Halitosis

[Purrrsia]

I need advice. I have a "friend" who is great in every way: he's polite, generous, and no body odor...EXCEPT for his breath. It's not a little bad, it's really bad. How do I tell him? Should I greet him at the door with a face mask and a bottle of Listerine?

[Doc_rob]

Hand him a glass of Listerine when he walks in. I carry a small bottle of Cool Mint Listerine in my car and use it before I get to the door. I don't smoke so that probably helps too.

[Guest083013]

The old saying that "halitosis is better than no breath at all" is really rediculous and I think perhaps a gentle hint to him (or anyone for that matter) is in order.

There really is no way one can detect their own oral odor and it can be really embarrassing. Trouble is - its not always just what one has eaten recently but can be a sign of serious disorders in the mouth (buccal cavity) which might require medical and/or dental intervention.

Practicing good oral attention is always imperative for any interactions in today's society, but especially within this thing we call the hobby.

Great post Purrrsia and perhaps your gentleman friend is reading this. In the interim it might not be a bad idea to have mouth wash and/or other aids available for everyone at your incall.

And I agree Doc_rob - as a former smoker --- that can be a real turn-off too for many and harder to veil than other things.

[Laz]

I would guess he would actually like to be aware of the problem. Approach it politely and he will probably be grateful that you made him aware of the issue. Just think about all of the other social encounters he has where people are thinking but never saying anything to him.

[levi tab]

How about dropping a subtle hint, like asking if he just ate something with onions or something like that and letting him know that you have a new toothbrush and mouthwash in the restroom for him to use.

Normally the first thing I do when I arrive is ask to use the shower and be able to brush my teeth and rinse with mouthwash. This way the Provider knows that I'm clean and fresh and she doesn't have to hope that I came clean and fresh.

[Keyzer Soze]

You might consider have a tin of mints, in plain view, take one yourself and offer him one as well, the power of suggestion just might work. Touchy subject. Hope you're able to resolve the problem, in a gently manner.

[gimme_that]

Originally Posted by levi tab

Normally the first thing I do when I arrive is ask to use the shower and be able to brush my teeth and rinse with mouthwash. This way the Provider knows that I'm clean and fresh and she doesn't have to hope that I came clean and fresh.

You might want to refrain from brushing your teeth at so close a time to your appointment. When you brush your teeth your gums are liable to small cuts which heal quickly but no faster than thirty minutes or so. The saliva helps quickly with the healing process. During that time your mouth is more exposed to bloodborne pathogens through daty and kissing. So id stick with the mouthwash and mints if your waiting until you arrive.

[GTDak]

Wow poor Purrsia. I can totally picture you with watering eyes trying to smile.

[Likinikki]

Good topic Purrrsia! It's difficult for me to mention anything about bad breath...I don't want them to feel embarassed. I've tried all the tricks to *cover* the odor...but, it's very short lived if someone has chronic halitosis.

If someone has dental issues, sinus trouble, or gastro troubles...the problem won't be resolved until they get treatment.

Brushing the gums and tongue can be helpful...but, I wonder how many people actually do that? I always have breath strips on hand...cinnamon and mint...some people do not like that mint flavor.

If you find a good way to deal with this issue...please PM me!

[PAPILLON10]

Just have two glasses with listerine ready and toast with him for just seeing him. Or if you feel uncomfortable with this option, have two glasses of wine and toast. This way you will both have the wine taste and will not seem as bad.

[JacobJ]

I agree Purrrsia, good topic. There are so many ways us guys can embarrass ourselves, I lose count.

My very first provider in San Antonio offered me a mint as we were beginning play one time, and I took the hint. I scheduled a teeth cleaning the very next day (it had been years), and invested in a tongue scraper (which I'm convinced is the best way to combat bad breath). Now when I'm going for a play visit, I pack a travel bottle of Listerine and I give it a good swish at the convenience store bathroom right before going in. Not getting any complaints so I assume it's working.

Especially from a provider that I see regularly, I need/expect/want her to mention things that could improve our time together. I say, tell him. Maybe try a hint first.

Good luck!

[raedy4funn45]

Be honest and tell him. I for one would appreciate knowing somethng like that, and would not be offended.

[Guest080312-1]

Excellent thread, Babe, and I'm relieved to learn that I'm not the "offending party."

Dennis and Nikki raise an important point: there could be a serious underlying dental or gastrointestinal health issue.

For years, although nobody ever complained about my breath, I was acutely aware of a persistently foul, bitter and sometimes bloody taste in my mouth. I finally got sick and tired of trying to mask it with mints, gum, and mouthwash, and consulted a dentist -- who discovered a huge buildup of tartar beneath the gum line, and periodontitis in the making. $2,162.00+ worth of antibiotics and deep cleaning (done in two stages, under anesthetic) later, I enjoyed a marked, almost startling, improvement.

The issue that you and other ladies face is this: Do you simply want to spare yourselves the unpleasantness of bad breath during a session; or do you care enough about the gentleman to tactfully, yet directly, state your concerns?

For that matter, do you care enough about yourselves (and each other) to directly address it with the "offending" gentlemen? As I read gimme_that's point about brushing resulting in small cuts, and a brief vulnerability to bloodborne pathogens through DATY and kissing, it occurred to me that diseased gums (of which bad breath could be symptomatic) are open wounds through which you could get as receive as well as transmit, to the poor bastards, all sorts of pathogens.

If you decide against the easy way out, and directly (albeit tactfully) address the issue, you do risk losing your client; you have no guarantees he'd respond as positively as JacobJ, raedy4funn45, or I would. However, you can go to bed at night and sleep soundly, knowing that you've done the right thing, and that it's his problem -- not yours -- that he has taken offense.

[Guest102513-1]

Supposely one of the great things about the hobby is honest and open communication...yea I know with some on both sides of the fence it is not.

But in this situation, it appears to be all good.

So telling him is straight up is totally, the key is how you tell him.

Plus I think he would really want to know

[Guest101618]

If it is going to make our time together better, please tell me.