BBBJ and DATY as more than just sex

[nycalcharlie2003]

This generally applies not so much to the hobby, but to those of us with SO's (even though the relationship may have changed) and those who have had meaningful affairs/relationships. I have come to view BBBJ and DATY as acts of affection rather than just sex acts. I always enjoyed slow, sensual BBBJs and I would often express affection for women by performing DATY - because it gave ME satisfaction as well. However, I have spoken with some providers - who give great BBBJ - and they have never seen oral as anything more than physical satisfaction.

A couple of years ago I had an affair with a lady I knew and on one occasion - the first time we were very sexual - she pulled my pants down and started giving me a BBBJ that was not only great but I definitely felt that she was saying "I love you". It was SO loving that I would not even describe it accurately as a BBBJ - more like making love to me with her mouth. Naturally, I returned the favor.

My question is - Am I the only one who feels this way? When you are with someone you love and care about, do you see oral as more loving or more physical satisfaction?

Charlie

[whitechocolate]

I agree totally with you. If you have had experience with tantra, that is exactly what great oral is all about. It can and often is done for hours and both the pussy juices and cum are viewed in a very special light as well.

[i34free]

I feel you bro. I think oral sex between meaningful partners is something more then just a mechanical act of sexuality. It signifies that you are trying to please your partner even if the giver gets nothing out of it, idk if there is something much more loving then that-giving. And there is the difference between actual lovers and providers. For a provider it is strictly a mechanical act, she does not do it to make you happy but to fulfill an agreement. Makes you think that there is more to sex then just mongering. I think females know this but at the same time, ultimately I believe they are actually bigger hobbyists then men, and are so much more easily. Nevertheless I think they realize the emotional value and significance of actually intimate relationships. Still love a nice bj tho and perhaps I prefer the emotional disattachment of client/provider interactions. For the same reason I don't engage in DATY with mysterious persons.

[SexyKaylen]

if u enjoy it!!! i say let us do it....couse i love giveing bbbj.....

[nycalcharlie2003]

i34Free- I agree - there is a BIG difference between lovers and providers. They are NOT supposed to be the same. There is an old expression - providers are not paid for sex, they are paid to leave after sex.

My point about the discussion with the provider is that she said she never viewed oral that way (even with someone with whom she was involved). Maybe she was BS'ing me, maybe giving so many BJ's had left her jaded.

I guess m main question is - do MOST guys see oral this way, or do they just view it as hot sex?

Charlie

[spice-is-nice]

Sexually I am modestly submissive, and by nature I am a pleaser. Therefore it is probably no surprise that I love DATY and see it as much much more than a mechanical act.

I trust my instincts about people, research my potential partners carefully, seeking those who are smart and funny and assertive and love to kiss and love sensual lovemaking. There ARE providers like that out there. Not all experiences are mind blowing (though MANY have been), but I've never had a terrible experience.

So I KNOW that it is possible to really click with a provider and have lovemaking which is way more than paint by numbers. For me, giving DATY is an incredible turn-on with a responsive partner--sexually, emotionally, intellectually, whatever, but I also love kissing and stroking her all over. I sometimes think it is like being in a play--if you thoroughly immerse yourself in the role you are playing then it feels completely real--to the point of blurring the boundary between fantasy and reality. . . . . .

[GabrielaSweetheart]

I can honestly say, I completely enjoy the sex and BBBJ and get way more into it when there's DATY involved. it gets the motor running and the blood flowing (;

[StephanieYoung]

I see it both ways, depending on my mood. For me, most of it is in how emotional I am that day. Down and dirty tends to be just sex, versus a slow passionate love-making session with them, in which it is all about the emotional connection. Oral can be more intimate, however at the end of the day, I think you will find for most women it is the mood that they are in that dictates if it is loving or physical.

[PrincessCat]

I love giving a good bbbj but DATY puts the ice ing on the cake

[awl4knot]

Charlie,
You are over-thinking this. Making love is different than having sex. Everyone gets that. The emotional components of oral sex are no different than the emotional components of intercourse between lovers. How much more intimate and "loving" can you get than gazing into your SO's enraptured face during mish? What could be more romantic than pushing each other to a simultaneous orgasm that symbolizes a couples devotion and unity? Don't you read romance novels?

Your dichotomy also seems to ignore the fact that the hottest and rauchiest sex can be between soul mates who trust each other and have active, imaginative libidos. The fact that you slapped her ass until it was red, pulled her hair in doggy and called her vile names of affection doesn't mean that you don't love her. To the contrary, your love is just being expressed more exuberantly than the soft focus romantic variety. Even soul mates look good in thigh highs and CFM heels.

So calm down and keep love and sex in perspective and enjoy them separately and together.

[Wizard of Ahhhhs]

Originally Posted by PrincessCat

I love giving a good bbbj but DATY puts the ice ing on the cake

Princess needs to take my Timex Girl Challenge..!!

[NachoN]

Yes. For me giving oral is a very sensual experience filled with lots of affection. A provider commented to me that my lips were so soft on her pussy. That's because I really do love the pussy and it shows in my DATY. ;-)

On the flip side, when a woman makes love to my cock with her mouth, ho boy! It's the best EVER!

[The_Seeker]

Originally Posted by nycalcharlie2003

This generally applies not so much to the hobby, but to those of us with SO's (even though the relationship may have changed) and those who have had meaningful affairs/relationships. I have come to view BBBJ and DATY as acts of affection rather than just sex acts. I always enjoyed slow, sensual BBBJs and I would often express affection for women by performing DATY - because it gave ME satisfaction as well. However, I have spoken with some providers - who give great BBBJ - and they have never seen oral as anything more than physical satisfaction.

A couple of years ago I had an affair with a lady I knew and on one occasion - the first time we were very sexual - she pulled my pants down and started giving me a BBBJ that was not only great but I definitely felt that she was saying "I love you". It was SO loving that I would not even describe it accurately as a BBBJ - more like making love to me with her mouth. Naturally, I returned the favor.

My question is - Am I the only one who feels this way? When you are with someone you love and care about, do you see oral as more loving or more physical satisfaction?

Charlie

I have had the same experience. The BBBJ/DATY were almost more meaningful than the intercourse. There were two scenarios playing out at the same time. The intercourse was just raw sexual energy from pent up deprivation, but the oral took on a whole different level, as you said, making love to each other with our mouths.

[SexyKaylen]

i love giveing bbbjcimnqns....the best ever

[angusranch]

Kaylen what about bbbjcimnqns..snowball?