Reinventing your self an inquiry into ethics

[Wayward]

Reinventing your self an inquiry into ethics.

This issue was touched on in Austin and the agenda got in the way of what seemed to me to be a very interesting topic. Most of us believe in second chances, hell third chances and even more sometimes. But at what point do the transgressions of the past become serious enough to warrant being linked to a new identity. Everyone makes mistakes few more than I have, but this has been running around my feeble noggin for a couple of weeks. Some of the sharpest minds around post here and while there might be a little bit of mod shopping going on D&T seemed like a better place and if it doesn't run off the rails to far this could be a very spirited discussion.

We have some thoughts on this issue and maybe a couple of examples with out becoming to adversarial. However I’d like to let the interesting minds here have a shot at this topic before trying to steer it in any particular direction.

Providers change names for all sorts of reasons, over the years we have even helped a couple get out of some pretty tight spots with ex whatevers, family or co-workers. I’m really not talking about that aspect of it but we can if that catches your whimsy or seems the core issue to you. Instead I would like to focus on pretty serious mistakes, which are of ones own choosing. At what level do they become serious enough to where most or at least a significant portion of the people here believe it is acceptable either in a back channel or more openly to link those acts or former nom de guerre with the new persona.

[pjorourke]

What? You mean providers sometimes change their name? I'm shocked!!

[Wayward]

This just in, that money you gave her is not a loan...

[Naomi4u]

I don't see anything wrong with it. I have done it before (Client showed up at family Christmas party/long story) and If I had to I would do it again. Changing your name isn't deceitful. Having 10 different personas is.

[Wayward]

Originally Posted by Naomi4u

I don't see anything wrong with it. I have done it before (Client showed up at family Christmas party/long story) and If I had to I would do it again. Changing your name isn't deceitful. Having 10 different personas is.

Naomi that is exactly the issue that I would really like to address, in your mind one or two name changes is fine but 10 active personas are a serious red flag. I agree completely no one begrudges you a name change in the situation you describe, most of us would even try and help you if we could.

[NinaBrooke]

This is some of the topics that are really up to a person. I only once changed my website adress due to someone threatening me , so at least the handle was not correct anymore. I never changed my persona. I am too lazy for that. All that branding, advertising , etc.

I see nothing wrong with it, just something i wouldn`t do. What i try to avoid being exposed to people that could potentially threaten me is that i use high class photos, so i can always deny that this is me in the picture. I`d never use photos where its possible to easy identify people. None of the lingerie i wear in any of these photos are mine. Its all styling. Some women use their personal underwear. Its a no-do for me. Or use the same hairstyle they usually wear.
Modelphotos look different. Even though i am physically the person in the photos, nothing of my body is touched up or stuff, it`s hard to nail it down and say that this is definetely me, since they do look kind of ethereal, which was the task i tried to have fulfilled.
Some providers use photos where they are (even with blurred faces) very easy to identify, be it with clothes, hairstyles and stuff like that. I have my hair in these photos like i never wear them in private ever.

So name changes and different handles only work in my eyes if you try to approach it really professional - which includes professional photos and a professional coaching either.
Name change or changing handles is not really useful if you then continue to make the same mistakes again, simply because escort boards and the internet make it easy to target providers. No matter how often you change identity.

I think i would be too lazy for that , besides after a while you do become a brand. And to loose that name means starting all over again.

So to the initial question: If a provider is a ripp off sure you can use handles to identify her. Many do. But that means a provider probably did not successfully reinvent herself. Plus, real ripp offs never have homepages....Its too hard to maintain. Other than that....I don`t see a point in trying to identify potential reinvented women.

[pjorourke]

I think there are three aspects of this question. Let me propose three labels to to simplify discussion.

1. Is the Stalker where a lady changes her name because of a stalker or because she was outed to her friends/family. I think most of us don't have any problem with this situation. In fact I know a number of ladies here that have had this unfortunate experience and have dealt with it through name changes.

2. Lets call the Serial name changer where a lady for whatever reason is up to the 10 names wayward described. One or two could be stalkers, but maybe there is some running away from bad reviews or shabby business practices thrown in there two.

3. As Nina noted, your name is your Brand and some ladies operate multiple brands for various reasons (e.g., a low price, an HDH, etc.) Are these even name changes, since they exist in the market at the same time?

Can anyone think of another situation?

[Guest050715-1]

I changed my name after I came back because of my ex. But I contacted all my old friends via PM’s and told them who I was. When it seemed that my ex didn’t care anymore, I linked my old reviews and name on TER.

Changing your name doesn’t achieve anything. There were people that have contacted me (that either don’t know about TER or before I linked them about a year ago) to ask if I was Tara. The weirdest part is they said the writing style was just as familiar as the photos.

