Not Reference Friendy

[Renato85]

Just my afternoon rant. Also just wanted to get input from SA providers.
Recently I lost the opportunity to visit with a beautiful returning traveling Filipina provider. Mostly because none of the providers I have seen lately came through to verify me. I believe some never returned her messages and one lied and said she never heard of me (Fellow Asian Envy?)... Mind you, the traveling provider now thinks I am big fat liar!

Has anyone had similar experiences?
Do providers not like to verify guys they have seen?
I thought this was kind of a hobbying community that helped each other out and facilitated people meeting in the hobby, maybe I was wrong?!

[Guest101618]

I have been hearing from a number of providers that this is the new normal in SA. It kinda makes me nervous about seeing new providers if there isn't really any screening going on.

[CoverMe]

It’s a good habit to get into when visiting a lady for the first time to ask her before you leave if she will give you a reference. The ladies who say Yes are more likely to remember you when a reference request comes in and will feel obligated to respond. And there are some honest ones who will tell you straight up that they don’t give references to anyone and that they ignore all requests.

[Drtry1]

Try reviewing more often. With frequent reviews of established providers your more likely to be screened even when they do not vouch for you.

[JohnnyYanks]

Originally Posted by Renato85

... none of the providers I have seen lately came through to verify me ...

If you're not going to name them, then who cares?

Well, maybe the fellow hobbyist that encounters the SAME problem you had because YOU didn't give him a heads up?

[Drtry1]

Oh and think about it, if your not willing to give references why should they?

[Guest070618]

Originally Posted by Drtry1

Oh and think about it, if your not willing to give references why should they?

Every time I write a review I am giving a reference
The ladies should be just as kind

[Slave Guinevere]

Originally Posted by Renato85

Just my afternoon rant. Also just wanted to get input from SA providers.
Recently I lost the opportunity to visit with a beautiful returning traveling Filipina provider. Mostly because none of the providers I have seen lately came through to verify me. I believe some never returned her messages and one lied and said she never heard of me (Fellow Asian Envy?)... Mind you, the traveling provider now thinks I am big fat liar!

Has anyone had similar experiences?
Do providers not like to verify guys they have seen?
I thought this was kind of a hobbying community that helped each other out and facilitated people meeting in the hobby, maybe I was wrong?!

Morning Sweetie...

I am sorry to hear that you are having trouble with references... Alas, that has always been an issue in our world..

Let me begin by playing devil's advocate.. I am VERY reference friendly... I always have been... That is just how I want to run my business.. I am also not a jealous provider... I even have an assistant to assist with this process...

However, sometimes the ladies needing the reference may do the following things :

1) They may not contact the provider in the correct manner... Every provider has a method that they prefer to be contacted... For myself it is via email because I am in school all day and my work phone is not on me... Contacting my assistant, Nina the, via email allows the provider to get a reference between the hours of
9 am and 9 pm.

** Some ladies will not answer a request IF they are not connected by the right method, ie text, pm, email etc... This falls on the hobbyist and the provider needing the reference to find out the ladies preferred method.

2) Some providers do not provide the correct information... Nina and I usually need an email address... That is the easiest way for us to locate the hobbyist... However, if we see that the telephone number or eccie handle does not match then that is a red flag and may cause the provider to say she doesn't know you because she is now worried that this is not the correct person. We let the ladies know that the information does not correlate to what we have in our records..

3) Sometimes, the ladies needing the references are RUDE... It isn't as common with Nina and I but we have still had it happen. In that case we are going to let the hobbyist know that we are happy to provide a reference but that we would appreciate him letting his playmates know we appreciate a courteous request.

4) Sometimes, the lady needing the reference IS NOT reference friendly herself so the other ladies decide to ignore her needs since she does not reciprocate. That is a REAL ISSUE...

5) Sometimes, a hobbyist sees multiple providers a month but only uses ONE well known respected provider as his reference because he knows she will be responsible and return the request ASAP... The only problem with this is if the hobbyist has stopped seeing that lovely lady and she begins to feel used...

I have put my foot down on this because I was sometimes giving up to 15 references for one gentleman a month and that taxes my assistant... If you are seeing multiple ladies per month... share the love between all of them.. A happy provider is a reference friendly provider...

