Sounds ladies don't like.

[CalvinHall]

Aw shit, it seems I have forgotten my wallet.

[thebuffmantraples]

Are you running a "special"

[jayhawkrobbie]

A fire alarm...this happened once.

[JayceeRivers]

Originally Posted by jayhawkrobbie

A fire alarm...this happened once.

Any alarm at all!

Anything breaking

Things said a lady would not want to hear

"I like that you are thicker than my girlfriend"
"So I had a date earlier today, and boy was she riddled with sores. I am so glad you are much cleaner" (no this has never happened to me personally)
"What do I do for a living? Oh I work in law enforcement."
"It's normal to bleed a little out of your penis right?"
"I really wanted to see so and so. you were available and she wasn't...so here I am"
"OPEN UP THIS IS THE..."
"No where in your profile/ad it said I HAD to wear a condom...."
"I know we just met but I love you...marry me"
"I like the other panties. The ones I saw you wearing last night through your window. Those were cute"
"No I am not working right now, Was just released from prison"
"You would look good in my basement"
"My mother gave me your number"
"Can we do this one quick? My wife is due home in an hour" (Yes this one DID happen to me personally)

[Wizard of Ahhhhs]

Originally Posted by JayceeRivers

Things said a lady would not want to hear

"I know we just met but I love you...marry me"

And I'm sure you've heard that phrase a time or two, as well, Jaycee.

No love... just a helluva lot of lust, my dear.

[SinsOfTheFlesh]

"I don't normally cry after sex. Its just the pepper spray"
"Oh damn, I left my wallet in my other pants"
"You're clean, right?"
"HOUSE KEEPING!!"
"Uh oh, where did the condom go?"
"Oops, sorry about that skid mark"
(in public) "Chastity! Hey Chastity! Its me Mark! I saw you last week, remember?!?"
"Oh shit, call 911!"

The ominous sound of the garage door opening (Yes, actually happened to me, and its why I don't do outcall to residences anymore LOL)

[royamcr]

Ya, "I'm having a heart attack" would be awkward to hear.

[i'va biggen]

Damn that sounded like my wife's car door... Or honey i'm home.

[DallasRain]

"Don't be too loud ,the kids are sleeping in the other room"....It HAS happened to me..lol!

[royamcr]

Lol nice. Not gonna any best dad of the year award there.

[Guest090620-1]

I know we agreed on $200 for an hour, but I don't have that I only have $60 but I'm really handsome and my dick is pretty big I think you'll really like it and I'm already here so $60 is good right??

[old door builder]

Will you take a check?

[SexyKaylen]

lol u silly

Originally Posted by old door builder

Will you take a check?

[Longermonger]

Whoa!

Originally Posted by JessicaKCRabbit

I know we agreed on $200 for an hour, but I don't have that I only have $60 but I'm really handsome and my dick is pretty big I think you'll really like it and I'm already here so $60 is good right??