A Question for the Long Timers

[npita]

I've only been at this for a little under two years, so I've only seen hobbying, escorting, whatever you want to call it, as it is now. For those of you who have been doing this for at least 10 years, how has the provider/client interaction changed in the last 10 years? 20 years? I don't mean in terms of risk, ripoffs, etc., but in terms of how you interact with providers/clients at a personal level when your appointments go as planned.

[Top Gun]

Biggest change is technology. The personal client-provider relationship issues are basically the same.

[guest123009]

npita, I have only been doing it for a little longer than you and cannot even imagine getting into this without the internet. Where would you start?! I doubt I would have seen a SW. Even more importantly, the internet has helped me find other guys in the hobby which has led to meeting several ladies that are UTR.

[Chevalier]

Originally Posted by npita

For those of you who have been doing this for at least 10 years, how has the provider/client interaction changed in the last 10 years? 20 years? I don't mean in terms of risk, ripoffs, etc., but in terms of how you interact with providers/clients at a personal level when your appointments go as planned.

About 35 years now.

Obviously, there have been very significant changes in the physical aspects. When I first started, way before the AIDS crisis, condoms were used very rarely. DATY was not a big factor, and the focus was much more on pleasing the customer than mutual pleasure. It was much more about "service" than what we would call GFE today. And 15 - 20 years ago, CBJ rather than BBBJ was the norm. (For that matter, screening was minimal to non-existent.)

If you're asking about how personal interaction has changed, for P4P in general, I'm not sure I know. I can speak to my own experience, but it's not necessarily typical and also may reflect changes in me more than changes in the nature of P4P.

Excluding AMPs -- I went through about 12 years where that was my main outlet, but they're significantly different for a number of reasons -- I think there is more of a personal connection than many years ago. More long-term regulars whom I see a dozen or more times; more getting to know them on a personal level; more them getting to know me.

Some of that may be changes in me, as I've gotten older, but I think it's mostly a result of the external environment, largely technologically driven. 30 years ago, you had ads in the Yellow Pages or the back page of the Observer. Now the ladies have websites or detailed ads that give you a flavor of their personality. 30 years ago, there was little or no interaction outside of the session itself. Now we have discussion boards where we can get to know each other, and the actual face-to-face interaction is only a fraction of the total interaction we may have. (Somewhat amazing when you stop to think about it.) For that matter, there may be some interaction by phone or email, whereas in the past it was exceedingly rare. 30 years ago, the other party was mostly a mystery before the door opened. Now we have "both-way screening," where the ladies get information about clients, not just from traditional screening but also from talking with other ladies he's seen, and the clients get information about the ladies from reviews. Of course, with all of that sense of "community" comes less privacy.

Note: all of this is in the context of the medium- to high-end independent. The changes are probably much less if you look at streetwalkers or AMPs. For that matter, CL/BP are much more like the classified ads of 15 or 20 years ago, at least until the lady gets more exposure from a review site.

[guest040711-1]

I've been addicted to sex for nearly 40 years and can echo what Chevalier has stated.

The tecnology has lessened the bait and switch, and made it easier to feed the addiction.

[TexTushHog]

About 30 years here. And I agree with what Chavalier said. First and biggest difference is condoms are de rigeur now. In the first few years I was in the hobby, they were rare. Also technology has changed the hobby exponentially. In the old days, hi tech was finding a yellow pages that people had written notes in. You were shittin' in high cotton when you found that in a new town. Today, that would be unheard of as there would be multiple reivews on multiple review sites. And agencies don't have the power they used to. The internet has enabled the rise of the independent escort much more than you can imagine if you weren't around in the old yellow pages days. You show up in a new town and you usually just start cold calling in the yellow pages.

[Justaroadwarrior]

I would echo what TexTush and Chevalier have said about the yellow pages being the primary starting point in scheduling a session. my experience found that usually the yellow pages phone number was to an agency. (Makes me wonder know how offen that number/agency was really a scheduler in today's world?) When traveling the appointments were always at your hotel. Provider incall was an unknown to me during the 80's.

When looking for p4p in Dallas, the studio's up in Frisco along Hwy 121 and Preston Rd were a regular stopping point.

Internet has drastically changed the environment of our hobby.

[foX]

This summer will be my 40th anniversary of paying for sex a la carte. My first experience, oh those 40 years ago, was with an AA lady about 10 years older than me and I lasted all of 10 minutes and cost me twenty bucks, and there was not a condom in sight. And I’ve never looked back.

Over the ensuing pre-internet years, I have probably dialed for thousands of babes out of the yellow pages and other sources, and probably no more than 1 in 25 turned out to be an exceptional time. I would have a cash and dash, then some nasty looking troll, and I’d swear off calling out of the yellow pages for a while and try my luck at strip joints. Through the 80’s I even dated a couple strippers.

