An intriguing question for mature providers

[Chica Chaser]

Originally Posted by Naomi4u

He told her to GFY. That means go fuck yourself.

I missed that too. C'mon Chuck, you know better than that, we all have opinions, no matter how wrong they may be! And should be able to post them without getting rude comments back. Disagree respectfully. GFY is over the line.

[Chica Chaser]

Originally Posted by charlestudor2005

It's not just differing opinions. In almost every post I've ever read by Chella (and admittedly, she is somewhat new to this board, but apparently not new to this world), she has held men in extreme contempt. Contempt...and hate. Yet she continues to make her living off men...the beings she hates. It creates a basic response of distaste on my part, and I'm afraid I lash out at the conduct on her part.

So, you see, it's not differing opinions. It's attitude and acceptance. She has an ugly attitude toward men in general and does not accept them (except for their cash).

That may or may not be true, but doesn't warrant a GFY.

[Eccie Addict]

Excellent choice, Chellablaine. Manifested consistantly, honesty will eventually earn trust, which, as you know, is a very fragile commodity, one that is difficult to earn but easy to lose. And once lost, it is very difficult to ever achieve the same level of trust again. Without a deep, abiding sense of trust, two people will never achieve the level of respect that is the bedrock for the kind of love that we all seek, one that will last a lifetime.

One should be able to take for granted that people will say what they mean, mean what they say and do what they say they will do. Finding someone who consistantly lives up to this code, however, is not an easy task.[/QUOTE]

This is great!! I also value not just honesty but a willingness to ask for forgiveness and willingness to forgive. So many people just say sorry and leave it at that. Basically what they say is "sorry, take it or leave it" and that is not an apology. The quicker you take responsibility fit hurting another the easier it will be to forgive and restore that relationship.....

[MaxiMilyen]

Originally Posted by Eccie Addict

I always felt that you can still see all you need to see about a person within a good amount of time with them and their family. You should have access to their family and close friends. Having that access you can learn a lot about a person that they may not tell you. I've found red flags about someone I was interested in simply by being around family. Turns out I made the right choice. I think that living together without getting married gives you an out that I don't think should come with that kind of commitment. I understand divorce when physical or mental abuse occurs but otherwise I think everything else can be worked on.... Granted they have to be willing to work on it. I also realize those vows are spoken by two people not just one.

Commitment and marriage vs cohabitation may be a whole other thread....LOL I used to be very idealistic about many things in life, but as stated earlier, life experiences can change people.

[charlestudor2005]

Originally Posted by Chica Chaser

That may or may not be true, but doesn't warrant a GFY.

I had an English teacher once who said that educated people needn't use profanity because they know how to construct well written sentences. He also went on to say that profanity was used appropriately (and rarely) for emphasis. I've never said it on this board before. I felt it was warranted here. Obviously you don't.

[jughead1171]

Originally Posted by M A X

Commitment and marriage vs cohabitation may be a whole other thread....LOL I used to be very idealistic about many things in life, but as stated earlier, life experiences can change people.

Max that is spot on. I have had experiences in my life that have challenged and changed my thoughts and views.

[Lea Madisson]

Originally Posted by BreastLuvr

Folks, we have eclipsed 100 posts and are still going strong. The many permutations which this thread has assumed are intriguing in their own right, but please allow me to throw out the following observations regarding its primary focus, which was the effect of hormonal status on libido (particularly for pre-, peri- and postmenopausal women) and see what your opinions are.

For a woman who is still in love with her partner and knows that she is deeply loved by him, I can see no reason that their sexual expressions of affection should suddenly decline simply because of menopause. On the other hand, there is more than anecdotal evidence that it does impact the libido of many women. I have one close personal friend who finally decided to file for divorce because of a sexual drought with his wife that had persisted for years. Putting the time line together, it almost certainly bracketed the years during which she went through menopause. I don't know if the interplay between hormonal status and libido should be interpreted most accurately as a "cause-and-effect" relationship or more of a correlation. Perhaps it should be construed ultimately as both a contributing factor and a barometer of the overall health of the relationship, just as ED should be considered an early warning signal of future cardiovascular disease. Your thoughts?

The many instances of diminished and non-existent libido in wives is quite often a reason many of you fine gentlemen come to visit me and my counterparts. So, while I wouldn't wish the obvious drought on any man, I'm very happy to have the chance to meet you. And from talking to many men in that situation, it seems that an occasional visit with a provider takes the heat off a sexless (or sex-dimished) relationship at home and allows the gent to be a calmer, happier hubby.

And, on a personal note, I am 50+. I have always been a sexual animal. I have not gone through menopause so I can't speak to the diminished libido issue there. I must say, however, that should I get to that point, I will be searching for whatever remedy I can find. I can't imagine being sexless, nor would I want to!!