Question About References

[Guest122620]

Hello Everyone!
So I have a Quick Question about References...... When a Provider ask a gentleman for references and he provides the references to the provider. Does the provider have to ask if it's ok to contact the references the gentleman provided?

[DasAmebas]

If the guy didn't want a reference contacted then he shouldn't have provided it.
A reference you can't contact is not a reference.

[Guest122620]

That's what I was thinking as well. After he provided them. I replied saying that I had send them a PM and I was just wanting on a reply. The gentleman then said that I didn't ask if it was ok...You don't know what type of agreement we have.
I told him I didn't need to asked if it was ok that I contacted them that's what we do when given references. That whatever​ they had going on has nothing to do with me.

[EastTexasGrown]

Originally Posted by DasAmebas

If the guy didn't want a reference contacted then he shouldn't have provided it.
A reference you can't contact is not a reference.

I even go so far as to make sure my references were contacted and that they replied. If she isn't actually checking the references that I provided, then she is a risk to me of being compromised by LE. What if she doesn't check references and her client before me was LE. Yep, I'm a sitting duck walking into a trap!!

The only exception I might have to this would be when I am setting up a date through p411. I know that she might simply be looking at my OKs and using them to see if I am worth seeing. I know LE can still get into P411 but simply knowing she is a p411 Playmate is enough for me as I know most p411 Playmates take a little more pride in who they are and how they operate. I used the word "most". I didn't say "all". But it is enough for me to feel comfortable.

[Avedissabian]

You were right, and he was wrong. Why the hell would a guy contact you for some time together, give you references, then complain you didn't ask? He sounds like alotnof drama. Did he not expect you to actually make sure he wasn't an idiot? He doesn't deserve your time, ma'am.

[Melissa Madyson]

Originally Posted by MissJae713

Hello Everyone!
So I have a Quick Question about References...... When a Provider ask a gentleman for references and he provides the references to the provider. Does the provider have to ask if it's ok to contact the references the gentleman provided?

Have to ask permission to check with the references he provided for you to use. That is his job to ask his references if it is ok to use them, @ least that is what most normal men do...
M.M.

[causewaycommuter]

Originally Posted by Melissa Madyson

Have to ask permission to check with the references he provided for you to use. That is his job to ask his references if it is ok to use them, @ least that is what most normal men do...
M.M.

Melissa, now why do you have to start bringing things like assumptions of normalcy to the board? You know better than that

Jae, count me as another vote that it's up to the guy to make sure his references are ok with actually being references.

[GemmaParadise]

How are they even references if you can't check them? If a client gets upset about that it seems like he doesn't understand the point of references.

[ZorahMatta]

Something smells fishy.

Originally Posted by MissJae713

That's what I was thinking as well. After he provided them. I replied saying that I had send them a PM and I was just wanting on a reply. The gentleman then said that I didn't ask if it was ok...You don't know what type of agreement we have.
I told him I didn't need to asked if it was ok that I contacted them that's what we do when given references. That whatever​ they had going on has nothing to do with me.

[wildwing]

I have had quite a few ladies give me there phone number but also tell me not to share with anyone, not even providers which i took to mean she did not want to provide references.

[MajicPlayground]

Wild, I know I tell my guys the same thing... please don't share my #, I am VERY picky about that. But am also clear that I am reference friendly as well, just please ask them to contact me via eccie or p411.
From a checking standpoint, I prefer to have a providers handle so I can verify she IS a provider, not just some text app number or fake email
Majic

[wildwing]

Originally Posted by MajicPlayground

Wild, I know I tell my guys the same thing... please don't share my #, I am VERY picky about that. But am also clear that I am reference friendly as well, just please ask them to contact me via eccie or p411.
From a checking standpoint, I prefer to have a providers handle so I can verify she IS a provider, not just some text app number or fake email
Majic

Very good points indeed Majic. A lot of providers though request a phone number because some people dont check their PMs regularly causing delays. Seems to me though if a monger has many reviews, the provider checking references could just PM the providers i reviewed. Too bad that ECCIE doesn't do something like the P411 thing.