Men, when do you walk away??

[Holly]

OK I have a good friend of mine who got caught by his wife about 4 months ago....his wife STILL calls me to this day LOL....He has given her TONS of personal info about me that I trusted him with!

My question to the guys is, When do you just walk away and figure out she will never forgive you or make you stop paying for your mistake???

I mean he gave her is P411 name and password and they had to cancel his account and then gave her my personal info and she calls my real business phone EVERYDAY!! What is he hoping will happen??? If you get caught, your caught....work through it or walk away!!!

[Nitwitboy]

single so no problem here. Sorry Holly. That stinks. To quote another provider, they are asshats.

[flexywun]

single as well but maybe he can't afford to walk away.

[planojim]

Single all my life and happy with it.
If something goes painfully wrong in a relationship I just pick up my crap, don't dwell on it, and MOVE ON.
Holly, You're obviously NOT the bad person here at all. You're just being punished for his inability to take responsibility for his actions. Ignore her and hopefully the bitch will get tired of contacting you.

[incognito isis]

Holly, his wife calls you?? Why? what does she say?

Anyway, I had a regular client of mine who got caught by his wife last spring. I was seeing this out of town buisiness man at his hotel. We would meet up anywhere between 1 to 2 times per month. Eventually we developed a frienship for eachother. I mean, if you spend time with someone it's inevitable your going to feel eachother out. I felt at ease with him and we would talk about intimate things.

The truth is, I fell in love with him and this has been a great source of pain on my end. He is an older man, too. He's not even that good looking. I mean when I first started meeting him I was grossed out. Sorry getting off track here....

We met often when he was in town. He told me how unhappy he was in his marriage. He never crossed the line, but he asked me questions like: so what types of men do you go for, physicly? What celebrities do you find attractive? What are your plans for settling down? Are you really looking forward to having children? The reason why I ask, is because I've had a visectamy.

Obviously, being with me was soemthing he was pondering. Anyway, I emailed him one day after he told me he would be putting his dog to sleep. He then said that the wife found out what he fooling around. That he didn't know what was going to happen. The wife went thru his bank statements and wanted to know why he was withdrawing $300 one to two times per month for the last 6 months. He told his wife he was using it to pay for an escort, me.....

The client told me that it's probably for the best we stop seeing eachother because he was beginning to fall for me. I told him I understood and best of luck....

A couple months later I was at home drinking wine, and I felt adventurous so I emailed him. I simply said: "I MISS YOU!" And I truely did. He was on my mind all the time. I had fallen in love. After 2 weeks he emailed me back, apologizing for not getting back to me sooner, but that he doesn't check his email too often. We flirted for a bit and talked about how much we missed eachother. But we didn't meet. I was in good spirits because I was going to Costa Rica.

I emailed him and told him to come with me to C.R. He said he wished he could but he would get in trouble with the wife, she has him on a short leash. When I was down in C.R. I checked my email and there was a sexy email from him. I got pissed off about something, I was drunk and I emailed him back: "go F**K Yourself."

I think I said that as a test, to see how he would respond. He responded as if he was hurt and confused. I took that as verification that he still cared for me. But then I never heard from him. As the weeks and months went by, I continued to think about this client. But then I realized, just after Halloween, that my feelings were finally fading....

I accepted the fact he went off in marital bliss with his wife. And honestly, I didn't really care anymore. I was over it. Happy to be free from this. Finally....over! And then....

The first week of November he emails me practicly begging to see me. I was so excited. There was a spring in my step. I accepted and the appointment was on. We had a great time. He told me he no longer comes to my neck of the woods just once a month.

[Tara Evans]

I am so sorry girl. If you want to meet up and have some fun to get your mind off of it let me know.

[pmdelites]

isis - sorry that you've gone thru all that.
it sure sounds like you have crossed many different lines that should have been observed and never crossed.
if it were me, i would just remove his contact info from any place i have it and move on. now, if he got divorced and asked you to begin something, maybe. but i just dont see a very good ending to this story. other than you moving on and learning from it.

like tara said, talk w/ some of the women her for some perspective and/or thoughts.

[incognito isis]

Tara, thank you for your support. You truely seem like a beautiful person inside as well as out.....

The truth is, I met the client again in November for our appoitnment. After that, whenever he was in town he just text messaged me. He gives me some BS story about his trip to town being last minute, so that is why he didn't make an appointment.
So once a month he texts me when he is in town. Usually it's in the middle of the night. I know he is lonely, so I engage in chatting with him via text.....

I made a terrible mistake in January. I met him off the clock for free. I ended up spending the entire evening with him. He told me his wife checks his bank account statements and so he is reluctant to withdraw the money. I told him it is OK I will meet you for free. Well, after that happened he didn't email or text me to say thank you. And it crushed me.

I suffered from some seasonal depression this past winter. It was hurting my business because I can't work if I'm depressed. Actually, I was depressed over this one client after the freebie mistake. I was angry that he was still with his wife. I admit, I fantacized being with him. I should have never met him for free. I feel used. I don't think I'm in love anymore, I hate him more.

Yes, I crossed the line. Recently, I decided to take his number out of my phone. I will not be communicating "via text" with him anymore. I am not anyones free texting buddy. My time is money and if he wants to converse with me it needs to be done at an appointment. I'm sorry he is so lonely while traveling, but he should be contacting his wife to ease his lonelyness, not using me. I crossed the line, oh my god did I cross the line!! But I'm only human, not perfect and well, shit happens.

I know he is not truely happy in his marriage, and perhaps he is afraid to persue anything with me because I am an escort. I mean, I can't blame him for that. For a traveling man, sometimes it's just easier to stay married then to get a divorce. It's not like he's around her that much anyway, he's always on the road.

So about 2 weeks ago I get another text message from him, it said: "Hey Hun, is it too late to talk??"
I took his number outof my phone, but I recognized his number. So I simply responded with: "who is this?"
I think that was verification that I took his number out of my phone. If he contacts me again I will tell him what I think: I will say, I'm sorry your too cheap to schedule an appointment with me. But I cannot be your texting buddy.

Honestly, I think his little shananigans with me is whats keeping him in his marriage. What, you ask? Yes, thats right, you heard me. He told me his wife is boring in bed so that is why he sought out my escorting services. I'm telling you, I think men use us to stay in their marriage. If it wasn't for us, the divorce levels would be even higher that what it is. All men need sexual healing, and most aren't getting it at home. So instead of getting a divorce, they stay in the marriage and come to us.

I feel this is what the situation is with my "client crush." I feel, if I stay away from him emotionally as well as physicly, it will hurt his marriage more. Because in time without any sexual satisfaction, he will get more and more unhappy. He told me he doesn't want to see out the services of anyone else, and call me an idiot but i believe him.

He's not a real hobbyist type. He always paid "after" our appointment and I know for a fact that wouldn't go over to well with most women in this biz. He said that the other experiences he had were horrible, but then he met me and I was just what the doctor ordered.....Anyway, thanks for reading my dilemma. I'm getting over this. I know I crossed the line.

Spring is around the corner. My vacation is coming up. My seasonal depression lifted. My thoughts are clearer now. The funny thing is, so many clients have developed crushes on me. But this is my story, of whenthe tables were turned.