F'en Pigs!

[Kelly TNT]

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
(Hardly seems worth it.)

If you farted consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
(Now that's more like it!)

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.
(OMG!)


A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes.
(In my next life, I want to be a pig.)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death.
(Creepy.)

(I'm still not over the pig.)

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories a hour
(Don't try this at home, maybe at work)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body.. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.
("Honey, I'm home. What the....?!")

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field.
(30 minutes.. lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.
(What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.
(I still want to be a pig in my next life...quality over quantity)

Butterflies taste with their feet.
(Something I always wanted to know.)

The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.
(Hmmmmmm......)

Right-handed people live, almost 9yrs longer than Left-handed people.
(If you're ambidextrous, do you split the difference?)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump.
(okay, so that would be a good thing)

A cat's urine glows under a black light.
(I wonder who was paid to figure that out?)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.
(I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains
(I know some people like that too.)

Polar bears are left-handed.
(If they switch, they'll live a lot longer)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure..
(What about that pig??)

30 minutes! Are you Freakin Kidding Me!

Screw That!

~Kelly TNT

[Guest030911]

I don't care who ya are! That's funny!

[Keyzer Soze]

I wonder if I eat more bacon, would help extend the length of my orgasims????

[1thatgotaway]

I love bacon, but so far i think the only thing it has extended is the diameter or my ass

[Maxx]

I always wondered why pigs squeeled (sp) so loud and for so long! Yum Bacon!

[Keyzer Soze]

I hear you brother, but can't blame a guy for trying........

[Keyzer Soze]

Originally Posted by 1thatgotaway

I love bacon, but so far i think the only thing it has extended is the diameter or my ass

I hear you brother but you can't blame a guy for trying.........

[Kelly TNT]

1TGA!

LOL...You're tag line option...

Ummm....I'd like to order 2 of those please. Bacon on the side.

(I'm trying to watch my girlish figure)

~Kelly TNT

[PoppyToyota]

Kelly would you like to add some Lion to that pig for $.99 extra? Is that for here or togo? Ok so we have the pig with a side of lion. Please pull forward to receive your order. MUAH!

[1thatgotaway]

Kelly,

I think i can free up an hour for you

~1TGA

[Kelly TNT]

Okay, I just Has to post this!

LOL!!!
http://www.stumbleupon.com/toolbar/#...252Fbacon_life

1TGA...Thank you for the hour.

~Kelly TNT