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The Sandbox-South Texas The Sandbox is a collection of off-topic discussions. Humorous threads, Sports talk, and a wide variety of other topics can be found here. If it's NOT an adult-themed topic, then it belongs here

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Old 01-15-2013, 10:55 AM   #1
christos62
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Default Phrases you wanted to utter when confronted with a not so hot provider

Guys, have you ever had a date with a provider that was not so hot after you took of her clothes? Did you want to head for the hills after seeing her in all her splendor?

How did you handle the situation? Did you actually utter one of the following phrases?


  • "Oh, gee, you have so many wrinkles!"
  • You look nothing like your ad."
  • "You'd be so pretty if you lost weight."
  • "Huh -- I thought you looked younger with clothes on."
  • "I like firmer butts and perkier breasts."
  • "Do you have a refund policy?"
  • "Uh, I gotta go now."
  • "Let me go get my condom from my car"
  • "I refuse to be the victim of bait-and-switch!"
Did she slap you? Or did you go all out and faked a heart attack?
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Old 01-19-2013, 01:48 PM   #2
slider22
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Ive said, "This isnt going to work"
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Old 01-23-2013, 08:02 AM   #3
Mr. Smith111
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I bet you were something back in the 80's.

Do we wear the same pants size?

Have you ever thought about waxing?

How are your grandkids?

Would you care for a mint?

Would you mind taking a shower?

When do you get your new teeth?

Please leave the light off.

I don't think I need the whole hour.

Who was that walking out as I was about to knock?
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Old 01-23-2013, 07:35 PM   #4
capitan1962
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You should remember me from when you taught me in 5th grade.

How did that happen?

I need to go to my car, I forgot my phone.

Photoshop really is amazing.

What NFL team did you play for.

You know Pookie really isn't so bad.

What club do you dance at?

Do you know Mr. Smith?

How long ago was he here?
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Old 01-23-2013, 07:38 PM   #5
Fedexpilot
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--> Sorry, I don't do chicks with ankle monitors.
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Old 01-23-2013, 10:49 PM   #6
redd19
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Did you eat the other girl?
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Old 01-24-2013, 08:03 AM   #7
wildwooly1
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When a provider advertises no smoking !
Did you just take up smoking or have you been standing over a burning trash barrel?
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Old 02-12-2013, 04:36 PM   #8
italia
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wow smh you guys are hilarious and mean all at the same time lol
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Old 02-12-2013, 05:15 PM   #9
Mr. Smith111
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Quote:
Originally Posted by italia View Post
wow smh you guys are hilarious and mean all at the same time lol
I'm sure you ladies could have a field day with a thread like this.. LMAO
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Old 02-12-2013, 09:21 PM   #10
capitan1962
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Well if you try to sell chicken salad don't fill it with horse shit.
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Old 02-14-2013, 11:17 PM   #11
slim deez
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That is when I wish the big ugly pimp would bust out of the closet so I have a reason to get the hell out.
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Old 02-16-2013, 07:31 AM   #12
Guest032716
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I thought I had posted this one. Hope I never have to use it.

I hope that's a gun in your pocket and not from being glad to see me
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Old 02-16-2013, 11:15 PM   #13
rjdiner
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Well normally I'd stick around but the opera needs their fat lady to sing so you're free to go.
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Old 02-20-2013, 11:01 AM   #14
Guest032716
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Are the pictures on your website, your daughter's?

Were your pictures taken before the turn of the Century?

I'd like to hear what the ladies would like to say to some of us guys! Like:

Did you say you had a reduction operation on your penis? I'm having trouble finding it!
Would you mind shaving, brushing your teath and taking a shower before we proceed?
We better stick to doggie, I don't think I can get my legs around your hips!
I'd love to suck your balls if you'd shave your junk! (I actually had a girl say that)
Did you say you've been cleaning fish this morning?
Have you ever thought about taking up another hobby?
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Old 02-20-2013, 12:17 PM   #15
forumguy456987
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Quote:
Originally Posted by capitan1962 View Post
You should remember me from when you taught me in 5th grade.
I don't know man...that one is actually a fantasy!
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