What to do in the event of extortion?

[Guest062716]

In a hypothetical situation, where you have contacted a provider, made an appointment, had a session for which you left a full donation and for whatever reason, decided not to see her again.....

What could/should you do, if she has recorded all of your real world info and has sent threatening communication to you, your family, your employer and/or is demanding money?

Interested in hearing thoughts from both the ladies and the gents.

Let me state that I understand and support the need for good screening by a lady. You are taking a great deal of risk (certainly the majority of risk). I have no issues trusting a lady with whatever details she needs to be comfortable in seeing me.... if I don't want to leave/give those details, then I have the right to walk away and she has the right not to see me.
I know from experience that some ladies make a gent drive past a window so they can see the gent and/or the vehicle. I know from experience some ladies have captured license plate info, when seeing new guys, "just in case" something happens. I have no issue with that and to me, it is part of the risk that I take. A hobby phone, not tied to me, is a means of ensuring one does not have an electronic record/evidence, tying the provider/hobbyist together.

So, with the lady now having possible Real World information, giving her a level of security to see me and a point to start an investigation, should I be a bad guy, what to do, if she uses that info for extortion?

Give me gas money or else!

Take down that review or else!

There need be a level of mutual trust in the hobby, but what to do when the provider threatens the client?


Remain silent, close your eyes, and hope it all goes away?

Post a note about it?

Contact a lawyer or police about it?

Is it ok/when is it ok, to "retaliate"? What level is permitted?

Agreeably, this kind of "abuse" is rare, but frequently has not been uncommon.

What is the gent to do?

YOUR THOUGHTS?

[SimplyGwen]

Oldsarge, thanks for posting this. I have been in/out of this business since 2001 and it's only been since recently that I have seen this extortion and scamming taking place by providers.

You are right that there needs to be a mutual trust in this business, so that everyone feels safe.

I am a "newbie friendly" provider and because of this, I need to collect enough information to verify a gentleman is a safe/well adjusted person before meeting them. I always ask that clients take a thorough look at my history too so that they can feel secure before booking with me or giving me any information . I never pressure anyone to give any information and everyone is free to move on if not comfortable.

I would advise any gentlemen who find themselves in this situation to step up, call LE and report anyone threatening them, otherwise the cycle will continue. You may also be helping to get a criminal element off the streets as well.

[Jennatx]

I think it is straight wrong to threat or out or anything of that nature.
If a lady request certain information it is really up to the gent what he feels comfortable with giving. I maintain a low profile since I move to Austin I do not even post on backpage any longer. I ask for at least one current reference I look at his handle, and a few other things.
In the past I have pm or text a few gents offering specials if I am in a bind and luckily a few of them have been able to help me out.
You know who you are and Thank you muah!!

[enderwiggin]

Timely topic and all are invited to join in. One word of warning though: keep the discussion hypothetical. Specific information about extortion attempts and/or blackmail belong in the Alerts Forum. Threats and discussions of retaliation against specific boardmembers will not be tolerated.

First and only warning.

With regard to the topic at hand, any level of participation in this hobby involves an element of risk. New participants are especially susceptible, as are the reckless. I could care less about the later; if you know some ways to protect yourself and choose to ignore them, you'll likely get what you deserve.

As for the new participants, I always, always recommend they read, read, read. Unfortunately most newbies think with their dicks or their purses, and get themselves into trouble.

As a matter of principle, I will not give a provider my real name, employment info or anything like that for screening. I am an active and proven P411 member and if that's not good enough for her, I pass. If I knew or suspected that anyone I met in the hobby was storing or collecting real world information about me, I would immediately sever all contact with them, advise the board staff that that individual was violating rule #5 of the Forum Guidelines and post an alert in the relevant city forum.

[Guest062716]

Originally Posted by enderwiggin

Timely topic and all are invited to join in. One word of warning though: keep the discussion hypothetical.

Couldn't agree more with you sir, and thanks for pointing that out. There is a reason I started the conversation with the phrase "hypothetical situation". It didn't dawn on me to point out the rationale behind those words.

Originally Posted by enderwiggin

Specific information about extortion attempts and/or blackmail belong in the Alerts Forum. Threats and discussions of retaliation against specific boardmembers will not be tolerated.

Another great point, and the validity of our alerts forum is why it is arguably the most credible alerts forum on the board. We post more hard facts than most and speculation is clearly labeled as such.

