Hobby vs. relationship(s).

[nycalcharlie2003]

There is physical intimacy and emotional intimacy. It is best when you have both from the same person.

[Starry69]

[pmdelites]

Originally Posted by Misawahawk

...A thought I always juxtapose is walking along a beach holding hands with a woman you have been married to for 25 years versus banging some hottie 25 years younger. I think in the moment I'd choose the hottie. I hope I'm wrong.

Originally Posted by nycalcharlie2003

There is physical intimacy and emotional intimacy. It is best when you have both from the same person.

+1 on the different kinds of intimacy.
if i could only have one, it be emotional intimacy, hands down.
fortunately, i get emotional intimacy from my partner
and some of my physical intimacy from providers.
mary five fingers gives me the rest.

i'll take a woman i've been committed to for many many moons over a quick "wham bam thank you m'am" [even if it isnt a wham-bam - most of my encounters are not wbtym's].

and i do recognize that many dont get physical or emotional intimacy.
or that some partners/s.os./spouses are real pains in the ass.
guess i've been lucky w/ the woman i'm committee to.


which brings to mind what i learned long ago.....
when it gets bad enough, you probably ought to quit doing it.
in other words, to get our of a hole, quit digging it.

peace!!!

[Starry69]

[blk07lac]

Nothing like being able to rollover in the middle of the night squirt one off and get a turkey sandwich. But I guess if I could afford a different provider 3 times a week I would go that route.

[OLindsay]

Interesting concept about myself wasn't getting what I should of out of an 11 year relationship, so I switched my profession and now I have all that I need and then some. And not one damn person to account too not even my boyfriend.

[nycalcharlie2003]

I agree PM Delites. I have the same sort of situation. What I would add is that with some providers you can be caring, affectionate and to some extent- loving. But there will never be the intimacy you get from an LTR. Of course, part of that is due to barriers that both parties erect to protect themselves.

Originally Posted by pmdelites

+1 on the different kinds of intimacy.
if i could only have one, it be emotional intimacy, hands down.
fortunately, i get emotional intimacy from my partner
and some of my physical intimacy from providers.
mary five fingers gives me the rest.

i'll take a woman i've been committed to for many many moons over a quick "wham bam thank you m'am" [even if it isnt a wham-bam - most of my encounters are not wbtym's].

and i do recognize that many dont get physical or emotional intimacy.
or that some partners/s.os./spouses are real pains in the ass.
guess i've been lucky w/ the woman i'm committee to.


which brings to mind what i learned long ago.....
when it gets bad enough, you probably ought to quit doing it.
in other words, to get our of a hole, quit digging it.

peace!!!

[Guest102513-1]

If you are looking for a fun, business based friendship...it's great when you can connect with someone in the hobby

If someone is even using the word "relationship" in hobbyland, much less looking for a relationship...I would strongly suggest a Match.com membership would be in order

[nycalcharlie2003]

Originally Posted by vkmaster

If you are looking for a fun, business based friendship...it's great when you can connect with someone in the hobby

If someone is even using the word "relationship" in hobbyland, much less looking for a relationship...I would strongly suggest a Match.com membership would be in order

+1

Most of us in the hobby are here because we already have relationships, imperfect though they are. We aren't looking for anything other than 1 or 2 hour "relationships"

[JRLawrence]

Originally Posted by bigryan222

It all depends on what you want in life.

Most of this is right. Been there with wives. Done that with girls.

From my first wife I got children, which are the greatest joy of my life. Family is first. I lost my first wife. The worst thing I could do was jump into another relationship for several years. The kids were first, not my needs. Sex can be purchased for a moment, and it feels good; it is not a relationship. I became friends with several ladies; but know that it is not a commitment that brings with it a wider connection with the family.

I got married a second time, and she died. More family. That was great. Now how do I fulfill my needs without hurting families one and two. It is a wonder how many women are out there for free when you are an employed successful male. The girls are lined up at the door. The job is to turn them down if it can't lead to a good family relationship. Find a nice woman who you are comfortable with and pay for the experience. Keep in mind that many of the free ladies, want a lot more from you. Wait for a relationship until you find a lady who is truly your friend and a help for your needs. A good relationship is what we all want.

10 year later, I found a third wife and no longer had the need for paying, when I had everything I needed and a third family at home. She now needs my help and care, but for the first time I have a wife who doesn't give sex, and I don't try with her. Understand; sex and love are not the same. It is just a good thing that I don't need it as much as when I was younger. But, it is still nice, as long as someone doesn't get hurt. By someone, I mean: my children, my stepchildren, my three sets of inlaws and their families, my family, and the girls I see.

The one thing I do not understand about the hobby; those who want to hurt others, control the women, not honor their agreements, or try to find out the details of my personal life for their own gain.

No one should allow themselves to be used; not the ladies, and not the men. Life is too short for that type of behavior. If you find a bad apple in a barrel, quickly pick it out and throw it away. We just don't believe in keeping a bad apple in my life.

I think most women can be a lot of fun; married to them, or not. Women have always brought me joy.

Have fun, and enjoy life.

JR

[royamcr]

One more and you can do the Four Christmases thing.

[Misawahawk]

My wife ran away with my best friend. I sure do miss him.

[OLindsay]

Originally Posted by Misawahawk

My wife ran away with my best friend. I sure do miss him.

I have a story to share with you during our next meeting babe what a great conversation for us to discuss .
Xoxo,
Lindsay

[burton46]

The only thing I remember about marriage was that 4 play was a half hour of begging. I asked my wife once what I could do to satisfy her and he said "introduce me to some of your friends".

[pmdelites]

Originally Posted by OLindsay

Interesting concept about myself wasn't getting what I should of out of an 11 year relationship, so I switched my profession and now I have all that I need and then some. And not one damn person to account too not even my boyfriend.

i must be missing something here...

what did the 11 yr relationship have to do w/ your profession at the time?

i can see getting out of a LTR cos one isnt getting what they want.
i can see changing professions cos one isnt getting what they want.

so, were you referring to your profession when you mentioned the 11yr relationship.

just wondering.....