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01-13-2015, 03:04 PM
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#1
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Account Disabled
User ID: 262467
Join Date: Sep 29, 2014
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 708
My ECCIE Reviews
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Can Providers and Hobbyists be JUST FRIENDS?
Okay, I had to bring this subject up...ladies, how do you feel about it? Is it something that's possible? Can clients turn into friends, or is it something that needs to be addressed when a client begins to consider you his friend? Does it put up red flags? And as for the men in the hobby, have you ever had a close friendship with a provider? Did it ever end badly? Share your thoughts on the subject, everyone.
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01-13-2015, 03:17 PM
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#2
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Jul 2, 2014
Location: Dallas
Posts: 1,061
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If a gent (who might happen to also be a hobbyist) and a lady (who happens to be a provider) meet outside the hobby, then yes a personal friendship is possible.
If however, in the more likely case that they meet within the boundaries of the hobby, the answer is a qualified no. A "business" friendship would be established, much like one you'd find in the civilian workplace among co-workers or business associates. Way too many opportunities for disappointment otherwise. Been there, done that, got the tee shirt and it stinks.
Of course much of this depends on a persons definition of friendship...
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01-13-2015, 03:19 PM
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#3
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Mar 29, 2009
Location: Fort Worth
Posts: 251
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I have had relationships with women in the hobby, as in live-in girlfriends, as well as women outside this deal. For the most part the relationships with women that weren't escorts ended much worse
Of course they all ended somewhat badly otherwise they wouldn't end.
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01-13-2015, 03:27 PM
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#4
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Sanity Check...
Join Date: Mar 31, 2010
Location: North texas
Posts: 12,569
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To answer your question Slim..., yes, they can be friends.
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01-13-2015, 03:30 PM
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#5
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Nov 17, 2011
Location: Dallas
Posts: 1,783
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Yes they can be friends, but not fuck buddies or friends with benefits.
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01-13-2015, 03:34 PM
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#6
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Sep 23, 2010
Location: Dallas
Posts: 10,348
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It is possible to be friends and have a client/provider relationship at the same time or it can be turned just into a friendship as well. A lot depends on the client to keep the providers business her domain with help only when she requests it and show no jealousy with her relationship with her other clients.
I have lived with providers as a very supportive friend more than girlfriend and have also been married to a provider. Anything is possible if there is a proper understanding and a mix of the right personalities.
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01-13-2015, 04:07 PM
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#7
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Jan 5, 2014
Location: Arlington
Posts: 360
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Yes they can be friends, why not? I meet a few who I continue a relationship with, lunch, dinner, and whatever else, but It can be complicated.
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01-13-2015, 06:02 PM
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#8
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Feb 1, 2010
Location: Arlington
Posts: 2,103
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Absolutely they can be friends. Does it happen often? Don't know but my SWAG is, not very often. David Free might write about the parameters in which situation this could happen. I know what it would be for me and for the Provider. Have I experienced such- yes. Once and still continues as friends no benefits.
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01-13-2015, 06:14 PM
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#9
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Mar 28, 2012
Location: Tel Aviv
Posts: 6,287
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Quote:
Originally Posted by whitechocolate
It is possible to be friends and have a client/provider relationship at the same time or it can be turned just into a friendship as well. A lot depends on the client to keep the providers business her domain with help only when she requests it and show no jealousy with her relationship with her other clients.
I have lived with providers as a very supportive friend more than girlfriend and have also been married to a provider. Anything is possible if there is a proper understanding and a mix of the right personalities.
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Why the divorce from the provider?
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01-13-2015, 06:20 PM
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#10
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Jan 30, 2012
Location: Houston, TX but do travel on business
Posts: 4,841
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Yes
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01-13-2015, 06:27 PM
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#11
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Sep 23, 2010
Location: Dallas
Posts: 10,348
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Jewish Lawyer, we had a great relationship and everything was always very amicable. We just made a mutually workable change.
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01-13-2015, 06:44 PM
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#12
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Feb 6, 2010
Location: Irving
Posts: 135
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Yes
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01-13-2015, 06:45 PM
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#13
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DFW Spinner Goddess
User ID: 183399
Join Date: Apr 14, 2013
Location: DFW, Tx
Posts: 710
My ECCIE Reviews
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I personally think that yes a hobbyist & provider can be friends outside of the lifestyle BUT there are always the boundaries/guidelines that need to talked about and agreed upon first, along with talking about what would happen and should happen if those boundaries/guidelines are not followed.
Do I personally have friendships with the hobbyist that I've seen/know yes... but only to a certain an extent. A few things that (I personally think) must be kept in mind by both the hobbyist & provider as far as this goes is:
That we're human so naturally when two people hang out, spend enough time together and conversat about "personal life & issues" feelings can (and usually do) arise... how would you really deal with that?
You learn so much about that person you start to care for them and get feelings for them too, then the next thing you know you're jealous as hell cause your friend (the hobbyist) just posted a review on another provider... how are you going really to react to that? (Or vise versa - the hobbyist sees a new review posted about his friend (the provider) and reads the ROS, and gets jealous about it).
Or both of you end up having mutual feelings for each other (great) but she still has to work to pay her bills and sorry herself and he still wants to hobby... would either really truly be ok and happy with that? And if you both were gotta ask and wonder... for how long tho?
Really there's an upside to a friendship between the two and of course there's a downside also! So really in the end it would be up to you and your discretion... just be careful, be considerate, and set some boundaries or godliness or something to avoid having a bad falling out in the end... cause if that were to happen you not just lose a client but more you lose a friend, same with the gentlemen... they lose not just a provider/ATF but they also lose a friend.
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01-13-2015, 06:56 PM
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#14
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Account Disabled
Join Date: Feb 12, 2010
Location: allen, texas
Posts: 6,044
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Slim.
Okay, I had to bring this subject up...ladies, how do you feel about it? Is it something that's possible? Can clients turn into friends, or is it something that needs to be addressed when a client begins to consider you his friend? Does it put up red flags? And as for the men in the hobby, have you ever had a close friendship with a provider? Did it ever end badly? Share your thoughts on the subject, everyone.
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I know this was addressed to the ladies- but the answer is Yes- there are plenty of providers over the years that I have become friends- meaning we hang out- chat here and there with no expectations- it's very possible.
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01-13-2015, 07:03 PM
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#15
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Valued Poster
Join Date: Jun 19, 2011
Location: ALL OVER TEXAS
Posts: 2,686
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Ya or you can become post buddies on this board.
I miss JP
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