6) If the lady needing the request has the approximate date and time that the hobbyist saw her it will greatly facilitate the request...

Last but not least... References are a kindness that a provider CHOOSES to provide as a part of her overall experience... It is NOT a given and nor can you or anyone else require that she do it... Some ladies have been burned by other ladies and decide to opt out of the reference game... do I agree? Not really but I respect their choice...

I have only refused one reference request but I was honest with the lady and the gentleman... There was a SAFETY concern because a local provider was robbed and raped because of a bad reference provided by that lady... I then considered her to be a danger and I relayed my concerns to both parties...

My advice is to write reviews of the ladies that you have a good time with, check out p411 because the ladies get bonuses to give a guy an ok, check out TER 'S white list because it is similar to p411...

I hope your hobbying situation improves during the holidays... Have a great week..

Your affectionate slave,

Guinevere

[Samcro84]

^^ agree with P411 and TER idea. If you request an OK and lady does not respond with timely response she will have issues with P411 management.

Sam

[SA Angel]

Well I’ll go ahead and say it.

A very nice girl PM’ed for a reference. I originally couldn’t find the OP’s info in my contacts. I never saved him by his handle so I didn’t connect the two. Told the girl I hadn’t seen him.

This would have been the fifth time this past month someone tried using me as a reference that I never saw so I was a bit quick to dismiss it without going through my PM history like I normally do. This didn’t sit right with me so I researched some more and I realized I had met him once over six months ago. Less than 15 minutes later (edit: it was six minutes) I PMed her again to correct the mistake and gave a good reference. He PM’ed AFTER that to ask if I would be his main reference. I haven’t responded because I’ve been a bit busy. (To OP and anyone else I’ve seen: Sure but I will disclose how many months since our last visit if it’s been over three months.)

This would have been avoided altogether if he PM’ed or texted me first to remind me of his handle and our perfectly pleasant time together especially since it’s been over half a year.

Obviously I can’t post the content of PMs or screenshots with times but the OP is more than welcome to see them.

[Dr Grey]

Reference stuff usually always happens to be a classic example of miscommunication or not using references properly.

I always give a preferred method and how long it's been since I've seen someone. And usually the most recent if not seeing someone regularly. Also, I contact my reference to say exactly what SA Angel says, to let them know who you are, and who might be contacting them.

And like slave says, if you have a very reliable reference to see other girls, it is a good idea to circle back and share your stories of the references your lady provided before venturing out again. It's a great hobby relationship to have, and girl friend type experience without strings. They love stories and makes for a hot session. Slave can tell you, I'll attest to it with her as she's given me great references and I survived after seeing her and having hot stories to tell. Short of breath, but I've learned Wheaties are important as a good regular and references if using them.

[Renato85]

Thank you everyone that replied. Especially the lovely providers that took the time to chime in and give their side of the story!
It has helped me learn more about the hobby and also help me realize that I was also partially to blame... I am just getting started in this hobby. Have so much to left to learn and experience!
Everyone have a safe and joyous holiday season,
Ren

[Mokoa]

Originally Posted by milo

Every time I write a review I am giving a reference
The ladies should be just as kind

You would be incorrect, sir.

A review is just your side of the story. It would only be credible to the ladies' point of view if it matches with her side of the story. That is just one of the reasons a lady who you want to see will want information from the lady who saw you. The review alone will not always establish a reference.

[ck1942]

Interesting thread, from all sides of the equation.

imo, perhaps it might be easier on all hands if reviewers were to include some info about contacting methods and reference requirements.

But I am not suggesting that the review format be more accommodating, because, quite frankly, that could expose more than a few providers who are very lax on screening (perilous, imo) or who rarely appear to screen.

That said, any (and indeed every!) screening and vouching method is up to the individual provider.

I know several who rely on a telephone conversation ("I go with my gut") and tell me they have never had any issues.

And I know of some who want total i.d. and even Facetime contact.

And everything in between.

Providers are entitled to set their own levels of screening process, and

Hobbyists are entitled to either accommodate to those level or pass up the opportunity to meet some very fine (or not so fine) companions.

Bellyaching from either side of the equation doesn't add much to the hobbying experience, imo.

ijs

[DallasRain]

being refernce friendly is top priority in screening...its a big bad world and we should respect the others in this hobby by doing so!