EMOTIONAL VAMPIRES

[WTF]

Originally Posted by ClairJordan

It's up to the lady to decide where her boundaries are and how to enforce them. And sorry kids, I think it's ridiculous to think any type of person is more needier than another. We's all just flesh and blood.

At different points in time my view of what is needy and what is not, changes.

Folks, If they are to needy for you, then move on, it does not make them needy only to needy for you at this point in time.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by ClairJordan

It's up to the lady to decide where her boundaries are and how to enforce them. And sorry kids, I think it's ridiculous to think any type of person is more needier than another. We's all just flesh and blood.

you`re right abot the boundaries. where you are wrong is when the provider is WAY younger than the guy in question and not mature enough to see what is comeing to her.
and no i think there are people that are emotionally abusive. Its easy to realize. The ones that don`t treat you with respect and manage to have imbalanced relationships (private ones , not paid ones) are.
The other ones are not.
But i have seem many escorts (me including) doing things that are plain stupid because they have been too young of age and too naive to actually see the reality. and the clients who did that, have already had an array of lovers lost so they *know* exactly where the game goes.

Hey, some of them are even fancy enough to drop the same line to every gf.
when i got to know the new one of my ex, i thought i was in "groundhogs day". same storyline. I wasn`t sure if she was telling me my life or if i was dreaming :-)) (lol). and he is a chronical abuser (emotionally) no matter what fancy rationalizations all involved used. I mean aafter pulling me thru this shit he had the guts to do the same to another provider as if NOTHING has ever happened?
that IS sick. and premeditated and abusive. Intelligent people who are capable of emotional empathy would not do that. its only people who have to face no consequences who do that. and unfortunately the combination sick prick and escort is a bulletproof for no consequences on client side :-).

[WTF]

Originally Posted by acp5762

You didn't understand anything I wrote. The original post was about people who are clingy and needy. .

OK, got that clingy/needy part and I do not agree with your first sentence after this explaination.

Originally Posted by acp5762

. Nobody really appreciates a person who is overly needy and clingy. .

That is just not true. Most do not but some do. Haven't you read, they exploit them. They need needy people if you will.

Originally Posted by acp5762

What I was trying to convey and apparently you didn't get it, is a person who is clingy or needy is born out of an individual who has not developed a sense of self. .

Oh, I got it. I do not totally agree with it but I got it.

Originally Posted by acp5762

In other words they look for validation from other people instead of from within. .

We all do that, some more than others. Marshall does not look for it in others as much as many on here seem to, yet if there was a poll taken he migght fall short on the 'healthy' side according to the tone of all the replys he has generated.

Originally Posted by acp5762

They almost go around asking people " Am I ok, do you like me. Now go back and read the very first post and all those that follow. And write back and tell me what you've learned.

I have learned that we all have different versions of what is needy....wait, I already knew that. I have learned that on philosophical questions there is not a right or wrong. Just what is right or wrong for each....wait I knew that.

May I ask if you have learnt anything?

[Camille]

" I need you to need me" is classic co-dependency.
Both parties suck the life out of EACH OTHER.
Whilst ex addicts have long been identified of being one of the most susceptible groups to engage in co-dependent behavior (loads of data out there to support this) they are by no means the only ones by a long shot. As Clair and WTF said, co-dependency is not restricted to certain groups and is not always viewed as unattractive.

C

[acp5762]

Originally Posted by WTF

OK, got that clingy/needy part and I do not agree with your first sentence after this explaination.




That is just not true. Most do not but some do. Haven't you read, they exploit them. They need needy people if you will.




Oh, I got it. I do not totally agree with it but I got it.





We all do that, some more than others. Marshall does not look for it in others as much as many on here seem to, yet if there was a poll taken he migght fall short on the 'healthy' side according to the tone of all the replys he has generated.




I have learned that we all have different versions of what is needy....wait, I already knew that. I have learned that on philosophical questions there is not a right or wrong. Just what is right or wrong for each....wait I knew that.

May I ask if you have learnt anything?

You ask if I have learned anything. Yes, but not particularly from you at this point anyway. Everything you stated maybe true, and quite frankly generalized and matter of fact. Yes people seek out needy people and exploit them. As people we are social beings we certainly need eachother we need interaction with eachother. If we are not in the company of others we are quite often thinking about someone, thats how important others are to us. You stated something in your last post that " No Man Is an Island" that is absolutly correct. We all must have relationships in our lives. But to recap what these escorts were saying in the main post was they saw guys that from what I could gather wanted to be viewed by their escort as a significant other be in a relationship of some sorts. They were getting phone calls, Text Mesg, emails they appeared clingy or needy as if they needed this escort for something more than was initially offered. These escorts could not accomodate that. They had other clients, other areas of their life that required more of their attention than this overwhelming client. This sort of behavior happens in conventional relationships as well and the outcome is seldom favorable. So to narrow this down to the Escort Client interaction. You know why you're there, so does she. You place some cash on her dresser, you aren't going to sit and talk about the economy, no. You're there for sex. She's human. she may find you nice, attractive. She may even find you to be the type she would date under normal circumstances, but thats not the deal. Some guys go away thinking that though. It doesn't matter if you see an escort numerous times, take her on extended vacations with you. You are still paying for sex and her time and she is not your girlfriend. She will do with others as she has done with you. She has provided you with something you feel you needed, for compensation. Thats an escort, thats all she is. Now a guy who contacts her with a purpose and understands what the limits and provisions are, not only understands her, but himself as well. But the guy thats unable to decipher the true meaning and reason for their meeting and crosses boundries with an escort comes off as being clingy, needy or just plain creepy. I'll say this. What you do and how you interact with an escort may very well be how you'll interact with any women you're in a relationship with.

