Does the Provider have a responsibility to maintain the Relationship Boundaries? Do Both? Is it wrong for a Provider to keep seeing a Client that is getting emotionally involved?

[knotty man]

i doubt any woman who has truly given up the avocation would still be posting in here. But, there is this one....

[budman33]

yes I got one too... damn women and their feminine charms! and then thanks!

[Whispers]

Originally Posted by budman33

Your kidding right?

nope. Not at all...

[derek303]

I believe she is using him and that could turn dangerous. She should refuse service.

[budman33]

and mcDonalds should stop selling mcGriddles

[irishlad]

Originally Posted by Whispers

Does the Provider have a responsibility to maintain the Relationship Boundaries? I think so. They are the professional in the relationship after all.

Do Both? Is it wrong for a Provider to keep seeing a Client that is getting emotionally involved?

I think it is, in all honesty, because I believe at that point she begins to take advantage of the hold/control she has over the client....

What advice would you be giving to a guy that has knowingly "fallen" a bit too far into the "experience"

What would you say to a lady that knowingly continued to see a guy that she had no reciprocating feelings for?

Is he just a dumb sap that deserves what gets?

Loneliness drives a percentage of the guys in the hobby..... For some it's just about sex.... but for others.... it's a variety of reasons.....

You don't have to lie to be a provider.

If she's just doing her thing, being pleasant and taking her money that it is 100% on the delusional sap. I know it is a revolutionary thought, but so what if you have unrequited feelings. That doesn't justify acting like an idiot. Man up and eat it, keep your head. Heartbreak happens and is something you can recover from completely and your feelings for someone else incur absolutely no obligation on them, ever, in any context - p4p or real life. Accept this and love freely.

"Socially inept" is not a birth defect. A couple of broken hearts survived and the right attitude is a great way to get "socially ept".

If she's telling him that he's special, that she knows that their relationship began "professionally" but she thinks that maybe this might be something more going on...really, I know how crazy it sounds but I think we belong together... but it is all BS to keep the money flowing, than she's nothing more than a con artist and while yes, she is being "irresponsible" and I would condemn her as scum, she probably doesn't give a damn what I think.

[KlassyKelliAnn]

Originally Posted by Whispers

Does the Provider have a responsibility to maintain the Relationship Boundaries? I think so. They are the professional in the relationship after all.

Ditto. I think the provider should always be aware of this scenario. She would be the one to be more knowledgable about such a thing happening in the first place and I am sure she'd have experienced it before on more than 3 ocassions at least. -KKA

Do Both? Is it wrong for a Provider to keep seeing a Client that is getting emotionally involved?

Yes, both do but perhaps not to the same degree. A client should respect the business boundaries of the relationship. After all, he knows she is a whore and nothing more. It is not like he met her on eHarmony.com. But shit happens especially with those men NEW to the hobby. I do believe, in my experience, these men are more susceptible to falling in love in such a situation. The provider, if she knows what she is doing and notices the advances, etc should immediately terminate any relationship with such a client. Many of the times, if they do not, it leads to terrible things happening. -KKA

I think it is, in all honesty, because I believe at that point she begins to take advantage of the hold/control she has over the client....

I can easily see this happening. But again, as I mentioned above, this can lead to bad things happening. Stalking is one of the very many. Murder of passion is perhaps the worst. In my opinion as an adult entertainer for many years, I personally have a very difficult time believing one can have a relationship in this biz as a provider. Especially meeting in this biz and being together- nope. Unsuccessful. But that is just me. So....... - KKA

What advice would you be giving to a guy that has knowingly "fallen" a bit too far into the "experience"

I would have to say "Screw your head back on and think about this!" -KKA

What would you say to a lady that knowingly continued to see a guy that she had no reciprocating feelings for?

If here were in love with her.....I would have to give a lecture. Not cool. -KKA

Is he just a dumb sap that deserves what gets?

I think it is more of a 60/40 split. But he shouldnt be in love in the first place. Most of the time I think it is merely infatuation anyhow. I mean come on! LOL-KKA

Loneliness drives a percentage of the guys in the hobby..... For some it's just about sex.... but for others.... it's a variety of reasons.....