All things being equal, I would have come back as Tara, but oh well.

[pjorourke]

Originally Posted by ninasastri

Some providers use photos where they are (even with blurred faces) very easy to identify, be it with clothes, hairstyles and stuff like that. I have my hair in these photos like i never wear them in private ever.

How do you deal with distinctive tattoos?

[Valerie]

Originally Posted by pjorourke

How do you deal with distinctive tattoos?

Some ladies photo shop them out I suppose, I get asked sometimes why do I blur my face if I'm going to show the huge tat on my side...Which is a very valid question. I don't really blur my face because of LE, more so because I like the intrigue of a guy sort of being able to see some of my features, and want to see more....

The main reason I choose to show my tattoo is because here in the states, sometimes guys think if you have a professional photo then you're automatically using someone else's pictures. So by me allowing my tattoo to show, no one can ever accuse me of using fake pictures...just the way I do things...everyone's different...

[pjorourke]

Originally Posted by OliviaHoward

All things being equal, I would have come back as Tara, but oh well.

Oh yeah! Tara. I'd completely forgotten. Of course, I'm getting to the point where I forget what I had for lunch.

[Naomi4u]

Originally Posted by OliviaHoward

I changed my name after I came back because of my ex. But I contacted all my old friends via PM’s and told them who I was. When it seemed that my ex didn’t care anymore, I linked my old reviews and name on TER.

Olivia,

In the case of a stalker, a name change will do absolutely nothing. Anyone can change their name but it takes time to build a new persona. I'm not talking about changing your name to get away from bad reviews but building a new persona to get away from a stalker client/an abusive boyfriend..etc. When a client shows up at your family's Christmas party and tries to out you, you'd wouldn't be just changing your name. I went through a whole makeover. One thing about reviews is they will always follow. If your service sucks people will put two and two together. However, I had awesome reviews onTER (my goldmine) and asked to be delisted after that christmas party. It was painful. I regretted it until I joined eccie.

Originally Posted by Wayward

Naomi that is exactly the issue that I would really like to address, in your mind one or two name changes is fine but 10 active personas are a serious red flag. I agree completely no one begrudges you a name change in the situation you describe, most of us would even try and help you if we could.

I have friends that have 10 personas and you know what? I don't knock them. I don't have the time to be 10 people. I rather just be the best me I can be and provide top notch service. I hate the fact that people associate changing your name/persona as trying to get away from a bad reviews (even when you never had a bad review).

I emailed all my clients after that little episode Wayward and they were more than supportive. You were right.

Changing your name doesn’t achieve anything. There were people that have contacted me (that either don’t know about TER or before I linked them about a year ago) to ask if I was Tara. The weirdest part is they said the writing style was just as familiar as the photos.

Big difference betwen changing your name and having a new persona. A lot of escorts have two identical websites, different names, same rates.. and it's like why? Ugh!

[pjorourke]

Originally Posted by Naomi4u

A lot of escorts have two identical websites, different names, same rates.. and it's like why? Ugh!

I agree why? What sense does it make to maintain two identical brands. I can actually understand having a high-price and a low-price brand. Some people thinks that's wrong, but to me it makes good business sense.

Can anyone think of a good reason to do two identicals?

[Naomi4u]

Originally Posted by pjorourke

I agree why? What sense does it make to maintain two identical brands. I can actually understand having a high-price and a low-price brand. Some people thinks that's wrong, but to me it makes good business sense.

Can anyone think of a good reason to do two identicals?

Exactly.

London and I were laughing at this the other day. The girl had 2 different websites, 2 different names but same rates ($300hr). She had one site "Dana adams" and another site "Stacy Taylor". On her Stacy Taylor site, she signed her bio page "xoxo, Dana Adams" Classic!

(I changed her name to protect her identity btw.)

I wanted to email her and say "Ya might want to change that" but she'll learn.

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I have a friend that's based out of South Africa. Her main site is $300 and her
second site is $3500 for 3 hours minimum. She does pretty well for herself lol.

[NinaBrooke]

Originally Posted by pjorourke

How do you deal with distinctive tattoos?

I know....:-)...... good point - that`s one flaw, a risk i took consciously....but but....no one can ask me to pull my pants down...:-)
and those who can also know i am an escort :-). My whole family knows. My person is not concnerned about family members or friends finding out what i do.

My concerns are rather if i happen to have a regular job and my employee finds out. Or complete strangers (stalkers) going berserk and publicly announcing names. These people can hardly ask me to pull my pants down.

But you are right.....risk risk.....i am not sure yet if i shall cover my tats or not. In Europe it never has been an issue. I am not so certain what will happen in the USA once i am here.