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Coed Discussions - Mississippi Hobby-related discussions belong here. Let's keep these discussions on-topic, thought-provoking, and more importantly...entertaining!

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Old 10-23-2016, 07:15 PM   #1
Road Lizard
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Default Let's talk about Meet&Greet parties

I was contacted by a provider about putting together a Meet & Greet in the Jackson area a couple of months ago and I tried to make it happen. Plenty of ladies said they would come but I couldn't get enough guys to commit to make it worth anyone's time and it didn't happen. So here's what I want to do: Let's just talk about out concerns and conditions that need to be addressed so we can make this happen. We're not going to plan a M&G on the board, just discuss what it would take to make it happen.

Where I am, I can organize in either Jackson or the Coast...sorry yall in northern MS. If someone wants to do it there, I'll help you with the leg work. I've got places picked in both areas that would good for meeting. The quick version is I contact those that are interested/committed, set up a place that we can eat, drink and have fun putting faces to names. I'm a divorced guy so I don't have to worry about a wife but I know that's not the case for a lot people, so I need to know what conditions need to happen & where it needs to happen so I can put it together. If there is NO way you can make it, no problem but I don't need to hear from you.

So guys...what are your concerns other than getting caught by the wife? Help me make this happen. When it comes to an actual M&G, I'll use the PM system to contact everyone and we'll keep it completely off the board. I'll only contact people that can be verified thru other guys and ladies. In fact, to the guys that can come, send me a PM with the header "M&G" and the area you can attend...that will help me GREATLY. Either put in there Jackson or the Coast. Now guys, what are YOUR issues?

Ladies, what are the issues concerning you? I want to address your concerns and security issues also. We need to see the problems that concerns both parties and try to come up with solutions that help us all have a great time together. This is a great way to get to know each other and play safer so let's talk.
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Old 10-23-2016, 08:05 PM   #2
Ninotsugi
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#30 - ECCIE does not, in any way, sponsor or represent social events, meet and greets, or similar activities. On occasion, events may be announced here by our members, however, ECCIE is not associated with or responsible for such events. We are not involved with any related aspects, such as guest selection, screening, or hosting. Should members of our volunteer staff choose to participate in such an event, it should be understood that their personal involvement is of their own choice and responsibility, and in no way connected to their duties here on staff. If you are the host of one of these events, we will allow for ONE "announcement" post to inform the membership, which will be immediately locked to prevent further public discussions regarding the event.
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Old 10-23-2016, 08:15 PM   #3
Road Lizard
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Are you a Mod?

No? Then add to the conversation or let me get 'caught' by a real moderator.
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Old 10-23-2016, 10:22 PM   #4
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Lizard - I'm in that group that can't afford to be caught out in public. Wish I could figure out a better way to make it work though. Hell, I'd be open to sitting across the bar/restaurant trying to eavesdrop on the M&G however!
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Old 10-24-2016, 04:41 AM   #5
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I'd be interested in this. I'm not divorced, but I do travel to Jackson pretty often.
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Old 10-24-2016, 06:31 AM   #6
JustaGuyinMS
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RL:

I think your post is fine - no violation of ECCIE Guideline #30 as long as you keep it as a discussion about M&Gs and not the organization of one.

You are correct about a lot of guys being concerned about being caught by their SO, so I found with past M&Gs that having it on a weekday, late afternoon or early evening allows guys the most flexibility. Weekends tend to be difficult, as do events that go late in the evening.

There is another concern - having non-hobbyists, including staff at the location, figure out what's going on. To avoid that, there has to be emphasis on dress (casual and not sexy), activities (no sexy kissing, groping, or overt discussions about the hobby, including making BCD arrangements). The key is to make it look like a group of people who have similar interests getting together to have a few drinks and food.

Good luck on setting up a M&G within the Guideline #30.

JaG
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Old 10-24-2016, 10:19 AM   #7
Road Lizard
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Thanks JaG, appreciate the input about Rule 30 and especially about how the conduct should be when getting together.

Going for a weekday is something I'll use and I'm thinking something like 4-6pm for a window of time.

One thing a provider told me that came to MS from Texas was to keep it as UTR as possible and verify, verify, and verify who to invite because of something that happened at one she was at.
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Old 10-24-2016, 10:24 AM   #8
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Old 10-24-2016, 10:31 AM   #9
Road Lizard
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Your link doesn't work. Just say what's on your mind.
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Old 10-24-2016, 01:09 PM   #10
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RL, your OP is right on topic and like Justaguy stated it doesn't break any rules. In fact, it's actually thoughtful of you to get insight from both sides regarding eventually setting up a M&G. I really do hope to attend a future M&G before I retire. :-)
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Old 10-24-2016, 01:22 PM   #11
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RL I THINK YOU GO AHEAD WITH IT,AND YOU WILL GET A GOOD RESPONSE. I love meeting new friends
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Old 10-24-2016, 02:06 PM   #12
Road Lizard
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Thank you ladies, I really appreciate that.

Ann, I got very little response from the guys when I tried to set up Jackson. The ladies were great with the response, even had 2 that were coming up from New Orleans to attend.

For security reasons, I won't list who was coming and I won't ever say that on the board. Thought I better explain that.

I think ideally, we need at least a 2-to-1 ratio of guys to ladies so that gives more cover to the married ones. That way, someone sees a married guy out, no one can truly say he was there with a woman. Also, it helps when the bill for the food comes since the guys pay the food and drink bill, ladies pay nothing. We divide the bill equally among the guys and pay it. Pretty simple.
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Old 10-24-2016, 03:44 PM   #13
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Lea had held M&G and so have I in the past and none of them were EVER infiltrated.
Guys and Gals, have a friggin blast and screw the pessimism. Just screen wisely
And honestly, a lady needs to be the one throwing this thing, not a dude. Just my .02
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Old 10-24-2016, 03:58 PM   #14
Road Lizard
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Ok that's the first time I've ever heard someone say a lady should host it. Mind expanding on why?

Edit to add: I'm not trying to take anyone's place, just trying to make something happen since no one else will. For me, ideally it should be a lady and a guy setting it up so we cover more bases. Seriously, I'd love to hear more from you Muse.
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Old 10-24-2016, 06:38 PM   #15
biomed1
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Agree that the task should be split between the Hobbyists and the Providers.
I helped set up many M&G's in Indianapolis before I move to the Coast.
There we had a committee of Hobbyists and Providers.
All potential attendees requested an invitation via e-mail or PM.
The committee vetted each person requesting an invitation.
Any one member of the committee that voted no on someone wishing to attend and they were rejected.
Anyone not approved by the committee can not and must not be allowed to attend.
You are asking for trouble if old "so & so" shows up with "what's his face" and says - "he's a good guy, I'll vouch for him".

Face it the Providers have the experience of screening.
They also have a good chance of knowing another Provider who wishes to attend.
One of the Hobbyists most often will have met with at least one of the Providers wishing to attend.

As JAG stated the actions of all who attend is also crucial to the security of the event.

The M&G is a SOCIAL event.
It is a chance to meet other members of the board.
You can find out if the person matches their board persona.
Hobbyists can determine IF you wish to pursue an appointment with the Provider.
Providers can determine IF they wish to accept an appointment with the Hobbyist.
However, this must be discussed at some other time and place than at the M & G.
"Business" discussions and "slipping away for some fun" are what caused the trouble at the Houston party.

There is nothing illegal about a bunch of folks who are members of a discussion board getting together and meeting face to face once in a while and sharing a drink or some food.

Please take my comments as opinion or experience, and it is worth every penny you have paid for it.

Biomed1
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