Being a veteran of this industry, I believe and I'd like to still believe that discretion IS something that both parties value. However, it's inevitable that either by accident or without meaning to harm someone, gossip and 'indiscretions' leak out. When I first began working, it was for an agency and the internet was not a part yet of the hobbiest/provider industry as it is now...imagine that and how the internet revolutionalized this profession and all those involved. At the agency, it was very competitive, ( and worse in a brothel) and many girls would badmouth the other girls to clients, hoping to get more 'biz' for themselves. Unfortunately, there were a few uncscrupulous clients who seemed to enjoy creating even more drama between the girls by telling them 'so and so thinks you're ugly' and so forth. Bottom line is: if you have nothing nice to say about someone, DON'T SAY IT. If you don't want aspects of your private life being shared and gossipped about, keep it to yourself.
But inevitably, especially with regulars ( and we can assume they can be more trusted in some ways too, revealing things to us providers in great confidence, one of the paradoxes of this business: we are perfect strangers when we meet the first time, and many times, intimate secrets and details are shared. Our vulnerability is revealed on both sides) we often end up sharing parts of our lives. Now some providers never tell the truth and neither do clients, they may tell different things to different individuals. I respect that.
Occasionally a client by mistake might reveal a little too much about, for example, a lady's incall location or other things about her in a review or to another provider who might be used as a reference. I kindly reminded a client of mine not to tell other providers or put in my reviews that my incall was 'LOCATED ON SUCH AND SUCH A STREET AND RIGHT BY SUCH AND SUCH LAKE' and that I had beautiful things in my incall. He literally put it all out there. He was very old and may have not realized his mistake, but it could have been potentially harmful.
With personal details, well, I think everyone has their own personal boundaries about that. Clients know I work at the gym, and a few of them know which gym. One even LOL recognized me from the gym and I didn't have a problem with that, because if he went around talking about it, I don't think the other gym members would appreciate the fact that he was married, an outstanding member of the local community, and that he had children AND was looking at escort sites. We discreetly did set up an appointment, and to his joy, he finally got to see his favorite personal trainer in the buff
In this business I have met many wonderful men, a few of whom no longer hobby, but who have remained good friends over the years and whom I still go out to dinner with and communicate with. They are old friends, and we don't have a lot to hide from each other now. On the other extreme I've been married to one client and dated a few others, and they met my parents, and while my parents are aware of my work, we never bought it up naturally.
It's all up to the individuals as to how much discretion they want to use in their sessions and provider/hobbyist relationships.
What I DO know for sure is...if a client begins to gossip about another girl or a girl begins to badmouth a client ( unless he deserved it in some way, was dangerous or disrespectful) I immediately terminate that conversation with the old saying, " Don't say anything unless you have something nice to say, and I don't need to know where she/he lives or what he/she does for a living outside the biz or whether or not..." you get the picture.
Welcome to sticky-land CloudDancer!
