Bad reviews and Drama

[Hobbyfun]

I have noticed almost ever time they is a bad review drama follows it, and if you read between the lines most of the time the two people just did not click.

Now before you start throwing stones I'm sure they are some truly bad providers out there but I think most bad reviews are because the provider and the client just had no chemistry are did not click.

If you read between the lines of most of the reviews here you can tell that they are some good reviews of say provider A and then a not so good are bad review pops up one are two, I personal don't just look at the bad review I look at the provider's history then I go look at the reviewers past post and see if he post good reviews are is he just nasty about all are most providers and that tells me the creditability of his post.

That being said if the provider starts getting a lot of bad reviews and the reviewers post mainly good reviews then the provider is the one with the problem.

But lets say I walk in to a providers place and after 5 are 10 minutes they was no chemistry and I wanted to leave I would have to leave my donation and get nothing but if I asked for it back I would play hell getting it then the provider would write something on here are 411 and I would be the ass so like most men after they pay they will play even if they know they are going to have a bad time then they come on here and post a bad review then the drama starts and both side are at it.

Now if you think about it if you go to a provider place be it good are bad you can find fault and the same applies to the lady's if a man shows up and every thing clicks you can find fault so if your mad are not comfortable the faults can fly out at you.

I'm sure provider's have had clients come in and within 5 are 10 min. they know the chemistry is not they and just wants the session to be over with and with out knowing it you might just half-ass the session that is just being human.

Getting ready for a session takes time from the provider and the client plus the client has the gas and extra time traveling to and from the in call so we are both out something to begin with and most of the time you can tell in the first 5 are 10 minutes if it is going to be good bad are in the middle and most activities don't start much before that.

So after everything said how about within the first 5 are 10 minutes either party can say stop the man pays the provider 25% of the session price and everybody just goes then in your review you write did not click and that will be the end of it and if a provider gets a lot of did not click then you know something is wrong with her and the same for the man if you lady's write in the powder room are 411 about a man not clicking after he does that a few time's the rest of the lady's will not see him.

They is no difference between a man getting ready and driving to a provider's place then leaving and a provider getting ready for a client and him leaving are asked to leave they both have time invested and they both lose a little.

I think if this would happen most of the Drama here would stop both parties would have a lose and then the one who makes a big deal about it is the one who likes drama.

There is some truly bad sessions are bad providers and clients but I personally think 80% is just no chemistry and the two people go ahead and try to have a session because she needs are wants the money and the man does not want to lose the money, isn't it funny what we will do for money.

I'm sure I have missed something here and sure somebody is going to point it out so let the stones start fly.

[Guest0812112]

Hobbyfun, While I don't disagree with anything you have said, I think your post points out what is the root of the problem. On two different occasions you commented about the stones starting to fly, this leads me to believe you feel there will be some amount of negitive comments or flaming over your opinions. There are many on this board who have commented about the negitive slant that many want to apply to most subjects. Whatever happened to if you don't have anything good to say just keep your mouth shut?
I have had a bad review, which I did comment about (drama ) There was no appointment, no session, no comunication of any type so how could there be any type review, but there was. I also have had some not so good remarks made in reviews that I've been made aware of and there has been no drama, just a 100% effort to make changes or adjustments to remedy the problem.
I feel that there should be open communication in our post both good and bad, but just searching for the bad helps no one. In agreement with you I wish for less drama, probability a waste of time, but who knows. Possibly with a little thought and some mature reflection on the point attempting to be made, before our fingers go flying over the keyboard might get us a little closer to positive communications both in reviews as well as all posts.

[Hobbyfun]

Well said and I think the finger pointing is from both sides, personally I think if you read both side's you can find the problem in the middle but it's every week they is fur flying and not the good type of fur.
If each person would calmly write what went on and both side's would stay civil about it the drama would slow down.

I'm just saying don't write when your mad tell your side and let the other party write they side and be clam, most of us can figure out what happened without the burning of each other.

