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Old 01-18-2015, 03:39 PM   #76
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We make more money selling them separately?
Remember the company motto/ mission statement?

We are not here just to fuck you, we want to help.
I am trying to say bobbleheads, purses, tee shirt and dolls with the exception of Bonn11 do not fullfill that statement.

I have incorporated the BONN11 Dildo and fleshlight into many products and we are drilling a couple of holes in the Aphrodite doll to install the same components in it as the BONN11 Alien "Signature" items. It is not going well as the bitch's legs are squeezed together like a fucking rock requiring an unrealistic mounting position. I do not expect much from the improvements as, to the touch, she is "cold as ice" The fleshlights would have to be removed and warmed. In Bonn11's anal ass piping tests, she gets frigid as a block of marble after just a few moments of commencing the pounding even after preheating. To top that: Being that cold, it would be a constant reminder our customers of past and present wives! Just not a good thing.
Bonn and I agree that we should just get a blow up doll and glue a gold sponge shaped like an apple in it's hand and we would have a more viable product to bring to market.



and with the retrofitting complete. Don't worry some stubble and razor bumps will look it look better.

aphrodite aliensculpture.jpg


We have had a few customer inquiries that did not pertain to egocentric wants but for help with real issues.

Here are the questions:
1- When my Monger shoots his load it always gets in my hair, eyes and ruins my make up making me look at least 10 years older that stated in my profile. It is just bad for reviews.

2- I have two problems. the first is that I cannot contain my laughter when certain Mongers drop trow. I am afraid to ask if they are growers but some of these guys, Pyramider for example, cannot be seen up close no less at a distance. the second it that with just a little stimulation they cum all over my face even before I try to suck on the toothpick they call a dick. Can you give me a solution as I need to see what I am doing, protect my eyes and somehow stop laughing. It is embarrassing as in able to clean him up I am constantly pointing to where it should be and laughing. Not good as these guys are an important part of my business and if I could stop laughing they would pay GPS rates as I hear my problem is common in the hobby.

My department is working closely with a banned provider who is working in R+D and I will be announcing solutions to these concerns within 24 hours
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Old 01-18-2015, 05:20 PM   #77
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Remember the company motto/ mission statement?

We are not here just to fuck you, we want to help.

In response to our customers needs and concerns we are happy to announce the newest items to enter our testing program before offering it to the general public at our regularly outrageous prices


We have had a few customer inquiries that did not pertain to egocentric wants but for help with real issues.

Here are the questions:
1- When my Monger shoots his load it always gets in my hair, eyes and ruins my make up making me look at least 10 years older that stated in my profile. It is just bad for reviews.

Thank you for you question. Yes we listened and developed this product just for you. This 16oz spray bottle of BSC CUMFREE Freeze Dry Solution has a pump sprayer and a 1/16 ID pinpoint hose to get to exactly where that nasty spunk has been deposited.
This is how it works, say you have just had a blow and go and you have another in 5 minutes and you don't have time to gargle(with mouthwash) you can just attach the BSC Cumfree pin point spray adapter to the BSC Cumfree sprayer and spray the cum on your face and hair with BSC CUMFREE and it will set just as hard as if if it were left in your hair or on your face overnight. Just take a pair of tweezers or needle nose pliers (ok or a pair of wire dikes in case it was a big load) and either pull it off or break it in to a fine powder. it's just that easy. it must be applies when CUM is fresh or you will need to apply our BSC CUM Restorer before freeze drying. This product works great for quick drying finger nails and toenails

Attachment 384577

after and before freeze dry




2- I have two problems. the first is that I cannot contain my laughter when certain Mongers drop trow. I am afraid to ask if they are growers but some of these guys, Pyramider for example, cannot be seen up close no less at a distance. the second it that with just a little stimulation they cum all over my face even before I try to suck on the toothpick they call a dick. Can you give me a solution as I need to see what I am doing, protect my eyes and somehow stop laughing. It is embarrassing as in able to clean him up I am constantly pointing to where it should be and laughing. Not good as these guys are an important part of my business and if I could stop laughing they would pay GPS rates as I hear my problem is common in the hobby.
This has always been a provider problem but Pyramider has certainly done a lot to hobbyists aware of the many problems of " toothpick" dick as you call it.

I have 2 products that may be of interest to you.
1st. The damm I don't remember it being that big tri pupose eyewear. These fashionable, yet durable optical products provides all the features you asked for, eye protection, plus short and long range capabilities. Just set these lightweight glasses over your ears and let then gently rest on your nose and you will be able to see small objects both up close and far away and by adjusting the control on the temple be able to focus on anything at any distance making it appear larger. We at BSC designed this approach to providers behavioral patterns of hysterical fits of pointing and laughing by making the "toothpick" look bigger at any distance while providing for adequate eye protection as a value added feature. We agree you still may need to snicker or point but our tests show remarkable improvements toward reducing this behavior.



2nd. This is for those really tough cares of "toothpick" cawk that we hear of from both regular and banned hobbyists. These cases require 20X magnification and bright lighting. The new BSC needle in a haystack jewelers glasses will be perfect for you with 2 20x lenses and 2 brigght LED bulbs you will be able to find the most ellusive pecker even in the dark.