Originally Posted by enderwiggin

If I knew or suspected that anyone I met in the hobby was storing or collecting real world information about me, I would immediately sever all contact with them, advise the board staff that that individual was violating rule #5 of the Forum Guidelines and post an alert in the relevant city forum.

Precisely the point I was hoping to hear. Guideline #5

#5 - Outing or threats of outing are taken seriously. Membership here is anonymous and for the privacy of our members it will remain that way. That means any effort or attempt to connect a person's real world information to their username on this board will be dealt with swiftly and harshly. This includes real names, employment, medical info, addresses past or present, images, criminal or driving record, etc. We expect everyone who participates here to respect and go to great lengths to protect the anonymity and privacy of one another. Reckless disregard or accidental outing will also be taken very seriously.

Ladies and gents, should you get an electronic communication with a threat of outing, feel free to copy that info to the moderators here, filing your complaint of a member violating this guideline. Violators have, in my experience, been dealt with swiftly, and in some cases, quite severely. If you are concerned for your safety, you NEED not make a posting about the situation, but I encourage you to PM the mods. (A "'public" warning to others is nice, but not at the sacrifice of your safety).

For those of you that read a warning and say, "hey that happened to me too!" go ahead and PM the mods your experience, as well. The decision by the owners/management, as to the penalties to emplace, depend greatly on the severity of the transgressions. An isolated incident may result in nothing more than a slap on the wrist and/or a couple of points. A widespread incident would be handled with greater severity.

I have no issue with a lady having whatever information I PROVIDE her. That is MY CHOICE to provide, or not to provide that information. If I do not want her to have it, then I simply can move on. I do expect that information to be protected, and never used against me (or in a threat to be used against me). Have I been threatened by providers in the past? YES. The primary reason I voluntarily stepped down as a mod in Austin was due to that mess, a lady upset over the board discipline taken against her. I was threatened with physical harm. (By the way, whenever a mod issues points or infractions, it is documented and the documentation can be seen by all of the other mods on the site, the admins and the owners).

Now, in terms of additional information, we all uncover things incidentally and accidentally, at times. That information is best forgotten and never brought back up.

The question remains this, given that the board can only monitor board activity, is it ok to take action in the hypothetical case of a board member making threats to you outside of the board's purview? If that is ok, then what actions do you recommend and why?

Interesting discussion so far.

Eagerly awaiting more thoughts and ideas....

Respectfully,

OldSarge

[SimplyGwen]

Originally Posted by OldSarge

The question remains this, given that the board can only monitor board activity, is it ok to take action in the hypothetical case of a board member making threats to you outside of the board's purview? If that is ok, then what actions do you recommend and why?

Interesting discussion so far.

Eagerly awaiting more thoughts and ideas....

Respectfully,

OldSarge

I think the board management should take action if it is found that a member is systematically using the board to gain access to the member list for the purpose(s) of committing extortion or scams. Although the contact may have been made by e-mail or cell phone, there is a high likelihood that the member (victim) was initially contacted through the board (or board was used to facilitate contact, such as through previous ads or currently listed reviews). This would be easy to verify if a provider, for example, did not use any other advertising resources to engage with clients and is targeting members to commit acts against.

If the act is widespread, it would seem prudent for the board to welcome information from victimized board members such as previous text messages/e-mails/voicemails in order substantiate the claims against offending members.

To keep offenders on the board, basically says is ok to scam and extort other members and is a slap in the face to providers and members who try to conduct themselves professionally and respectfully.

If a claim was made that a member raped someone (although the board has no physical proof), the board would probably kick the guy off so he doesn't readily have access to contact more providers. That's how I see it.

[Kal El69]

It simply don't work that way. The owners wont do nothing to anyone on here that does not break the rules "HERE". You can be a member and a total a$$, but as long as you follow board rules, you won't get into trouble. if certain guys would leave things alone here.....if something happens off the board, even if it is with board members. you can deal with it off the board, just better not talk about it here, though. In the case of some hypothetical lady screwing me over, I would have no problem screwing back with her..... staking out her incall, figuring out what her pimp looks like, taking down his license plate, taking his pic, taking pics of hypothetical "Johns" walking in and out the door, and turning the info over to both the hotel and the police. If you put it into writing, they have to take action..... just you wont catch me telling anyone on the board that I did it.let us face it, the board makes it easy for us to hook up, makes it easy for us to get SOME background info and know SOME things about the ladies before we meet them. It also gives the ladies some info about us. Hopefully, when gents have problems, they will at least report on it,so we can make informed decisions. you know the laidys talk about us, for sure.you wont find a lady here who can honestly say I ever shorted them or treated them poorly in real life.... but don't know what I would do if I was ever threatened in real life.... probably would not be good to know.

