Well, I'll be damned...

[Charlie Brown]

OP, you know your true situation better than anyone and no disrespect is meant in my comments. I do think you should consider some of the warnings above.

It is great you have a good relationship with your wife.

Now, let's do this - tell the wife - " honey, it's OK for you to play around as long as your safe " ! " We'll just make it fair all around. "

What made you say such a thing? Doubt it was actually the beers. Was it really because of your sex drives being different ? Were you really trying to let her know how much you love her ?

The mind set to say that kind of thing - not likely it came up initially in this conversation.

[Tiffani Jameson]

Originally Posted by Extreme

Trick
I had a lot of female friends, yes just friends. But my girlfriends friends kept telling her they saw me with different girls in car, club, restaurant, ect.....
She told them she didn't care
"as long as I was home in bed every night"
She even then stated this to me when I asked!
I thought I had a pass and started banging friends of my friends

BUSTED: I didn't have a pass she only said that to get her friends off her ass
She trusted me 100% I hurt her and felt like shit
Bottom line if you cheat
Make sure it's with someone who has just as much to loose as you!
Or
Pay em and be done
Make sure you don't get caught

If your girlfriend has people running to her telling her about just friends and she's defending you, why would you make her look so stupid? I would have kicked your ass to the curb too.

Listen. We can't control what you do with your dick when you're not in our presence. The only thing that keeps a man faithful is his conscience. The only thing that's expected of a man whose nature overwhelms his conscience is to at least get good at hiding bad behavior. You deliberately let yourself be seen being disrespectful means you didn't care if she knew.

To the OP, your wife is a smart woman who knows she'd give herself a headache trying to control you. All she can hope is that took love her enough to not bring her any venereal gifts, additional children and have enough scruples not to get too close to home (family and friends).

Be safe, darling!

[nicholas linnear]

An interesting conundrum.....my girlfriend happens to be a working girl. If you knew she had a boyfriend that wasn't overjoyed at reading how much you enjoyed her sucking your dick, would you feel uncomfortable fucking her again? Or write it up as she made a choice to sell her body and I made a choice to be with a woman whom sells her body?

She says she doesn't consider herself to be cheating, since she only wants the money and the hour to end.
And she DOES NOT want me seeing other women....things that make you go hmmm...

[Luke Skywalker]

Hey Nick. I have news for you. You are a pimp. Loser.

That is my opinion.

[nicholas linnear]

I assume if you come home and find your lawn guys dick in your wife's mouth it's just as okay as you fucking around? She's not in love with himshe just wants that cock. Are you saying a working girl is sub human and not allowed a " normal" relationship or that any man that loves a working girl is a pimp? You are really showing your ass and what you think about women in general if so...I hope your lawn guy is allowed cim

[Jake B]

Originally Posted by erotic.lashell

I must interject this thread. I am going to be positive. I am a non jealous woman. I allowed my husband. (Soon to be ex) to go and do as he pleased as long as he told me about it. I find it erotic. One night he came home from work and i said. Xxx was waiting at her house for him. He didn't believe me. I text her, she called him, He went and had fun all night. Then came back and we played while he told me about it. Some women (me) think like men. I don't play games, I'm not jealous, and sex is on my mind 24/7. This is why i love this job.

You are a rare breed my dear, and technically we still have not met...yet

[Luke Skywalker]

Originally Posted by nicholas linnear

I assume if you come home and find your lawn guys dick in your wife's mouth it's just as okay as you fucking around? She's not in love with himshe just wants that cock. Are you saying a working girl is sub human and not allowed a " normal" relationship or that any man that loves a working girl is a pimp? You are really showing your ass and what you think about women in general if so...I hope your lawn guy is allowed cim

I apologize calling you a loser. Is just that I don't have a lot of patience with pimps. That is what I addressing to you in my original reply.

[ElisabethWhispers]

Originally Posted by erotic.lashell

I must interject this thread. I am going to be positive. I am a non jealous woman. I allowed my husband. (Soon to be ex) to go and do as he pleased as long as he told me about it. I find it erotic. One night he came home from work and i said. Xxx was waiting at her house for him. He didn't believe me. I text her, she called him, He went and had fun all night. Then came back and we played while he told me about it. Some women (me) think like men. I don't play games, I'm not jealous, and sex is on my mind 24/7. This is why i love this job.

Is this the same LaShell who was gracious and kind to me when I was a relative newbie? If so, I'd like to welcome you back to the fold. If there is anything that I can do for you to assist with getting back in the game, please let me know.

