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The Sandbox - New Orleans The Sandbox is a collection of off-topic discussions. Humorous threads, Sports talk, and a wide variety of other topics can be found here. If it's NOT an adult-themed topic, then it belongs here

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Old 04-02-2013, 11:42 AM   #1
Brmike1963
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Smile Weight loss program

A guy calls a company and orders their 5-day/10-lb. weight loss program. The next day, there's a knock on the door and there stands before him a voluptuous, athletic Lisa Lyonz dressed in nothing but a pair of Nike running shoes and a sign around her neck. She introduces herself as a representative of the weight loss company.

The sign reads,"If you can catch me, you can have me." Without a second thought, he takes off after her.

A few miles later, huffing and puffing, he finally catches her and has his way with her.

Lisa shows up for the next four days and the same thing happens.

On the fifth day, he weighs himself and is delighted to find he has lost 10 lbs. as promised.

He calls the company and orders their 5-day/20-lb. program. The next day there's a knock at the door and there stands Lovely Lolita, She is wearing nothing but Reebok running shoes and a sign around her neck that reads, "If you catch me, you can have me."

Well, he's out the door after her like a shot.

It takes him a while to catch her, but when he does, it's definitely worth every muscle cramp and wheeze. So, for the next four days, the same routine happens. Much to his delight, on the fifth day he weighs himself only to discover that he has lost another 20 lbs. as promised.

He decides to go for broke and calls the company to order the 7-day/50 pound program.

"Are you sure?" asks the representative on the phone. "This is our most rigorous program."

"Absolutely," he replies. "I haven't felt this good in years."

The next day there's a knock at the door; and when he opens it he finds Avarni and Ilovedatass standing there wearing nothing but pink running shoes and a sign around his neck that reads, "If We catch you, you're ass is ours. "

He lost 63 lbs that week!
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Old 04-02-2013, 12:55 PM   #2
brownfish
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thats the most hilarious joke ive ever heard !!!!!!!
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Old 04-02-2013, 02:28 PM   #3
mriley000
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And I look good too!! It was not easy out running ILDA and Averni. Excellent Mike!! If you want to get 6-week credit, you will need to give a bit more details in the ROS section for once LLL and LL were caught.
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Old 04-02-2013, 02:35 PM   #4
brownfish
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lol ..it keeps getting better ...
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Old 04-02-2013, 07:49 PM   #5
eholiday
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Lol. I never really stop in the Sandbox and read, but I'm glad I did this evening!
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Old 04-02-2013, 08:58 PM   #6
ilovedatass
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Lmfao !
Here's some actual footage captured by TV10 of us in pursuit

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Old 04-02-2013, 10:50 PM   #7
brownfish
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Old 04-03-2013, 07:17 AM   #8
Old Horn Dog
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NIIIIICE!
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Old 04-03-2013, 09:39 AM   #9
L.T. Watson
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lol good job
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Old 04-03-2013, 03:19 PM   #10
LA Man
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That's a good laugh! Well worded joke!!!
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Old 04-04-2013, 07:23 AM   #11
Arverni
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It's not gay if it's a three-way!

Something like this actually happened to me once in Chin Hae, South Korea - except I was the one being chased. I got chased by five gay guys who were pissed off at the girl I was with (she was mouthing off to them in a club and I guess in Korea if you're a man you're supposed to control your women). I think I could've taken them - but then I started thinking ... "what exactly is the PENALTY for losing a fight with five gay guys?"

They didn't catch me! LMAO!!
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Old 04-04-2013, 07:27 AM   #12
ilovedatass
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Lol how much did you lose ?
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Old 04-04-2013, 10:02 AM   #13
Max Steed
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Awesome Joke!!
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Old 04-04-2013, 12:59 PM   #14
Arverni
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ilovedatass View Post
Lol how much did you lose ?
Didn't lose any weight but I lost that girl!
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Old 04-04-2013, 03:55 PM   #15
ManOnAMission
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Arverni View Post
Didn't lose any weight but I lost that girl!
So was that about 98#
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