Any of you girls

[Sellysell]

ever leave stuff behind at an outcall? Like shoes, underthings, toys, what have you? That seems like it would suck for everyone! haha!

[MissMeghan]

Who the hell would do that? So freaking disrespectful and messy!

[tarangtarang]

Something opposite happened in my case.

I was with this provider, a spinner in Austin, 9 months back. At her pretty first floor condo in central austin. After some CBJ, realized she was out of cover. I quickly put on my trouser without underwear or socks, and stepped out (to the driveway) to get the condom. Grabbed it, and came back to the door to find it closed.

A barrage of text from the provider came, saying her bf is coming to get her, and I should leave. Her son is also sick, so she is busy. she has had a change of heart and she is not doing this anymore. she is on her periods and not feeling good. Yes, all the 4 above reasons in 2-3 minute window.

Coming back to the original question, I did not "forget", but was cheated out of my donation, and more so, of my $1 fruit of the loom underwear and some torn socks. Wish you had a great time with it sweetie (if you are reading this).

[Toyz]

Tarantarang,

What you have experienced are some of the "Top Ten Reasons Hookers Flake" Its a best seller for 50 years and includes copious quantities of advice, discussions, epiphanies...I am never caught off guard by a provider flake, cause I KNOW the reasons! I EXPECT a flake out, so when one doesnt flake out, I am plesantly surprised.

However...I have taken a few moments out of my mini vacation in Galveston to edu-ma-cate you on the TOP TEN REASONS GIVEN FOR HOOKER FLAKAGE:


1). She is on her periods and not feeling good (It's funny you said PERIODS-because Hookers are the only females who can have MULTIPLE periods every month. They can also start without warning in a mere matter of seconds-or end just as quickly. Most DON'T have periods the last 3 and first 3 days of each month). This is also covered under "visiting Aunt".

2). Her son is also sick. So is her daughter. They are terminal death bed cases at any time. Take pity on them, cause it has to suck being ill so very often. Its one reason Whispers and the other guys on the board have their charity every year for "Sick Hookers Kids"...its a terrible tradgedy, won't you give today?

3). Car/Vehicle/Driver is fucking DEAD! Hooker cars are used cars that the clowns use in the circus...the little ones where 13 clowns pile out? (imagine the smell from all those chili dinners). They are notorious for breaking 20 minutes before your meeting...roughly 5 minutes into your trip.

4). Dead Gramma. Hookers have multiple grandparents. They are all sick & die randomly (generally with no warning...just working in the roses and {{{SMACK}}} massive heart attack. Some have been known to re-animate allowing them to die multiple times

5). Locked out of incall. Lost keys, can't find them. Looked all over. Not sure if they are up her ass our not as the last session included toys.

6). Lost or broken phone & couldnt call you to let you know I was flaking-so I NCNS. This actually might have a higer ranking & has happened to me on occasion. HOOKERPHONZ are a lower grade than the ones everyone else uses. They simply only work on occasion. (Usually the first three days before & after rent is due). Its a phenomena not explained easily & can probably be blamed on gremlins living inside the phone.

7). Her bf is coming to get her. , so she is busy. BF's show up at odd times. And sometimes actually DO show up. And of course, none of them know what she is doing to get all that money...she tells them she got a ton of tips on the shift, that their Grandma (pre death throes) gives her tons of money...

8). Urinary tract infarction-Also known as "burning pussy syndrome". This one works on me...being with a girl that is flinching before you even get the head in is generally not much fun. Also, if you smell a strong scent of "wheat & barley" it might be time to reel that tongue back in for a bit.

9). INCALL FLOODED-Normally caused by numbers of condoms clogging up the commode causing massive water backup which indeed DOES flood the incall. Also, categorize as broken heater/AC/Hole in Wall caused by neighbors tired of hearing screams all night.

10). she has had a change of heart and she is not doing this anymore. Yes, all the 4 above reasons in 2-3 minute window. Many hookers have a change of heart. Most times this is prefaced by a one month "fuck me as much as you want" in order to save enough for spring break, or that vacation, non-clown infested car upgrade, operation to save Grandma from dying again...

[tarangtarang]

Originally Posted by Toyz

Tarantarang,

What you have experienced are some of the "Top Ten Reasons Hookers Flake" Its a best seller for 50 years and includes copious quantities of advice, discussions, epiphanies...I am never caught off guard by a provider flake, cause I KNOW the reasons! I EXPECT a flake out, so when one doesnt flake out, I am plesantly surprised.

However...I have taken a few moments out of my mini vacation in Galveston to edu-ma-cate you on the TOP TEN REASONS GIVEN FOR HOOKER FLAKAGE:


1). She is on her periods and not feeling good (It's funny you said PERIODS-because Hookers are the only females who can have MULTIPLE periods every month. They can also start without warning in a mere matter of seconds-or end just as quickly. Most DON'T have periods the last 3 and first 3 days of each month). This is also covered under "visiting Aunt".

2). Her son is also sick. So is her daughter. They are terminal death bed cases at any time. Take pity on them, cause it has to suck being ill so very often. Its one reason Whispers and the other guys on the board have their charity every year for "Sick Hookers Kids"...its a terrible tradgedy, won't you give today?

3). Car/Vehicle/Driver is fucking DEAD! Hooker cars are used cars that the clowns use in the circus...the little ones where 13 clowns pile out? (imagine the smell from all those chili dinners). They are notorious for breaking 20 minutes before your meeting...roughly 5 minutes into your trip.

4). Dead Gramma. Hookers have multiple grandparents. They are all sick & die randomly (generally with no warning...just working in the roses and {{{SMACK}}} massive heart attack. Some have been known to re-animate allowing them to die multiple times

5). Locked out of incall. Lost keys, can't find them. Looked all over. Not sure if they are up her ass our not as the last session included toys.

6). Lost or broken phone & couldnt call you to let you know I was flaking-so I NCNS. This actually might have a higer ranking & has happened to me on occasion. HOOKERPHONZ are a lower grade than the ones everyone else uses. They simply only work on occasion. (Usually the first three days before & after rent is due). Its a phenomena not explained easily & can probably be blamed on gremlins living inside the phone.

7). Her bf is coming to get her. , so she is busy. BF's show up at odd times. And sometimes actually DO show up. And of course, none of them know what she is doing to get all that money...she tells them she got a ton of tips on the shift, that their Grandma (pre death throes) gives her tons of money...

8). Urinary tract infarction-Also known as "burning pussy syndrome". This one works on me...being with a girl that is flinching before you even get the head in is generally not much fun. Also, if you smell a strong scent of "wheat & barley" it might be time to reel that tongue back in for a bit.

9). INCALL FLOODED-Normally caused by numbers of condoms clogging up the commode causing massive water backup which indeed DOES flood the incall. Also, categorize as broken heater/AC/Hole in Wall caused by neighbors tired of hearing screams all night.

10). she has had a change of heart and she is not doing this anymore. Yes, all the 4 above reasons in 2-3 minute window. Many hookers have a change of heart. Most times this is prefaced by a one month "fuck me as much as you want" in order to save enough for spring break, or that vacation, non-clown infested car upgrade, operation to save Grandma from dying again...

That is a nice collection! My all time favorite is when someone on BP claiming to be british redhead gave reason 2) above and starting giving me morality lessens about her motherly duty being more important than her job.

[homer13]

I'm not a lady but I did just leave a bunch of cum at nice young ladies place. I also left some booze.
That's a boom goes the dynamite.

Goodnight everyone, be safe