personality for real-life 'pickups.' Of course there are men in the hobby for the convenience or for the excitement wrapped around taking this kind of risk, but I would bet a "hobby account deposit" that most men are here to fork out the money because it seems to be the only, or at least the best option for feeding the need. For me, that is certainly the case. I'm the guy that always says the wrong thing and quickly scares off any woman who may have been interested at a glance. Maybe some men can make a nice translation from hobby to personal life but my first thoughts on approaching a beautiful woman since hobbying are along the lines of, "what do you think she'd go down for, $100, $200?" Hobbying simplifies an otherwise overcomplicated dance between two people who have mutually symbiotic needs, at least it does in an over-thought, over-rational mind like mine. I am not able to make a connection between the two worlds in that way.

The biggest benefit in my personal life has been with my SO. Things had been getting very stale. I lacked interest, and it wasn't entirely based on her 80lb weight gain. It was almost as though I forgot what it felt like to be interested. I actually thought I was experiencing a premature but age driven lack of drive. Then I discovered the hobby and found that my drive is just fine. This made me think about my relationship with my SO differently and I was able to rekindle some of what we had lost.

I am still here obviously, for obvious reasons and for reasons that may not be as obvious. I am enjoying the hobby because it exists. I love women and I love meeting all of you and trying to learn what makes you tick.

Thank you for giving me a chance to ramble!

[offshoredrilling]

"What has this hobby or lifestyle taught you? Gentlemen, have you gained more confidence talking to women or people in general? Have your social skills improve? Positive and negative experiences taught you anything?"

mmmmm I'm not use to loaded "?'s" from providers till I seen them for few years. Now how can I answer this without making problems. hummmmmmmm carp oh well

I decline to answer at this time. but will think about it. maybe later.

[Jon Colden]

My journey's not over yet, so my learning experiences are equally incomplete.

But so far, I agree with 100% with Lynn. It isn't really all about the sex and it isn't all about the envelope. It's about making a connection, about catching lightning in a bottle. Having that rare moment that makes a memory that will last a lifetime.

As it seems sometimes, basbeall players are more successful at the plate than I've been in catching that lightning. I'm getting better at it, but it still is a challenge. Easy to get discouraged or get jaded, I feel sometimes like I'd do better at playing the stock market.

There's also an introspective aspect to it. I've learned things about myself I didn't realize before. Meeting the right people has helped me with that.

[orogenic]

Originally Posted by LynnT

That its less about sex and more about actual companionship.

Originally Posted by roscoe14850

GFE & Companionship is the key, if I just wanted to bust a nut I could do it myself. I don't care if it is a transaction or not, there are genuine people on each side and I have formed relationships that I value.

All of that plus the passion and intimacy when you do connect beyond the transaction. Those are worthwhile bonuses to the physical release of the act itself and usually come with longer term relationships but sometimes comes early. Maybe it's part of the mystery of humanity.

[NormalBob]

None of this was new because I'm old and generally observant. However, the examples are great because they exist in such a narrow confine that the teaching points really are stark.

ABOUT OTHERS:

A whole lotta people are out of control either with intimacy issues, money issues, substance abuse issues, ethical issues, etc. Some you can pick out easily because they walk around with neon lights advertising their issues. Some others are really good at covering up their shix. As a result, a naive person can come to trust someone too quickly because there is sex involved, a cultural rite that for most older guys involved some level of real trust when they were learning about male/female relationships as a teenager.

You'll never know who your real friends are until you need them. This one is worth repeating:
YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHO YOUR REAL FRIENDS ARE UNTIL YOU NEED THEM.

The companion piece to the above is that some people want to phuck you over for some sick reason and if they know too much, they can and will phuck you over. These are dark, dark individuals that know how to present a false image of themselves.

For the most part, everyone acts in their own self-interest. That is reflected in the money exchange and the attitudes/approaches of both genders.

Never, ever loan a provider money that you can't afford to never see again. Even if you get paid back, it's bad business and relationship boundary management.

There are some really, truly great women who have found a balance between renting their intimacy, maintaining their ethics, and taking care of their real-life loved ones. Meeting and getting to know some of those special women is the pearl in the oyster buried in the sand of a turbulent sea.

ABOUT MYSELF:

I'm addicted to the excitement of having sex with a new person.

I phucking love it when a woman cums. It's like watching 10,000 doves released into the air.

Having P4P as an option is great because I have almost destroyed my marriage on a couple of occasions by having affairs.

I married well. She understands my addiction and only asks that I don't bring it home.

SUMMARY:

Click the ice cream cone on the blond's butt below for the summary.