Married/Single Hobbyists

[RichardNixon]

Hi guys and gals. I hope everyone in our fun hobby on both sides of the aisle is having a happy fourth.

I recently had a provider tell me that "95 percent" of her clientele is married. Now, the fact that a significant number of hobbyists--and even most hobbyists--are married is not shocking. I was a little surprised at the number, and I trust this provider's math.

I am single. I have been divorced over 20 years now and never re-married. It's hard to believe I am one-in-twenty.

I do "date," y'know ... that may lead to an authentic relationship. I think I'm relatively well-adjusted.

If I ever did get married again, I would hope that I would find my intimate satisfaction within the bounds of my marriage. Obviously, a lot of guys don't, and hey, I'm not condemning.

As a single hobbyist, yes, I DO get some love triangle just in the normal course of relationships that are not "professional." I'm not an ogre.

Why do I hobby? As a middle-aged man, I still love being with good-looking women. I'm not interested in going through all the bullshit at a bar or club, when I know what I want. I think most of these "bar flies" are hypocrites. They claim they want to be "friends" when they are playing court jester in a bar, but hell, they are looking for the same thing I'm looking for. I'm just more direct in how I want to get it.

I suppose most of my appetite is satisfied with a limited "sugar baby" relationship. She is not a provider and I do not totally support her, but you know ... kind of "grocery money" and we are "friends with benefits." I do not have the means to be a total "sugar daddy." And yes, I admire you guys with unlimited funds that can hobby several times a week. I would if I could. When I go to the pool, I get driven crazy looking. No, I can't look at a Playboy Magazine and immediately stand at attention like I did when I was 18, but I stay about as horny as when I was 18.

So, as a single guy, I'm not Brad Pitt, but I'm not Frankenstein's Monster either. It's not that I can't get it any other way, but hobbying is the most direct way to satisfy my needs. AND as a single guy, it's nice to not have to hide from a wife or a girlfriend. I can do what I want, whenever the hell I want--funds available, of course.

Are single hobbyists few and far between?

Any other thoughts on any of this?

[eholiday]

I'm a single guy also. I hobby for pretty much the same reasons as you do. If I was in an intimate relationship with someone, I doubt I would be able to continue in the hobby if I was being taken care of at home. If I wasn't being taken care of, in some way in my relationship, and hobby for the rest, then its not one I should be in.

Just my $.02.

[Guest052115-1]

Originally Posted by eholiday

If I wasn't being taken care of, in some way in my relationship, and hobby for the rest, then its not one I should be in.

Its not always that for us married guys. You have to take into account the variety the hobby affords us. Doing to the same ole things over and over again can get boring. So, the hobby quinces that thirst.

[MrGiz]

I am in a very attached, open relationship which allows pure sexual play. * I get more than I can handle at home... literally... but I still lchase strange within the hobby... guess I'm just a DAWG!! *

My Hobby play is pure selfish gratification with a willing and able variety of great playmates.... Life Is Good!!

[gimme_that]

I hobby when I'm not in a relationship. Although it wasn't that way all the time......If I was married hoobbying would not be an option for me.

[eholiday]

Don't take what I said the wrong way. I'm not putting down married or attached guys that do. I just meant it wouldn't be an option for me, unless maybe I was in an open relationship like Giz over there. Lucky fucker...

[Outdoorsman]

I am single but started hobbying before my divorce was finalized. We were separated. I wanted to have sex with beautiful women but I did not want the relationship, so I hobbied.

I have dated and gotten involved with civilian ladies and I stopped seeing providers for short periods. As soon as the relationship fizzled out, emotionally and physically, I stopped dating the woman and went right back to seeing providers. Seems I will do this pattern for a while.

If I am infatuated or liking a lady I turn into a monogamous person. The sex is always great at first, seems she is trying to impress me. Then 2 months later it is boring, Mish only, oral stops, etc. etc. I still do not see providers until I have "the talk" with my lady friend. Some of those talks have really created chaos in my life at times, lol.

I never leave the hobby as I read this site daily, but I do stop seeing providers when I am in a relationship.