[CL1962]

As I see it, Relationships be it man/woman, man/work, man/society, etc... will fit in to varying degrees of 2 catagory's.

Parasytic or Symbionic

Symbionic = individual retains one's identity while nuturing another.
Parasytic = one's identity is based on approval or sacrifice of another.

No psychobabble here, just a simple model to use as a tool to see where I stand in any situation / person / place / or thing.

[Marshall]

Originally Posted by ninasastri

my pleasure darling..... when where?

Wow! You're a very freakie girl! Your sex life sounds just like enhanced interrogations!

[WTF]

Originally Posted by Camille

" I need you to need me" is classic co-dependency.
Both parties suck the life out of EACH OTHER.
Whilst ex addicts have long been identified of being one of the most susceptible groups to engage in co-dependent behavior (loads of data out there to support this) they are by no means the only ones by a long shot. As Clair and WTF said, co-dependency is not restricted to certain groups and is not always viewed as unattractive.

C

Hey Cammy , here is another point, many co dependents are the addicts spouses, they cling to the addict in hopes of changing them. That is usually borne from some condition response from their childhood. Mom trying to save Dad...... What generally happens is they in fact whined up enabling them. A viscous pattern of a dog chasing its tail. We are creatures of habit, good and bad!

Originally Posted by Camille

" co-dependency is not restricted to certain groups and is not always viewed as unattractive.

C

Great point, afterall what would AA be without their alcoholics!

Originally Posted by acp5762

You ask if I have learned anything. Yes, but not particularly from you at this point anyway. .

I was not asking if you had learnt anything from me. God help us all if that was my purpose in life!

All I was really tring to do was point out how silly I thought your exact same question to me was.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by Marshall

Wow! You're a very freakie girl! Your sex life sounds just like enhanced interrogations!

Breath play is certainly on my menu. so you`re in for some fisting and some breath play?

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by WTF

Hey Cammy , her is another point, many co dependents are the addicts spouses, they cling to the addict in hopes of changing them. That is usually borne from some condition response from their childhood. Mom trying to save Dad...... What generally happens is they in fact whined up enabling them. A viscous pattern of a dog chasing its tail. We are creatures of habit, good and bad!

exactly. that is how some marriages sustain with the help of secret lovers and how some pretentious wanna be HDHs sustain their inflated sense of self instead of the long overdue knock on realities door :-)

[Guest083011]

All: I am not sure why the quote links are goofy. I've manually cleaned them up (hopefully, I have done them correctly). Other threads are posting fine, maybe it was a small corruption for just this thread. We will now join our program already in progress.

[Marcus Aurelius]

Originally Posted by ninasastri

Breath play is certainly on my menu. so you`re in for some fisting and some breath play?

LOL.

nina tightens the blindfold around Marshal's head. She leans close and whispers...."Not too tight?"

Marshal. "I'm OK." He pants.

Marshal hears her heals "click click" and stop right behind him. His heart beats faster.

What he doesn't see. What he can't see, is WTF greasing a baseball bat with Vaseline.

[Marshall]

Originally Posted by ninasastri

Breath play is certainly on my menu. so you`re in for some fisting and some breath play?

Good thing my SERE training is up to date!

But, I'll certainly keep my eyes open for VW vans and trucks following me down the street. I don't want to get locked and chained in some god-foresaken basement somewhere with only David Hasselhoff records playing all day...........

[Marshall]

Originally Posted by Marcus Aurelius

LOL.

nina tightens the blindfold around Marshal's head. She leans close and whispers...."Not too tight?"

Marshal. "I'm OK." He pants.

Marshal hears her heals "click click" and stop right behind him. His heart beats faster.

What he doesn't see. What he can't see, is WTF greasing a baseball bat with Vaseline.

You had me worried up to the point you said WTF had the bat....I figure he swings like a girl and probably has the Vaseline end in his hands [nasty habit]......

[WTF]

Originally Posted by Marshall

You had me worried up to the point you said WTF had the bat....I figure he swings like a girl and probably has the Vaseline end in his hands [nasty habit]......

Yea Marshall, I will Vaseline my hand and you'll be my puppet

Originally Posted by SR Only

Other threads are posting fine, maybe it was a small corruption for just this thread. We will now join our program already in progress.

I thought it was TFF, people quoting people saying chit they didn't say!

Kept you on your toes