True, true and that explains alot. But honestly, why would a guy want to be with me as a provider who sleeps with other men? Even if he was ok with it and agreed it is just my job. He would always wonder after the fact, I think. And wouldnt the provider start thinking/wondering if he is actually seeing other providers once he had the taste of excitement? I just dont see it working out. It is just best left as strictly business. DONT get emotional people! lol-KKA

I have heard some success stories I must admit. But these are few and far between and if I had to juggle a percent of those that worked out vs otherwise it would be 2%success and 98%broken hearts.

KKA
XOXO

[Whispers]

WOW.......

Two phenomenal posts that I totally agree with.

[sixxbach]

Originally Posted by Whispers

WOW.......

Two phenomenal posts that I totally agree with.

Yes indeed... KKA has ALWAYS been one to tell it like it is regardless what any hobbyist or provider thinks for that matter....

sixx

[guest031913-2]

I good provider has the responsibilities of setting limits, just as in psych work there is a bond that builds of trust between client and provider. Once we see a shift it is time to release from the professional relationship. I have to admit I did the same thing and actually started seeing a client from here, screwed up and fell in love with him.......... problem being you can't fall in love with a client. They always look at you as a provider. I got hurt myself because I am the only provider that he ever saw that he did not review........... Hell I am 50 yrs old with 2 degrees and acted like a teenager.

Point is 99% of the time our purpose is to fill a need with our clients, never take advantage and never allow them too cross personal boundries. Trust is a 2 way street.
Many Blessings

[Rand Al'Thor]

Originally Posted by Whispers

Does the Provider have a responsibility to maintain the Relationship Boundaries? I think so. They are the professional in the relationship after all.

I disagree, they are the pros, but responsibility for ones actions do not stop because you're engaged in a hobby, entertainment or professional endeavor.

Do Both? Is it wrong for a Provider to keep seeing a Client that is getting emotionally involved?

I think it is, in all honesty, because I believe at that point she begins to take advantage of the hold/control she has over the client....

Wrong? Maybe. It would depend on her behavior, if she is leading him on, she does get blamed for being a con. This does not lessen the responsibility of the guy for falling for her and being taken advantage of.

Besides, if we go by your logic that the provider is responsible, we can't make fun of WKs anymore because it's not their fault they're PW.

What advice would you be giving to a guy that has knowingly "fallen" a bit too far into the "experience"

What would you say to a lady that knowingly continued to see a guy that she had no reciprocating feelings for?

Is he just a dumb sap that deserves what gets?

Even if a guy is feeling more than he should for a provider, it is still possible to reign that in and continue. I can hardly blame a provider for not cutting off a regular.

Loneliness drives a percentage of the guys in the hobby..... For some it's just about sex.... but for others.... it's a variety of reasons.....

Indeed.

Originally Posted by budman33

Your kidding right? a human being is a human being. Hobbiests come from one side, escorts the other. Inevitably feelings can happen...I've dated companions that I have both seen or not seen but know what they do. Makes them no less a genuine person than me, who does the same thing from the other side of it.

no such thing as a whore is a whore any more than a douchebag is a douchebag ... well

I think you misread what was said. Whore is a whore is a whore... is offensive and demeaning only if you see prostitution as less than honest. We can call a provider a whore, prostitute, hooker, call girl, escort, or a provider, it does not change what she does. It also does not make any inference on her humanity, just as a John, trick, monger or hobbyist makes no claims on us other than our participation.

The distinction made was in the connotation some seem to put around different labels. Courtesan seems to imply a higher level of professionalism than hooker or whore. Maybe there are more expectations from a provider or courtesan than a hooker or a whore just as I have a higher expectation of a Master Sushi chef than I do from someone who cuts fish.

Do those higher expectations include taking responsibility for another person's feelings and actions? No.

Originally Posted by budman33

and mcDonalds should stop selling mcGriddles

No, but they should stop advertising their salads as "healthy".

[WyldemanATX]

I think they have no responsibility at all. If you are man be a man and not a wuss, sack up grow some balls. I think a lot of men in today's day and age have become very weak and need to get some back bone...