Ladies, how big of a deal is it if a guy is late to an appt?

[WorknMan]

I know it seems like a bizarre question, but I have been wondering about this lately. I was raised with the belief that if you are supposed to be somewhere, you should always be there on time, even if it means you're early. Thus, if I figure it will take about 20 minutes for me to get to the incall, I will leave about 20 minutes earlier than that, just in case the traffic is bad, or whatever. This almost always results in me getting to the incall about 20 minutes early, which isn't a big deal. I just drive around for 20 minutes and come back, then call the lady to see if she's ready (since I usually don't have the apartment/hotel number).

However, it seems that the lady is running late about 90% of the time, so I end up having to drive around for at least another 15-20 minutes, or just sit in the parking lot. (I hope that doesn't sound like a negative stereotype like 'women are always late to appts'. I'm not being bitter about it, but just stating a matter of fact.) Thus, I'm starting to wonder what's the point in ensuring that I'm always on time, when even on those rare occasions where the lady is ready at the appointed time, she is probably in a frantic rush, trying to get everything in order. If I just left my place in such a manner that I'd get there at about the time of the appt, perhaps it would make it a bit less stressful on her if I ended up being a little late, as opposed to her being upset about it?

[shorty]

Originally Posted by WorknMan

I know it seems like a bizarre question, but I have been wondering about this lately. I was raised with the belief that if you are supposed to be somewhere, you should always be there on time, even if it means you're early. Thus, if I figure it will take about 20 minutes for me to get to the incall, I will leave about 20 minutes earlier than that, just in case the traffic is bad, or whatever. This almost always results in me getting to the incall about 20 minutes early, which isn't a big deal. I just drive around for 20 minutes and come back, then call the lady to see if she's ready (since I usually don't have the apartment/hotel number).

However, it seems that the lady is running late about 90% of the time, so I end up having to drive around for at least another 15-20 minutes, or just sit in the parking lot. (I hope that doesn't sound like a negative stereotype like 'women are always late to appts'. I'm not being bitter about it, but just stating a matter of fact.) Thus, I'm starting to wonder what's the point in ensuring that I'm always on time, when even on those rare occasions where the lady is ready at the appointed time, she is probably in a frantic rush, trying to get everything in order. If I just left my place in such a manner that I'd get there at about the time of the appt, perhaps it would make it a bit less stressful on her if I ended up being a little late, as opposed to her being upset about it?

I for one is always on time and no more than 5 minutes late to see a lady. I have never understood someone that says they are a low volume provider and still can't be ready on time. So how low volume is she, when she's running 15-20 minutes late? Now I can see it if your wanting to see her around 8-9am and she's not a morning person. Personally if a lady is running late, I usually cancel. I have no patience for a lady that knows several days in advance the date and time of the date.

[Guest041413-2]

Never be late.
If you are going to be late let her know a.s.a.p.
Pick your women much better than you have been.
Never accept NC/NS
If she is late, habitually or not, & in behaviour shows little regard for your time or the effect on you, WALK AWAY! Fast and never look back!

[Sonja]

True, you guys are always excited and on time (read, 5-10-20 min early) and me, always running a tiny bit late in a frantic rush. This may be a girl on guy thing that is old as days. Women stuff! I don't recommend being late. Just show up on time. I have guys always call and say, 'Hey, I'm here" 20 min ahead, but I'll wait outside." Pisses me off. We know you are excited, but our hair is not dry, the dog is not fed, the candles are not lit, the last touches are not on. Just be on time. For me, 5 min over is just enough, but I get used to -on time people. I will get used to you, if you show up exactly. Early, which to me seems to be the norm, gets on my nerves to no end. 'On time' is my fault if I'm not and will make it up to you with extras!

[Tori Hastings]

I'm always on time, so I feel my fella should be too. Otherwise, I will worry and think he's gonna NCNS on me. Also, if you're late, it could put me behind on another appointment or whatever else may be going on. If it's going to put me behind, you've shaved time off your appointment. So, be on time. You may be on a time limit too. If she's late, gauge whether or not you can still do the appointment. If you can't, let her know. It goes both ways. It's called having respect for one another.