My department has working closely with a banned provider working in R+D lab and we will be announcing prices and availability after we get done trying to shove a fleshlight into the ass of a statue of Aphrodite. Thank you for your loyalty to BARSHIT CRAZY home of Mongers who want to fuck you and products that help.
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Old 01-18-2015, 06:45 PM   #78
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Do they help with tunnel vision?
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Old 01-18-2015, 07:36 PM   #79
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Do they help with tunnel vision?
Not tunnel vision but until someone else proves otherwise we can support that they do treat Optical Rectumitus* and


* STD resulting from the optical nerves emitting the same electric impulses as
a person's ass. Prognosis: Shitty outlook on life

Does not treat but does help prevention of stds such as Optical Chlamydia and Optical Herpes, or Cranial Rectumitus

I will update the sales broshures.
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Old 01-19-2015, 05:46 AM   #80
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Not tunnel vision but until someone else proves otherwise we can support that they do treat Optical Rectumitus* and


* STD resulting from the optical nerves emitting the same electric impulses as
a person's ass. Prognosis: Shitty outlook on life

Does not treat but does help prevention of stds such as Optical Chlamydia and Optical Herpes, or Cranial Rectumitus

I will update the sales broshures.
We should market these to the Medical industry. Obviously they will help identify SUIT'S. No not what we wear when we're go to a meeting... SUIT"S is an EFN acronym for "SOMETHING UP IN THERE".

Just think of how much easier "my" / "our" work would be....

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Old 01-19-2015, 01:03 PM   #81
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We make more money selling them separately?
Nope.... Have you checked preorders? 3 want refunds for THINKING about ordering "goddess" version....

Let R&D drill a hole in the ass to accommodate the Bonn11 Blue monster cosk nad mark up the normal box a buck so we can unload the inventory you already committed us to.... At least it came deeply discounted ordering a torso without the holes....
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Old 01-19-2015, 03:55 PM   #82
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Nope.... Have you checked preorders? 3 want refunds for THINKING about ordering "goddess" version....

Let R&D drill a hole in the ass to accommodate the Bonn11 Blue monster cosk nad mark up the normal box a buck so we can unload the inventory you already committed us to.... At least it came deeply discounted ordering a torso without the holes....
Good point boss. This just in....



Whispers / The Godfather
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Old 01-19-2015, 04:03 PM   #83
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Good point boss. This just in....



Whispers / The Godfather

What? I can't be immortalized in the Troll Collection?

That looks like a VooDoo doll....

What are you trying to do to me here?
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Old 01-19-2015, 04:36 PM   #84
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What? I can't be immortalized in the Troll Collection?

That looks like a VooDoo doll....

What are you trying to do to me here?
When the ring comes in... you'll love it! Maybe you can forget about the briefcase?
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Old 01-19-2015, 05:06 PM   #85
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What? I can't be immortalized in the Troll Collection?

That looks like a VooDoo doll....

What are you trying to do to me here?
Me's thinks it could double as a kitchen hot pad/ pot holder. No disrespect sir.
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Old 01-19-2015, 05:14 PM   #86
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Me's thinks it could double as a kitchen hot pad/ pot holder. No disrespect sir.


BAT SHIT CRAZY pot holders in the likeness of your favorite hobbyist or provider. were going to be rich.
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Old 01-19-2015, 05:54 PM   #87
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When the ring comes in... you'll love it! Maybe you can forget about the briefcase?
Bring the ring tomorrow night. And don't forget Bob.

and more Cannoli
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Old 01-19-2015, 06:13 PM   #88
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Bring the ring tomorrow night. And don't forget Bob.

and more Cannoli
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Old 01-19-2015, 07:18 PM   #89
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Nope.... Have you checked preorders? 3 want refunds for THINKING about ordering "goddess" version....

Let R&D drill a hole in the ass to accommodate the Bonn11 Blue monster cosk nad mark up the normal box a buck so we can unload the inventory you already committed us to.... At least it came deeply discounted ordering a torso without the holes....
With all due respect it should be Stupid products Improvements project.


RandB Fan
Dept head, BCS's Stupid Products Improvement Dept. (SPID)

But if R+D want to drill holes in a some dead Grecian bitch's faux marble enshrined ass because the Chinese took a cost cutting measure and our procurement department didn't research and seek to verify/correct the specifications we desired. They failed to read the reviews, get written and verbal recommendations, and to scan posts for intel. that proves this was a scam. A torso with no holes is clearly going to show up on someones radar and tee shirts(TOFTT) should have been awarded.
The reviews from this companies other handle(s) clearly indicated that BBFS allowed but not a single shred of hearsay suggesting that she did indeed offer "greek" tours. Offering "faux" Greek after such an disappointing ISO is like putting lipstick on a pig.

The first product make us look weak and now a board Hoogar is talking about competition all because of our first attempt to market such a POS product that clearly has an unreceptive audience.
A sex doll with no holes? Who's fucking idea was such a thing anyway? Who signed off on it or did some hoogar make one of our founders... Ah shit. Our ranks have been infiltrated.



As stated in previous report I feel it is better to just let the dead product be recycled into parts for other products items such as a marble hanging loop for our beloved Godfather understuffed doll/ pot holders. I would rather make cock rings or even napkin rings out of them than to spoil our already cum stained reputation for quality by beating this dead horse. To say it bluntly: Even a geek who is studying Greek and Roman studies would have no interest in dry humping an stone cold piece of faux marble when God Of War 3's sex scenes are free on youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0t5-1_bIobo


If you, as a group, are dead set on selling a faux marble partial body casting to our loyal BSC customers, it is your call sir. But with all due respect,I feel that R+D should get the job of drilling the initial hole but we (SPID) should install the Bonn11 alien fleshlite units and preform further quality assurance tests before offering it for sale as a new and improved version.

I find it interesting that, according to mythology, Aphrodite's father was Uranus, (yep,I said Uranus) and you thought you're dad was an ass, who's castrated testicles were thrown into the ocean, she arose from the sea's foam.

With all due respect,

RandB Fan
Deparment Director, Stupid products Improvement
"If we can fix RONCO's GHL, we can fix anything!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GeF7A05zQ8
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Old 01-19-2015, 07:36 PM   #90
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Hey your Grecian bitch looks like she has syphilis?
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