The other thing was one way of saying they has to be a middle ground when two party's don't click are they is no chemistry there.

[BigEddie]

If I decide to not go through with the session after meeting the provider, then I would compensate the provider. But if she sees me and says, sorry but I can't go through with this, then I don't owe her anything. Why would I pay her 25% if she refused to go through with the appointment?

To Ms. Simms point, I can understand review rebutals if it's fake, but the ones where providers rip a guy for anything slightly negative are uncalled for and only hurt the provider. Your approach is best and reduces drama significantly.

[Sawyer]

Originally Posted by chelsea simms

. I also have had some not so good remarks made in reviews that I've been made aware of and there has been no drama, just a 100% effort to make changes or adjustments to remedy the problem.

Chelsea I hope that the comments you were made aware of were not in ROS because for WK's to reveal that is a major no-no. Of course we all know that is going on in here. Just saying.....

[Guest082216-1]

Funny how we never hear of leaks from the powder room. Hmm...... I guess the ladies are better at keeping secrects :-)

[dearhunter]

or.............the bros are.

[wolfeman]

You are right, dearhunter. The guys just don't tell everything they hear. lol

[LazurusLong]

Originally Posted by wolfeman

You are right, dearhunter. The guys just don't tell everything they hear. lol

+1

[lisa.lisa0302]

Bad reviews and Drama

I think if people took the time to communicate during the session and after. A lot of BS will be cut down and feelings will not be hurt. I guess people need to be adults. Open up their mouth. Instead of being so mean and rude.

Now some situations are unique. People flat out lying on reviews or lying about the client. Treated ouright badly (either party).

Lisa

[Krunkman]

Originally Posted by chelsea simms

Whatever happened to if you don't have anything good to say just keep your mouth shut?

That's the whole point of the board... the "CIE" of "ECCIE" - Community Information Exchange.

It would be pointless if all we ever heard was good stuff. Information, good and bad, is a valuable commodity. As with the good reviews, the bad ones help fill in what's known about providers (and hobbyists). We all know information gets exchanged on the forums, in private, and via back channels.

Some providers DO provide a bad service, just as some hobbyists DO give the hobby a bad name. It's your reputation you are working with, so polish or tarnish it as you will. Most people do actually look a little into the reviews and form their own opinion anyways.

[npita]

Originally Posted by Hobbyfun

But lets say I walk in to a providers place and after 5 are 10 minutes they was no chemistry and I wanted to leave I would have to leave my donation and get nothing but if I asked for it back I would play hell getting it then the provider would write something on here are 411 and I would be the ass

And rightly so. Chemistry is something no one can promise you, so the right thing to do is pay for the time you scheduled unless the provider offers you some other option. After all, she's there and ready to take care of you and I really doubt she feels the chemistry either (even when you do). The right thing to do when writing a review is to be objective and acknowledge that the provider was there and on time (if she was), did what you expected her to do (if she did) and mention that you just didn't feel any chemistry. Objective reporting requires you to not lay blame where none exists.

Getting ready for a session takes time from the provider and the client plus the client has the gas and extra time traveling to and from the in call so we are both out something to begin

Doing anything you haven't done before requires some risk and chemistry is something no one can guarantee. It's not anyone's fault if your personalities clash, but you aren't being deprived of what you were sure of getting.

They is no difference between a man getting ready and driving to a provider's place then leaving and a provider getting ready for a client and him leaving are asked to leave they both have time invested and they both lose a little.

This is not dating. It's a business and unlike a date, you've scheduled an appointment that may have caused a provider to pass on someone else. If you want to eliminate the business aspect of meeting women, try dating.

I'm sure I have missed something here and sure somebody is going to point it out so let the stones start fly.

You missed the fact that a provider set aside time for you instead of the next person that called based on her belief that you would be paying for the time. If you want to be iffy about whether or not you are going to go through with it based on your subjective impression of chemistry, tell her up front so she gives you an iffy time when she doesn't have someone else who will pay her for the time.