[WorknMan]

Originally Posted by Sonja

True, you guys are always excited and on time (read, 5-10-20 min early) and me, always running a tiny bit late in a frantic rush. This may be a girl on guy thing that is old as days. Women stuff! I don't recommend being late. Just show up on time. I have guys always call and say, 'Hey, I'm here" 20 min ahead, but I'll wait outside." Pisses me off. We know you are excited, but our hair is not dry, the dog is not fed, the candles are not lit, the last touches are not on.

So if the guys are usually early/on time, why not make an extra effort to be ready 15-20 mins before the session, or at least waiting at the door if the guy shows up exactly on time? I don't know about other guys, but a lady who gains a reputation for always being on time for appts (and even advertises as such), would be placed higher on my 'to do' list than other ladies, all other things being equal.

It seems to me that there are very simple things ladies could do (esp in the TCB dept) to increase their business that they just don't do, and this happens to be one of them. But, as you say, this may be 'a girl on guy thing that is old as days'. Meaning, being on time may be something that some women just aren't capable of. Again, I may get blasted for stereotyping, but you know there are women who are always late for *everything*. But being on time is almost always a choice, and if it isn't, you're probably scheduling appts too close together.

[alluringava]

Originally Posted by WorknMan

I know it seems like a bizarre question, but I have been wondering about this lately. I was raised with the belief that if you are supposed to be somewhere, you should always be there on time, even if it means you're early. Thus, if I figure it will take about 20 minutes for me to get to the incall, I will leave about 20 minutes earlier than that, just in case the traffic is bad, or whatever. This almost always results in me getting to the incall about 20 minutes early, which isn't a big deal. I just drive around for 20 minutes and come back, then call the lady to see if she's ready (since I usually don't have the apartment/hotel number).

However, it seems that the lady is running late about 90% of the time, so I end up having to drive around for at least another 15-20 minutes, or just sit in the parking lot. (I hope that doesn't sound like a negative stereotype like 'women are always late to appts'. I'm not being bitter about it, but just stating a matter of fact.) Thus, I'm starting to wonder what's the point in ensuring that I'm always on time, when even on those rare occasions where the lady is ready at the appointed time, she is probably in a frantic rush, trying to get everything in order. If I just left my place in such a manner that I'd get there at about the time of the appt, perhaps it would make it a bit less stressful on her if I ended up being a little late, as opposed to her being upset about it?

I would prefer it if even if the guy is going to be ten minutes late that he have the courtesy to call and let me know. I never book many appointments back to back, ever, but it's a matter of courtesy just to make a call. One time, a guy drove in a snowstorm to get to my house and he called to say he was going to be an hour late. At least he called and that was no problem, I understand things happen. There's traffic, etc, but calling a provider is always a good thing to do. Especially if she has a track record herself of being timely and always ready and not making YOU wait. Likewise, if she's going to be late, she should have the decency and manners to call you.

[simpleton]

This is not a girl guy issue as long as days. It is a respect issue. Those people who are always late have a complete lack of respect for the person that is waiting on him or her. This bug the shit out of me.

[WorknMan]

Originally Posted by alluringava

I would prefer it if even if the guy is going to be ten minutes late that he have the courtesy to call and let me know.

Of course. I would never, ever dream of being late and not calling

[alluringava]

Originally Posted by WorknMan

Of course. I would never, ever dream of being late and not calling

You better be sure to call...because I'm an MMA fighter and I will wrestle you to the ground if you're late. :P

[guest010313]

I was raised by a woman that is 30 minutes late to everything. I fucking hate that. If I'm going to be even a minute late I call. You get to be late on my time once. Consistant tardiness comes out of your time. There is zero excuse for it. It is my experience that people who are chronically late have no concept that this is irritating and rude to others and it makes me nuts. If I can be anywhere on the dot so can you.

[pyramider]

Originally Posted by simpleton

This is not a girl guy issue as long as days. It is a respect issue. Those people who are always late have a complete lack of respect for the person that is waiting on him or her. This bug the shit out of me.

