over cautious or not?

[angel23]

I got a call from a gentleman who said he was on eccie. I asked him to please confirm that by sending me a message. He did I noticed he had been a member for a year and had only posted once. I asked If he had any provider references and he stated he didn't. I then asked some questions to try and get a feel for this gentleman. When I asked for a business card pic to be sent he told me he was using Google voice. That was a red flag then proceeded to tell me his name was not the name he gave me more was he really employed where he had originally told me more red flags. Then I get a pic via a link on an online photo sharing site. Needless to say I did not see the gentleman was I over cautious or not?

[ahobbyist2]

From a hobbyist viewpoint- seemed like you acted correctly to me- it just didn't feel right- so you were better off staying on the right side of caution-

[katee]

I've always found it best to, as they say.. Follow your first instincts. I don't believe there is such a thing as being "too cautious"
This is YOUR life you are talking about. I believe we have an internal BS radar, use it.
I require that if a gentleman is interested, that he call me.
I find I get a better feel, also because of my posts and showcase, and my reviews....
If they are seeking companionship, hopefully they've read my reviews and know that I am who I say I am, and represent myself in a true fashion. Don't accept any less from someone you are considering seeing. With me it's either be straight up with me, or buddy, find someone who is desperate....as I am not, and will not tolerate any BS.

[Guest123018-2]

Always follow your instincts. Can save you from alot of trouble. I feel you done the right thing.

[tml]

Contrary to what Katee says....you CAN BE "too cautious." Or perhaps it's more accurate to say that you can be "ineffectively cautious" in this industry (Ginger's sticking her nipple in your mouth comes to mind, or asking "you're not affiliated with Law Enforcement, are you?" - as if a cop must answer that question truthfully.......neither of those will give you an "entrapment" defense). Katee IS ABSOLUTELY CORRECT in saying you should trust your instincts, though.

That said - I'm not sure this qualifies as "over-cautious"....to the guy's credit, it sounds like he was "coming clean" - but it's understandable that it was too little, too late. Of course it's always nice to give someone a 2nd chance to do the right thing in the first place - but in THIS industry, it's certainly NOT something you owe him. It'll be a good learning experience for him.

If he wants to see you, he'll learn from his mistakes with you, and use that experience to get a reference or two. And of course, once he does, he can come back, right?

[Runningoutoftime]

Go with your instincts, and also, go with the providers verification. If a guy can't come up with at least popular provider in like a millisecond, or at least a handle from a review site, there's probably something wrong, but it could be a newbie.

As for myself, I get overly nervous the first time I meet a provider. And sometimes it's shows. Lol, I had one provider meet me at a location, we meet outside, and in the stairwell of the hotel we both do a cop kiss and touch test. We are both good, walk towards the room, and there is a guy that's looks like a cop getting in the elevator. Two steps down the hall she darts, well not really darts, but turns around. I'm not one for cause a scene, so I keep walking to the room. Finally after 20 min, she says I was setting her up and Blah blah blah. So there was no reasoning. I lost nothing, and she was out the gas money to travel to me.
So a few months pass and I'm in her area, and set up an appointment. She get there, doesn't even realize it it me! After a good 5 min of BJ, I tell her, and remind her... Lol we both had a good laugh about it too!

[katee]

TML.. I wouldn't call asking if one was LE, cautious. I would call it not being familiar with the law. Perhaps, I should've just said, use your instincts, and left it at that. Even with gathering real life info on a gentleman who shows interest, if I don't "feel" right about it... I won't set an appointment. Discretion IS important to me, for both parties involved. I also won't give a provider reference unless the gentleman has contacted me prior, asking if it's okay. Simply as a precautionary measure. I once was scammed by a wife who eventually revealed herself to me. Luckily, there wasn't a problem, but only because she opted to pray for my harlot soul rather than cause me grief. I stand on my belief...no such thing as being TOO cautious. I, for one, am not willing to compromise my well being for the sake of the price of a session.

[DallasRain]

always go with your "intuition"....not all money is good money

[tml]

Katee, my intention wasn't to say "you're wrong," but I understand why it came across that way. My apologies for not being clearer.

The point I was intending to make is that there is probably "too cautious" in procedure.....but completely agree with you that there is never "too cautious" when it comes to personal security/safety and your (or any provider's....or client's, for that matter) comfort level with the appointment and/or client.

[katee]

Kisses TML

[angel23]

of course I would give him a second chance if he called and said yes i have some references. I would be more than happy to see him.