I guess the point is, from 1969 until I discovered sex on the Internet around 1997, commercial sex was pretty much hit or miss—mostly miss. A few nice, pretty girls with good service and a host of wham bam thank you hookers with the occasional rip-off and scary beast. Then I found Sweet Sarah’s Escort America, Charles Kelly’s Big Dog, and low and behold there was information. Pictures. Reviews. Wow. So while the type of experiences available did not change that much, all this new information insured that the you were far more likely to find whatever you were looking for on the first try.

But the real change was the end of isolation. Hunting for sex in the yellow pages, the strip clubs, and the brothels was a lonely and solitary endeavor. Agency girls snuck into your hotel, you parked in the back of the strip club and never made eye contact with your fellow patrons. You did not talk about your excursions into the world of paid sex with anyone, and when you went to a bachelor party at a strip bar you feigned ignorance to your friends.

With the advent of the Internet I was suddenly in virtual touch, via the boards and emails, with dozens, even hundreds of like minded sex addicts. In addition, the Internet allowed ladies who wanted to be sex workers to be in business independent of a brothel, and agency, or a pimp. The consequence of this new influx of “independents” was that the customer found himself in direct contact via phone and email with the provider. Inevitably, this led to relationships between customers, and between escorts, and between customers and escorts that no one even contemplated.

In early 2000 Roadking and I hosted a luncheon at Patrizio’s where we invited about a dozen of Dallas’s best known and most popular internet escorts. We enjoyed a fine lunch, paid the bill, and then left the ladies to get to know each other better. While I could be wrong, that was probably the first organized escort social in DFW, and probably one of the first in the country. Back then, we had no idea where it would ultimately lead.

Sex and women have not changed. But the bottom line is that the Internet has profoundly changed the way we interact with one another. No longer is each independent escort and each customer an island in a black and silent sea, but for better or worse we are part of a huge network of like minded people.

One can still be lonely in the big city, but the days of being alone are over.

[St.Mateo]

Fox

That is one hell of a post,sums up pretty much the way it was and now the way it is!

[Artie Lange]

Don't forget the fox files.

I was lucky to have all the sneaking around down by those before me. I have never know a hobby where there was not the internet or review boards. I shudder to think how bad I would have Forrest Gumped it without those tools.

[TexTushHog]

One point that shouldn't be missed in all the griping about old times. It's not like we really walked five miles to school in the snow uphill both ways. At least in the two or three cities that I traveled to a lot, I found a good agency in each one of the towns. But finding that agency did take some time and lots of trial and error. But once you found a good one, it really wasn't that bad. At least until they went out of business, changed ownership, etc. So it might not have been quite as bad as we make it sound, but today is worlds better.

[Sir Lancelot]

I had to smile at the comments about the yellow pages. I had my first taste of P4P in the spring of 1978. 31 years ago - hard to believe.

I think I've told this tale before, but after my first visit, it's amazing I ever hobbied again.

I was in traveling and was in Austin, & while I had been looking at the yellow page ads for a year or two, still had not gotten up my nerve. But that night I called a number and within 30 minutes, not one, but 2 girls show up at my hotel door. One was a cute little dark haired spinner, the other not so hot (understatement). Turned out the idea was the little cute spinner was there with the credit card manual machine to scan my credit card, and the other girl was my "date". Yes, I used my credit card (still have the receipt believe it or not), something I have never done again. LOL.

Well had I known what I do now, I would have demanded the cutie stay, but I was really nervous and just went with the flow. Huge mistake. The "clerk" soon left and things went down hill very fast. I was nervous, she was more nervous. I'm pretty sure it was her first time too. She didn't even want to take all her clothes off and when she did I could see why. Flabby, out of shape, etc. I'm not trying to be rude, but it was awful. I could not even begin to get hard, and after 15 minutes or so, I sent her on her way. Without a doubt that was the worst session I have experienced in the 31 years of this.

But I couldn't get that dark haired spinner out of my mind. So 2 days later I tried again and a beautiful tanned hispanic girl showed up. About 5' 2" X 100 lbs, nice breasts, and was what we today call a real GFE. I remember she kept trying to climb on without a condom and was shocked I wanted her to wear one. One of the sweetest, kindest girls i have ever met. We had a terrific time and I was totally hooked.

Have things changed? In some ways. It was mostly studio driven for a long time. Industrial Blvd/Irving Blvd from Commerce to Mockingbird was lined with them from 1975-85. I had a long time ATF down there - my first. When those were closed, the Hwy 21 studios opened. AMPS first started opening in Dallas in the 80's. I've been in love with asian women ever since.

The internet has made it more foolproof, but the relationships are much the same. The guys are the permanent part of the hobby, the girls are like a soft summer rain. Sweet, refreshing, and gone far too soon. I've liked almost all of them and admitedly loved a few. I've had just 4 true ATFs over the 31 years, and only one, a tiny asian independent, is still working in Dallas at this time.

So 31 years later, here I am. You know what's interesting? I can't recall all the names, but I bet I can tell you the places and some details about 99% of the sessions over that time. Many, many wonderful times and people. It is definitely not all about sex.

[Kit-4-Kat]

Originally posted by Sir_Lancelot:

So 31 years later, here I am. You know what's interesting? I can't recall all the names, but I bet I can tell you the places and some details about 99% of the sessions over that time. Many, many wonderful times and people. It is definitely not all about sex.

