If you say so

[oeb11]

[Tiny]

Originally Posted by eccieuser9500

Check out my chemistry thread in the national sandbox. My last post.

Yum Yum!

I replied to your national post. I hope I don't get points, or blacklisted by the providers.

[dilbert firestorm]

Originally Posted by Strokey_McDingDong

Things have taken a turn for the worse. I am today literally pissing out of my asshole. No idea why. I already saw the doc. He requested a stool sample. I had one good solid loaf this morning, but since then my asshole is akin to some kind of great fountain. Hopefully I can get something solid tomorrow for the sample.

oh.. you had the runs. ok. shitting in your pants must be fun!


better luck next time.

[dilbert firestorm]

Originally Posted by Strokey_McDingDong

I think I'm not stroking enough.

thats because your ding dong is too small.

[dilbert firestorm]

Originally Posted by Strokey_McDingDong

Interesting. They gave me a giant ass tray that is designed to fit under the toilet seat. So you just let it all flop in, season to taste and then take a tea spoon.

I got to say, I will be a bit embarrassed if I fill that thing with water. I was shitting pure liquid for that last 5 hours or so. Things have cooled down. No idea wtf is going on. I would have guessed that I got COVID or something, but I've been dealing with these symptoms for a few months. So, can't be COVID, right?

I guess we'll find out. I'll be taking my sample tomorrow morning of hopefully semi-solid shit and hauling it to the lab.

looks like you ate some bad food that your bio system disagreed with.

[dilbert firestorm]

Originally Posted by HedonistForever

That's what that little stick is for. You reach down in the bowl with the little stick, touch it good to the stool and send them the stick. Easy pezzy. I do it every year.

you do it? why? you have diarrhea issues?

[Strokey_McDingDong]

I laid the rankest pile of shit in that god damn tray. I swear to H I M. It literally looked like a giant steaming pile of dog shit, and smelled worse than dog shit. I gagged several times spooning it into the little plastic tub labeled "specimen." My entire bathroom was heavily laden with an ungodly smell reminiscent of dog shit. It was almost orange due to the the chicken tikka masala I had the day before. My respects to the nurse who has to handle this literal shit. I'm glad I never chose nursing as an easy path to job security.

[winn dixie]

Hope you washed your hands

[Strokey_McDingDong]

It seems as though my body has transmogrified to piss out of my ass.

Please, pray for my asshole

[Tiny]

Originally Posted by Strokey_McDingDong

It seems as though my body has transmogrified to piss out of my ass.

Please, pray for my asshole

I will.

And what the fuck are you doing eating spicy Indian food when you've got diarrhea? Please remember, BRAT

Bananas
Rice
Apples (or Apple Sauce if you want to get Medieval and eliminate more fiber)
Toast (or other white bread)

And Probiotic yogurt.

That's what you can eat. No masala.

Your friend,

"Tough Love" Tiny

[Tiny]

Originally Posted by Strokey_McDingDong

It seems as though my body has transmogrified to piss out of my ass.

Please, pray for my asshole

I will.

And what the fuck are you doing eating spicy Indian food when you've got diarrhea? Please remember, BRAT

Bananas
Rice
Apples (or Apple Sauce if you want to get Medieval and eliminate more fiber)
Toast (or other white bread)

And Probiotic yogurt. And watermelon and grapes but not in huge quantities. Pedialyte if you're getting dehydrated.

That's what you can eat. No masala.

Your friend,

"Tough Love" Tiny

[eccieuser9500]

Mehdi Hasan say:

Originally Posted by Tiny

Please remember, BRAT

Bananas
Rice
Apples (or Apple Sauce if you want to get Medieval and eliminate more fiber)
Toast (or other white bread)

And Probiotic yogurt.

That's what you can eat.

What is that food for? An upset stomach? Or diarrhea?

[winn dixie]

may you have many 24 pack charmins and nice smelling wet wipes

[Tiny]

Originally Posted by eccieuser9500

Mehdi Hasan say:

What is that food for? An upset stomach? Or diarrhea?

Diarrhea. I know something about energy, taxes and diarrhea. Everything else I fake.

[Tiny]

Originally Posted by winn dixie

may you have many 24 pack charmins and nice smelling wet wipes

More good advice from the eccie brain trust. Charmin beats the hell out of single ply toilet tissue when you’re crapping ten times a day. I would argue for wet paper towels with no soap instead of wet wipes - the soap can irritate the anus. Wipe gently.

And at the risk of stating the obvious don’t flush them down the commode. I shouldn’t have to say that, but McDingDong is not exercising good judgement. Curry! My goodness.