At least there is a payoff in the hobby. How about waiting at the doctor's office? Now that just pisses me off. More than once I have just got up and left telling the receptionist when the office decides to respect my time call me . . .

[charlestudor2005]

Originally Posted by shorty

I for one is always on time and no more than 5 minutes late to see a lady. I have never understood someone that says they are a low volume provider and still can't be ready on time. So how low volume is she, when she's running 15-20 minutes late? Now I can see it if your wanting to see her around 8-9am and she's not a morning person. Personally if a lady is running late, I usually cancel. I have no patience for a lady that knows several days in advance the date and time of the date.

Originally Posted by SillyGirl

I was raised by a woman that is 30 minutes late to everything. I fucking hate that. If I'm going to be even a minute late I call. You get to be late on my time once. Consistant tardiness comes out of your time. There is zero excuse for it. It is my experience that people who are chronically late have no concept that this is irritating and rude to others and it makes me nuts. If I can be anywhere on the dot so can you.

I think you two are way too harsh. Shit happens. When the stars align, everyone is on time. However, the number of variables working into the alignment thing are too numerous to mention. Did the weather cooperate (recently, it caused a lady in Dallas to be late to our appointment by 30 minutes)? Are family issues cooperating? Are work issues cooperating?

I'm the kind of guy for which punctuality is a major issue. And when someone runs late, it pisses me off. Having said that, I recognize that this is one of my faults, and I try to allow for that...and have some level of forgiveness in me.

[Old-T]

Originally Posted by shorty

I have never understood someone that says they are a low volume provider and still can't be ready on time. So how low volume is she, when she's running 15-20 minutes late?

Most my experience with ladies being late have not been "volume" but one of two things:
--Small kids being small kids. Every two year ould in the universe will pick the most inopportune time to do something, even if they are told two days in advance. And teenage babysitters are not much better.
--The day job takes precidence. You or I are a small paycheck in comparison to her primary job. Listening to posts I suspect I see a larger fraction of ladies who do this as a second job, so maybe I run into this situation more than many.

Originally Posted by pyramider

How about waiting at the doctor's office? Now that just pisses me off. More than once I have just got up and left telling the receptionist when the office decides to respect my time call me . . .

I was raised in a medical family (didn't follow in those footsteps because I have issues with the sight of blood) and worked many summers in Drs' offices. Almost without exception the patients that griped about having to wait were the same ones who made a 15 min appointment for one small issue, and when they got in with the Dr rolled out a long list of ailments and got really pissed if the Dr wouldn't listen to/address all their issues. I've also see a person waiting for a routine appointment go totally ballistc because the Dr wouldn't see her on time just because a woman went into premature labor in the office.

================

I will completely agree with allowing enough time to be 15 min early, grab a cup of coffee, and show up at precisely the agreed upon time. And when that doesn't work--CALL. It isn't a one-sex thing, as Simpleton said, it's basic respect. Life happens; communicate!

[Naomi4u]

Originally Posted by Old-T

Most my experience with ladies being late have not been "volume" but one of two things:
--Small kids being small kids. Every two year ould in the universe will pick the most inopportune time to do something, even if they are told two days in advance. And teenage babysitters are not much better.
--The day job takes precidence. You or I are a small paycheck in comparison to her primary job. Listening to posts I suspect I see a larger fraction of ladies who do this as a second job, so maybe I run into this situation more than many.



I was raised in a medical family (didn't follow in those footsteps because I have issues with the sight of blood) and worked many summers in Drs' offices. Almost without exception the patients that griped about having to wait were the same ones who made a 15 min appointment for one small issue, and when they got in with the Dr rolled out a long list of ailments and got really pissed if the Dr wouldn't listen to/address all their issues. I've also see a person waiting for a routine appointment go totally ballistc because the Dr wouldn't see her on time just because a woman went into premature labor in the office.

================

I will completely agree with allowing enough time to be 15 min early, grab a cup of coffee, and show up at precisely the agreed upon time. And when that doesn't work--CALL. It isn't a one-sex thing, as Simpleton said, it's basic respect. Life happens; communicate!

Thank you so much for this post. I am sure the ladies love you.