I never understood why these women stop the fun sexy parts so quickly. After a few months she stops putting on teddies, sexy clothing, no more sex during the day, always at night, always same old thing.

I adore being a family man and would welcome a new wife, but I have to love her to no ends of the Earth and I have to feel she loves me in the same way. On that day I will leave the hobby, but she is an elusive creature to find. Until then I will enjoy this site, the women, and the sex, just me.

[shazzan]

I just enjoy having sex with younger hotter women than I am reasonably able to pick up with my charms. The simplicity of hobbying is nice, and as long as it is a few times a month the cost is reasonable when you consider how much drinks and dinner cost when you take women out. Now if I were in a relationship with a relatively fit non-frigid woman, I don't think I would be hobbying much if at all. But, it is still fun to bang a 22 year old former gymnast every once in a while.

[guest080813]

all about variety for me

[PAPA JOE]

it's just fun !!!

[weebbadd]

As a married guy I started the hobby about 12 years ago when my relationship with the wife went south. I have enjoyed the ladies but prefer to have a special relationship with a single provider most of the time thru the years. I am on the verge of a divorce and have backed off some from the hobby trying to get my money in order.
I enjoy variety from time to time but if I met the right lady my hobby days would be over. The problem is I haven't met the right lady, yet, as I have high expectations after meeting so many classy ladies here. I could easily fall for many of the ladies I have met here, but I am realistic that it would be a long shot for one of these lovely ladies to be serious about an old fart like me, and I am not rich so that kinda kills any chances I may have. Plus I have an old school attitude not to mix this pleasure business with my love life.
I hope my next relationship works out much better than my current one, I kinda figure that I when I meet the right girl I won't want to hobby because she will want to do all the things I want to when I want to.
At least a guy can dream, if it doesn't work out I will be in this hobby for a long time to come which for me is not a bad thing right now.
Sorry but romance is

[weebbadd]

Damn iPhone typing sucks.
I was trying to say romance is not dead just hard as hell to find.

[ashwednesday666]

Been there, good luck.

[gimme_that]

Originally Posted by weebbadd

The problem is I haven't met the right lady, yet, as I have high expectations after meeting so many classy ladies here.

When you say high expectations, I'm presuming you mean sexual right? Not so much looks, personality, etc......

It can be hard to find woman who provide all of what these ladies provide for us physically. But what we tend to forget is in the hobby that's mainly motivated by money. I'm sure it could be in civilian dating as well, but an emotional attachment has to be there for her to have the motivation to accommodate you.

This may be limited to the types of ladies who attract your interest, and the ones you feel comfortable approaching. If you date woman who aren't normally sexually inhibited as the degree providers are here. The ladies you see or fantacize about in the hobby and see may be starkly different for your civilian counterparts personality wise. But this is the part most hobbyist never see no matter how good the provider client relationship.

If your reasons are more physical, I think I agree with you as these ladies performances do set the bar hih for ladies in my civilian life. Sex is exciting initially when I'm dating and ladies go all out to please you. But at some point it tapers off at some point after she has locked you in. I'm a big believer in "the stuff you do to get me, is what you will need to do to keep me.".....but that goes both ways through. I'm under 35 and tend to date woman between 23 and 28 civilian (seem to be more youthful and agile to me) because of the physical limitations and busy careers and lifestyles of ladies closer to my age. They have a little more time to relax from time to time in bunches.

But what I want in the hobby is vastly different from the types of ladies I date civilian. I tend to see thicker more curvvy woman (20 pounds or so from BBW or so) in my civilian life versus mostly petite woman with curves in the hobby. Mainly because my ideal body type pics of ladies I choosewere not all good ones sex wise.

[skeeter]

I guess I'm a little different ..... I am older and very married and love my wife VERY much and if she new I hobbied it would break her heart.... But because of an auto accident that broke her back ( which was repaired ) it left her with some limitations .... and the hobby meets my needs with no strings ....but .... I agree it would be sooooo easy to become attached to some of the ladies in this venue....