You are so right, Sir! That comment made me feel all warm & runny. Nicely done!

On topic, my mom was actually a dancer who occasionally turned tricks so she is grateful for the internet's heightened security features in the world of sex work. She doesn't worry too much about my safety when compared to some of her more harrowing experiences. Once, she was kidnapped and put into "holding" at a whorehouse in south Texas. Basically, she worked but all her earnings were held for the bastard who placed her there. He moved her to another house in Nevada where my mom was able to tell her story to the Madame who had her henchmen beat the hell out of the guy before turning Mom loose w/ her earnings. Crazy stuff, huh??

They glorify whorehouses like the Bunny Ranch, but I much prefer being independent and in control of who I see when and where. Being my own boss gives me greater confidence which trickles down to my clients, of course.

Great topic and comments. Loved hearing your stories.

[ControlFreak]

It has be 52 years since my first P4P. I was born in a little town along the Ohio River. We had what we affectionately referred to as Butt Huts. Basically they were whore houses. I am not sure rubbers had been invented yet, but no one used them. There were about 6 of these facilities in an alley that was in the wholesale district of town. We are talking about before integration there were facilities that white girls worked and facilities that black girls worked. Now the white males went to both depending on how much money you had. The black girls charged $3.00 and the white girls charged $5.00 and guys that included a trip around the world. On the weekends some of these places were so busy; you took a number and waited your turn. The girls would appear at the top of the stairs totally naked, if it was your turn you went up, if you didn’t want her someone else would go up with her and you waited for the next available for your number. We are talking being in High School and going to these facilities. If the cops would ride down the alley and ask you what you were doing? You were going to Mike’s Spaghetti House at the end of the alley. About twice a year the cops would bust the facilities and take the girls in, they would pay a $100.00 fine and be released. This was how they collected their taxes.

After college I got married and settled down for about 15 years. Then the GoGo girls started and I started going to those bars and I can’t tell you how many of those girls I shacked up with. They became more strip clubs and I was a regular. I then had some affairs with one of my Secretaries, That was too stressful, sure glad when she moved away. Then back to street walkers and strippers. From there to the Yellow pages for escorts and agencies, and in 1992 having been divorced since 1988, I took a job traveling the entire USA. The first 2 years traveling the East Coast and the next 8 years the entire country. I spent much time in strip clubs everywhere I went. If I struck out, I would use the yellow pages. I will never forget Charlotte, NC in 1994 there were about 40 pages of escort ads in the Yellow pages. We are talking the heart of the Bible Belt. Tammy Faye and Jimmy Baker were preaching up a storm there. I stayed in that town 85 nights one year and don’t think I slept by myself 15 of them. That town had more available strippers than Escorts. The night man at the desk at the hotel I stayed at would comp me the Penthouse Suite because he knew the eye candy would be great that night. Of course I would never let him down.

Moved here in middle 1994 then I was traveling the US and flying out of here was really easy. When on the road it was still strip joints and Escort agencies. Here I used DO and a couple of more of the Tabloids. The first Internet site I found was DFWNITEs.COM They reviewed strip joints and had a few hookers advertising there. I met Caressa from that sight. She showed up at my house and she was one of the most beautiful ladies I had ever seen. We became friends and I saw her often. That sight also introduced me to The Texas Golden Girl who at that time was a dancer at the Casino Royale before Duncan bought it. Along about that time I decided I was going to make money on Porn and started a website www.USADIVAS.COM. I had some of Dallas finest ladies on there. While I lost about $20,000.00 in two years, I sure did get laid a lot. The nice thing I was making good money and could write off my losses on my income taxes. All was very legal. About that time I found out about ASPD and joined in July 2000. I can honestly say while it has changed considerably with the drama, it certainly made find quality women and considerably easier. While during this entire period of time, IO have seen it go from totally unprotected sex to ridiculously protected sex and now while I still believe in covered FS and have never attempted Greek but would want that protected. To now BBBJ are the norm again, DFK is the norm again. There are many more beautiful ladies than at any time in the past. I have lived through the sexual revolution of the seventies to basically free love today. I can honestly say it is better today than any time in the past that I have experienced. Sex is no longer dirty; people are enjoying different sexual partners in greater numbers. People realize they can have sex without being married. People are experimenting with different sexual acts. Basically people of the US are learning to enjoy sex and various sexual partners. I will be the first one to say my being divorced was the greatest break in my life. I have had an opportunity to do what I want with who I want a get my satisfaction how I want. I do understand men and women married running around. There is nothing more boring than sex with the same person for 25 years. I think continual sex with the same provider can even become a little boring. Variety is the spice of Life and I love spice.

[pjorourke]

Originally Posted by foX

In early 2000 Roadking and I hosted a luncheon at Patrizio’s where we invited about a dozen of Dallas’s best known and most popular internet escorts. We enjoyed a fine lunch, paid the bill, and then left the ladies to get to know each other better.

And then there was that great party in 2004...