[Hobbyfun]

NPITA don't get upset with me I was saying that might be a way of handling all the drama.

Your right it is a business transaction as far as I'm concerned if I don't connect with a lady I will stay and try and make the best of it are just leave, the donation to ME is nothing, what I am saying is there is to many people on here getting pissey and the drama starts over a couple of hundred bucks.

To make this clear in my opinion this is like Vegas if you can't afford to lose ever now and again then don't play.

But what I'm saying is if the lady does not click fell the chemistry then more than likely she is not going to be on her A game and should be business like and decline the session before it starts, same goes for the guys, but most guys would take a bad session then bitch about it before they would lose two hundred bucks.

I think a lot of ladies on here would do that but I also think a lot of ladies would not do that and that is were some of the drama comes from.

The problem is some of these ladies are hurt by the recession too and need ever session they can get and instead of doing the professional thing and declining they will take the cash and do a half ass session.

Not all but some, all I was trying to do is help get a solution.

I fell I have been lucky One bad session about 10 years ago a couple were the chemistry was not they but it was OK, and the rest good to great sessions and as far as Dallas goes we have some of the finest ladies out there.

[BossyWillson]

Originally Posted by Hobbyfun

I have noticed almost ever time they is a bad review drama follows it, and if you read between the lines most of the time the two people just did not click.

Now before you start throwing stones I'm sure they are some truly bad providers out there but I think most bad reviews are because the provider and the client just had no chemistry are did not click.

What is sad is the unrelated outing that it caused.
Sorry but 1+1=2

[DFK Hunter]

I'm apologize if I sound trite or snippy, but why does the drama surprise anyone?

By definition, the hobby engages the most powerful emotions known to humans. And yet many are surprised and awestruck when people get emotional. Color me unimpressed, but drama is going to occur whenever you mix sex & money. Period, end of story, it's gonna happen, so chin-up, buck-up, and learn to deal with it.

Remember, a provider can reasonably make the connection that a bad review (or even negative remarks in an overall good review) will have a negative impact to their income and livelihood. A fact that is true for all of us.

A couple of years ago I received what I thought was an unfair review at work and it DID have a negative affect on my livelihood. But just like the provider who has more good than bad reviews the effect was only temporary. However, even though later events vindicated me, I was very distraught at the time, and yes, dramatic.

It's hard enough to have one's work critiqued, we do it all the time at my place of employment as standard practice, and honest criticism/suggestions can sometimes generate emotional reactions there too. Now look at it from the providers viewpoint, if you criticize her work couldn't a reasonable person conclude you are criticizing her? After all, what is the commodity that is being bought and sold? HER time, HER companionship, HER affection...
It takes a very mature and confident person to handle criticism well in any endeavor. But let's face it, criticism in the hobby is very personal and based on emotion. Think about this:

Did y'all "click"? Emotional and Personal in content.
YMMV? Emotional and Personal in content.
Was she GFE? Emotional and Personal in content.

On an on...

Why does Dallas have more drama? More activity means more opportunities means increased likelihood for drama. Larger community means increased chance feelings will get out of hand. Simple really.

Can it be managed? To a degree yes. The mods & owners generally do a good job of managing the opportunities people have to express their drama; however, there is a fine line between managing drama and suppression of information exchange. The two will always be in conflict.

Again I strive to make the point that we literally hobby with the most powerful emotions known to humans. The intense power of Love/Lust/Desire is really only a razors edge away from fear and anger. I cannot emphasize this point enough; this is an emotionally driven hobby, therefore people will get emotional. And if that's not recipe enough for drama for you, throw money into the mix and drama is guaranteed. Don't believe me, then why is money one of the top reasons given for divorce?

Want more Proof? Here it is:

(1) Hobby = Money + Sex
(2) Sex = Emotions + Personal
(3) Drama = Emotions + Personal + Money
Substitute (2) into (1)
(4) Hobby = Money + Emotions + Personal
Therefore by the Associative Property:
(5) Hobby = Drama
QED