[SimplyGwen]

Originally Posted by Kal El69

It simply don't work that way. The owners wont do nothing to anyone on here that does not break the rules "HERE". You can be a member and a total a$$, but as long as you follow board rules, you won't get into trouble. if certain guys would leave things alone here.....if something happens off the board, even if it is with board members. you can deal with it off the board, just better not talk about it here, though. In the case of some hypothetical lady screwing me over, I would have no problem screwing back with her..... staking out her incall, figuring out what her pimp looks like, taking down his license plate, taking his pic, taking pics of hypothetical "Johns" walking in and out the door, and turning the info over to both the hotel and the police. If you put it into writing, they have to take action..... just you wont catch me telling anyone on the board that I did it.let us face it, the board makes it easy for us to hook up, makes it easy for us to get SOME background info and know SOME things about the ladies before we meet them. It also gives the ladies some info about us. Hopefully, when gents have problems, they will at least report on it,so we can make informed decisions. you know the laidys talk about us, for sure.you wont find a lady here who can honestly say I ever shorted them or treated them poorly in real life.... but don't know what I would do if I was ever threatened in real life.... probably would not be good to know.

Ahh, nothing like a good ol stake-out!

[Guest062716]

Originally Posted by Gwendolyn Cain

Ahh, nothing like a good ol stake-out!

I am both LOL and SMH at all of this. As much as I don't like to admit it, Superboy has a point.

The board (owners, admins and moderators) deal with board actions and infractions.

The real world and off board issues are left to the real world and best left off the board.... with some exceptions.

I would think (and doubt I will get any disagreement) that real world threats and/or actions of outings/contacts of work and family that involve a member ARE 100% alert worthy and it is generally in the community's best interest for people to come forward.

Two ways you can do that - head on, with your handle tied to the post, or indirectly, by asking a mod or trusted member to post info on your behalf. IMO, the info needs to be out there, so WE ALL can make informed decisions.

As to what you do off the board, about off the board actions.... all I will say is consult a lawyer and be careful. Never lie to the cops. Be careful who you may piss off.

To be sure, I am pretty open with my info and overly trusting. I am overly protective with any info that comes my way. I really don't look over my shoulder, even though I have had stalkers and threats made against me. People showing up unexpectedly in my real world can expect real world results. (and if they are people I met in the hobby, hobby world alerts).

Real world results I have seen used in the past?

Filing of harassment charges with the local LE

Filing of trespass charges with the local LE, the hotel/motel/apartment management

Filing of charges of threats of with local LE

Filing a notice with a motel/hotel management of "suspicious activity" in room xxx, with a note that if it is not addressed, you will not use their business in the future and may have to file a notice with local LE

Filing same complaint with the non-emergency local LE number, of suspicious activity in room xxx of hotel Y.

Phone calls, text messages and/or emails explaining that these are options one is considering.

Blocked phone calls to numbers with not so subtle messages being delivered.

Businesses in any city, do NOT want trouble with their neighbors or the police. They will generally act very quickly to a formal complaint. In the smaller cities, the police are a lot more aggressive about their response and actions. In the larger cities, generally less so.

In Killeen, Waco, BCS, any call to the non-emergency number with a story about how numerous people walking in and out of a hotel room all night long, every 30 minutes or so spells drug dealer or prostitution to the LE. Even with a provider, they are hoping for a drug bust and the possibility of turning her into a confidential informant should they need one.

Anyway, those are my thoughts. Has been interesting reading yours and looking forward to more.... (Except for yours, Superboy, you made your point(s), do you mind sitting the rest of this thread out? Thanks)

Respectfully,

OldSarge

[Ranchhand]

Hyphothetically speaking, I have maybe been threatened in real life, and hyphothetically I know what action I took, if it really happened, and it worked, hyphothetically that is.

[ArisRose]

Tell that bitch to go fuck herself.

[ArisRose]

Originally Posted by Gwendolyn Cain

Ahh, nothing like a good ol stake-out!

Ain't nobody got time for that, lol!