What's the best way to confirm in advance whether a provider will agree to your fetish?

[AdventurousMouse]

Incidentally, I was with a provider this weekend who didn't come prepared for my fetish.

We didn't have sex. We messed around though. Then, after the messing around, she said she'd go get prepared for my fetish (and come back in a bit). She never came back.

I paid her the full donation.

I was thinking of asking her if I could keep 20% of the donation as assurance she'd really come back...but I couldn't think of a way to run that idea by her without sounding insulting. She'd likely be insulted by me insinuating I don't trust her to really come back (as it turns out, however, I would have been right to not trust her)

All in all, I'd describe what the provider did as a scam. I paid the full donation for a session she only halfway followed through on.

Furthermore, this weekend's disaster totally validates why it's important to confirm ahead of time a provider will be prepared to do my fetish.

[Wile E Coyote]

Originally Posted by AdventurousMouse

I've always paid 100% of the donation, whether the session is sucky, excellent, or anything in between.

That is good and as I said, the right thing to do. But imagine if you could start with 100% of the donation and then subtract money based on what services the provider promised via her ad or conversation with you to get you to set an appointment with her. Many providers would go hungry if that were possible.

The ladies want respect for their time, well, so do I! Lots of providers do not care for providing true GFE and let you know it so I do not see those ladies, but I have respect for them. The providers who say they are all that and a bag of chips then are a mentally checked out dead fish fuck. I let providers know I do not like paying for that lack of service, and I get labeled as the asshole.

[AdventurousMouse]

Originally Posted by Wile E Coyote

That is good and as I said, the right thing to do. But imagine if you could start with 100% of the donation and then subtract money based on what services the provider promised via her ad or conversation with you to get you to set an appointment with her. Many providers would go hungry if that were possible.

The ladies want respect for their time, well, so do I! Lots of providers do not care for providing true GFE and let you know it so I do not see those ladies, but I have respect for them. The providers who say they are all that and a bag of chips then are a mentally checked out dead fish fuck. I let providers know I do not like paying for that lack of service, and I get labeled as the asshole.

You're 100% correct when you say respect for one's time is a 2 way street.

Not just with the escort thing either. Same thing applies to non-transactional dating.

Some have told me I'm over-the-top for getting pissed off when a woman I meet on a dating site ghosts me. I don't think I'm over-the-top though. All I want is the basic human decency of respecting my time.

I heard about a friendship app (yeah, society has really reached the point where social skills have been eroded so much there are apps for friendship) where they charge you a fee if you cancel or no show. If only dating apps did the same thing.

[ravenswallowz]

I always want my clients to ask me any questions for which they may require more info or a confirmation or explanation. I'd rather have all of our details set up than to have an unhappy client or a booking that didn't go as planned. Of course, I always tell my clients to read my bio and offerings in detail because they contain a lot of information about what I provide and it's important to know as much as possible before booking.

[AdventurousMouse]

Originally Posted by ravenswallowz

I always want my clients to ask me any questions for which they may require more info or a confirmation or explanation. I'd rather have all of our details set up than to have an unhappy client or a booking that didn't go as planned. Of course, I always tell my clients to read my bio and offerings in detail because they contain a lot of information about what I provide and it's important to know as much as possible before booking.

I like your approach.

If a client gets a little too detailed when asking about services (to the point where the provider suspect he's a cop), oh well, the provider has the right to refuse an appointment with the client. But that certainly beats running the risk of an upset client (if it turns out that, upon your arrival, you're unable/unwilling to engage in a certain thing the client wants)

I agree reading a bio/ad is ideal. There's a lot of information that can be learned from bios/ads. Unfortunately for me, however, there's no way my specific fetish would ever be listed in a bio/ad (and even if it were listed, that doesn't necessarily mean the provider will come prepared unless she's given advance notice that the client wants my specific fetish)

[Wile E Coyote]

A lot of the times, fetishes are why guys see providers in the first place.

After you get screened by the provider of your choice, tell her your fetish and see if she says she is comfortable in fulfilling it for you. The worst she can do is say no. Be careful where you ask it though. Here in Dallas, if you let a provider know what you like in a session you pay for, you are considered hard to please by most providers.

[AdventurousMouse]

Originally Posted by Wile E Coyote

A lot of the times, fetishes are why guys see providers in the first place.

After you get screened by the provider of your choice, tell her your fetish and see if she says she is comfortable in fulfilling it for you. The worst she can do is say no. Be careful where you ask it though. Here in Dallas, if you let a provider know what you like in a session you pay for, you are considered hard to please by most providers.

Unreal (that you're viewed as hard to please simply for having fetish preferences)