I have a name...and it's Samantha.

[samantha thom]

I don't know why I get turned off and annoyed when a potential client writes me and calls me 'baby' or 'sexy' or anything else cheesy similar to that. It just doesn't do it for me. I would give it a red flag in my mental screening. I tell the gent..."I would appreciate it if you can address me by my name."
If we already develop a rapport and not strangers anymore, I would be different. But a complete stranger? I'd rather receive a nice polite introduction e-mail.
My intuition is usually correct. Guys who write like this most of the time end up sending endless e-mail back and forth wasting my time without firming up a plan to meet. I have no choice than being my usual blunt self in a professional manner. It may sound cold and ruin his fantasy but he has ruined my desire to meet him. I'm trying to be as efficient with my life and business, ya know? I have no time for endless e-mail that is going nowhere.

[TexasCowboy]

Samantha......You are a beautiful woman with a personality to match.....

TexasCowboy

[omakase]

I feel the same way when ladies write back "hon," "sweetie," or "babe." Are they talking to me or the appointment after me?

I agree, professional courtesy and attention to details go a long way.

[txcwby6]

Perhaps the use of "sexy" or "baby" or whatever other name a Hobbyist chooses to call you reflects the perception that many (most?) Providers do not use their real names. The offending Hobbyists might have presume that your "real" name wasn't Samantha.

Therefore, I must confess that my "real" first name is NOT Txcwby6. Phew! Glad I got that off my chest.

[bule84]

I hate the use of Hon, babe, sweety, or dear from people I dont know. Even if I know them i really dont like to be called any of those. It sonds condesending to me...Im sure it is not meant that way, but i seems like it to me

[addict]

Some of the best first sessions I've ever had have been with women who were openly flirty in their communications leading up to the meeting. My the time we actually were face to face, the awkwardness was nowhere to be seen and we didn't have that weird transition from formality to sex that can accompany initial meetings.

I often try and break that wall initially with a "hello beautiful", or "how are you, gorgeous". If I get a cold, business like response back I often times will stop my pursuit, for fear that it's a glimpse into what the session will be like.

[hd]

I think majority of guys, when they are communicating thru text, are "in the mood" and assume the slang (sexy talk) will do the same for you? He's hoping to make you think you're one lucky gal for him to want to see you. I think I know better!

My name isn't HD, but you all can call me what my close friends and family do.......Sir

[eccienewbie]

I have a name, too.

But it's not the one I use for hobby purposes, so baby or sweetie or hon is fine by me. A pronoun's as good as a fake name for my purposes.

[Caleb]

Originally Posted by addict

Some of the best first sessions I've ever had have been with women who were openly flirty in their communications leading up to the meeting. My the time we actually were face to face, the awkwardness was nowhere to be seen and we didn't have that weird transition from formality to sex that can accompany initial meetings.

I often try and break that wall initially with a "hello beautiful", or "how are you, gorgeous". If I get a cold, business like response back I often times will stop my pursuit, for fear that it's a glimpse into what the session will be like.

I couldn't agree more. The best first sessions I have experienced have all had a generous measure of flirting and teasing in the initial communication. It builds excitement for our encounter, and this carries all the way through our time together. Those sessions that have started with flat, businesslike communication have turned out to be flat, not so exciting transactions.

There is a way to be flirty and have a safe, thorough TCB process. So with that, I say bring on the honey, baby, sweetie, sugarpie and let's play a little. Life is too short not to have fun!

[jfred]

Originally Posted by samantha thom

...a complete stranger?

My intuition is usually correct....

I can't argue with your screening methods if they're effective, SugarLips And, ya know, I'm with you in principle: gratuitous use of pet names and sweeticisms usually comes across as inappropriate and condescending, at least to thinking people, male or female.

But I'm grasping for your perspective. Hmm it's true that respect and good manners can be a part of any interaction, social or commercial...and that's obviously the way you prefer things. But the business you've chosen...

The same guy you object to sweetthinging you will still be essentially a stranger when he's, say, lapping your genitals a few hours later.

Prior excitement, and the sense of being sexy, is part of the bag for a lot of guys and you may be fucking up your customer's sense of pacing. Anyway, of you have a preference that's cool. I just don't get the "I hardly know you" angle.

[phildo]

Gents, in an age when wimmin have more than half the money and ALL of the pussy, it behooves us to overcome our southernboy flare for "How dee do, gorgeous" et al and speak to these ladies as they wish to be spoken to. That whole thing was already headed for the storage closet along with astronaut wife hair styles, avocado green appliances, shag carpet and cadillac bumper bras by 1970. And I feel the same way...."huny you want to cum see me?", "OK bby" is just cheap throw away chatter is a world with enough of it already. I'd rather a woman called me anything, even my handle, than the texted down versions of huny an bby an sgr and all the rest. Call me old fashioned, but treat a lady like a lady from moment one, see where she's coming from, THEN put on the Sixties manly charm if it's viable, or reach deeper in your expanded bag of dealing with the opposite sex tricks and be as diverse and modern as is required.

You know a woman, is sentimental
And so easy to upset (yea-eah-eah!)
So make her feel, that she's for real
And she'll give you happiness

Couldn't resist

[the_chewtoy]

Originally Posted by samantha thom

I don't know why I get turned off and annoyed when a potential client writes me and calls me 'baby' or 'sexy' or anything else cheesy similar to that. It just doesn't do it for me. I would give it a red flag in my mental screening. I tell the gent..."I would appreciate it if you can address me by my name."
If we already develop a rapport and not strangers anymore, I would be different. But a complete stranger? I'd rather receive a nice polite introduction e-mail.
My intuition is usually correct. Guys who write like this most of the time end up sending endless e-mail back and forth wasting my time without firming up a plan to meet. I have no choice than being my usual blunt self in a professional manner. It may sound cold and ruin his fantasy but he has ruined my desire to meet him. I'm trying to be as efficient with my life and business, ya know? I have no time for endless e-mail that is going nowhere.

Samantha, does this mean you're going to be upset with me when, "Hey, Beautiful." slips out, as it invariably will? I mean...you ARE beautiful.

I have to warn you..."yes, ma'am" and "no, ma'am" are almost certain to slip out as well!

What can I say? I guess I'm the sort that causes problems!

[coolaid]

I'd stay the hell away from any provider who told me some shit like "I have a name, don't call me baby or honey". Jeez, talk about a mood killer. That's a red flag right there that she's got a bad attitude and is not going to give me the kind of service I'm looking for. Hello! If you suck and fuck for money and claim to be "gfe" ,the romantic and affectionate flirting is a part of the experience.

[hd]

How 'bout "you can call me anything you want, just don't call me late for dinner" , is that sexist or what?

[Ol'blue eyes]

Hmm, I feel the same way.... Generally the ladies reply to info request with babe, baby or honey!!!