Otherwise, I agree with what you wrote (which remembering back when, doesn't surprised me). I do believe that a woman can have a meaningful and mature relationship without jealousy being a huge factor.

I've had a few clients, who I respect a great deal, who have had a similar type of "understanding" with their significant others. I find this attitude to be progressive and actually, pretty wonderful.

I would hope that if I ever find myself in a long term relationship, that I could have a similar understanding with my loved one.

Historically, couples have had understandings like this forever. I don't know why anyone is questioning the motives of someone that they do not know.

Give the guy the benefit of the doubt. And wish him well.

Guilt is the cancer of life. It's wonderful to hear of someone who has been able to shed some of that inner crap that we all suffer from.

Best,
Elisabeth

[doug_dfw]

Originally Posted by macbeth1000

It's a fucking trick, it's either she wants you to confess by telling you such things are ok, or she already fucking someone else or she planning to divorce you and wants you to sin and confess. Unless and until she brings another female into your bed even then you must still say "honey, I am not comfortable with another woman in our bed because I love only you and took a vow to be with only you but if this is what you want then I am doing it for you"
Be very careful, rarely are women not the jealous and vindictive type

My advice too. I got suckered baited by a wife of 17 years who not only wanted a divorce but was fucking the guy she wanted to marry and did. Half of my estate down the drain whne she dropped the divorce papers with her secretly taped of my admission. Be smart. No admissions. Be careful.

[Laura Lynn]

She may actually mean it while she is saying it. But as an ex-wife who said something very similar to my ex-husband, I cannot even begin to say how less than happy I was and how less than understanding i was when he confessed the things that he had done.

If her words lessen your guilt, then that's great. But I would say do not admit anything, it'll only bite you in the ass later.

[Tiffani Jameson]

Originally Posted by Laura Lynn

She may actually mean it while she is saying it. But as an ex-wife who said something very similar to my ex-husband, I cannot even begin to say how less than happy I was and how less than understanding i was when he confessed the things that he had done.

If her words lessen your guilt, then that's great. But I would say do not admit anything, it'll only bite you in the ass later.

This!

Just because we're not looking for trouble doesn't mean we're okay with it...

[planojim]

Friendly suggestion: Have her put it in writing and get it signed and notarized before playing around dude!

Originally Posted by sleastak

My wife of 20 years and I had a few beers and got to talking about what we considered cheating. We have a great relationship but never really had THAT conversation. Yadda, yadda, yadda and come to find out her only concern is that I play safely. She understands our sex drives are different.

I've only ever done a few L1 type things over the years, and that's the level I'll keep it at. But now I can do away with the massive self-imposed guilt trip. We are in love as much as ever and in a weird way this has strengthened our relationship.

Not exactly sure what my point is here. I guess if others have similar experiences.

[Don't Be Daft!]

Perhaps not subhuman but....

Silly bollocks dating a slag.


http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=K3sYhqGtBRo

Originally Posted by nicholas linnear

I assume if you come home and find your lawn guys dick in your wife's mouth it's just as okay as you fucking around? She's not in love with himshe just wants that cock. Are you saying a working girl is sub human and not allowed a " normal" relationship or that any man that loves a working girl is a pimp? You are really showing your ass and what you think about women in general if so...I hope your lawn guy is allowed cim

[RideFreeInTexas]

My wife (now ex) told me almost the exact same thing. She told me more than once that she didn't mind if I fooled around, but if I did then she didn't want to know about it. Ironically I had zero interest in doing so. I was monogamous to her right up until she left me, 26 years with one woman. I never even kissed another woman. Anyway, towards the end of our marriage when things were still OK she told me I better not mess around on her or she would fuck me over good. I was surprised, I told her "I've never done that and never will, but didn't you always tell me that you didn't care if I did, just not to tell you about it?" She said "Yeah, I don't know what I was thinking." So just be warned, she may have told you that today but it doesn't mean she'll feel that way tomorrow.

[b2pop]

Never fall for the oh it's ok BS. It's a trick and even if it is sincere at first it will end in disaster. She will get jealous of something EX. Oh yeah you going to see your whore again. Oh she does that better than me. What does she look like? Really you think she is better than me. Even if she initiates the behavior you have to walk a fine line. If she brought her best friend home and wanted you to fuck her you better never tell her how really awesome that was. She'll use it against you. Rarely do monogamous relationships open up and remain the same. Never say never but you are walking a fine line. What if she wants to fuck the pool boy next month. How would you feel about that? I believe in the old Eddie Murphy rule don't admit an always deny.