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massageman73 · 01-27-2013, 09:27 PM

Let me pose a question here: Why do some providers request a pic of you via email before seeing you? Is that a red flag or just a safety issue for her? I had a provider do that to me recently during an email conversation and I'm not sure I wanna send a pic to anyone. Am I just being paranoid?

Sweet Melissa · 01-27-2013, 09:56 PM

If you are w/o references ... depending on the situation ... I may ask my military guys for an email with their military Id to verify ... also may ask for an email with DL with important stuff covered (hint: use white out - it scratches right off and covers perfectly) That's just to be sure you are indeed who you say you are - we have to be safe too

just do your homework and be sure you are sending it to someone discreet and trustworthy!!! Not someone questionable. go with your gut!! good luck

Sweet Melissa · 01-27-2013, 09:58 PM

BTW : I don't really care about seeing a picture if it isn't proving anything with screening!

vicinms · 01-28-2013, 08:11 AM

I think that is pretty rare and I'd be uncomfortable with it to! That said, I actually did it once with a UTR provider that I really wanted to see, but doubt I would ever do it again. I don't see how it would benefit the provider, other than to get an idea of what you look like if she is very selective of a guys appearance (can't imagine that in this hobby)! Just emailing a pic wouldn't prove someone wasn't LE, but I guess she would know that it matched whoever showed up at her door.

Like Melissa's example, I showed a provider my DL once (covered my name) so she could verify it matched my P411 ID, but that wouldn't work anymore because the # has now changed. I don't blame you for being paranoid, so unless you know she is a reputable provider (with plenty of reviews), I think I might look elsewhere!

Nicolet · 01-28-2013, 08:52 AM

That sounds more like a newbie provider request. I should know, that's how I found this board! LOL
Someone told me that some people on an internet site were talking smack about me, so I signed up to defend myself. I quickly learned, with the advice of some very nice folks, that asking for a pic is a bad idea. Which I completely understand now, but back then.... I was a demanding lil minx!
I've been pleasantly surprised with each new face I have met!

massageman73 · 01-28-2013, 10:54 AM

I just don't like the idea of emailing a pic of my face to a provider that is relatively new.

Miss39402 · 01-28-2013, 07:33 PM

It always raises a red flag with me, when someone asks me to send pics. I don't do it. After all, I put enough pics out there to get an idea of what I look like. The pics in addition to my reviews should give a good idea if I am who they want to meet. I have been told by several men that I need to show my face, but I have no desire to.

Guest080613-2 · 01-28-2013, 07:53 PM

I honestly like it when a man sends me a pic on his own accord, especially if he is a newbie. It shows me he is serious about booking. Others may have their own opinion about it, but...

massageman73 · 01-28-2013, 08:21 PM

Well Miss and Mina you have both seen my ugly mug, as well as the rest of me LOL, so that won't be necessary again, though I bet you don't remember me! However, Nicolet does

Guest080613-2 · 01-28-2013, 08:36 PM

U would be surprised lol who I do and don't remember

Nicolet · 01-28-2013, 09:31 PM

Calista_Syn · 01-28-2013, 11:01 PM

Sending a photo is part of my newbie screening process. Do I care what you look like? No, (Come on, lets be real here, look don't matter much to 99.99 of providers) but if you're a nobody in the scene, it makes me feel safer to to know your willing to put your face on it. I mean, I'm about to walk into a room with an unknown man... Who expects me to do lewd and unmentionable things to his body.. I'm risking everything.. If he's not willing to risk a photo, full name, and phone number (to start) then he can book a 60 dollar make you hollar chicks and be on his way.

This general argument baffles me really, the thought that men expect a woman to walk through their doors without much for security, or us knowing anything about you is absurd. This isn't the 60', we're not on street corners, and frankly you reap what you sow. If a woman is willing to come to you without screening you, you *should* be fearful. If you're worried about security, the women who are putting you through the ringer are probably your best bet. Logic says, if she's this diligent about the process, she's not getting caught up with law or undesirables, so she's safer no? You want easy and fast, call an agency or off brand female from BP. You want to feel secure that your date isn't going to call the wife, work, or otherwise ruin your life? Go with someone who has a vested interest in you *not* getting caught. You're worth a WHOLE lot more to me married at home with a good job than divorcing and broke.

Guest080613-2 · 01-28-2013, 11:21 PM

Amen to that calista!

biomed1 · 01-29-2013, 05:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Calista_Syn

Sending a photo is part of my newbie screening process. Do I care what you look like? No, (Come on, lets be real here, look don't matter much to 99.99 of providers) but if you're a nobody in the scene, it makes me feel safer to to know your willing to put your face on it. I mean, I'm about to walk into a room with an unknown man... Who expects me to do lewd and unmentionable things to his body.. I'm risking everything.. If he's not willing to risk a photo, full name, and phone number (to start) then he can book a 60 dollar make you hollar chicks and be on his way.

This general argument baffles me really, the thought that men expect a woman to walk through their doors without much for security, or us knowing anything about you is absurd. This isn't the 60', we're not on street corners, and frankly you reap what you sow. If a woman is willing to come to you without screening you, you *should* be fearful. If you're worried about security, the women who are putting you through the ringer are probably your best bet. Logic says, if she's this diligent about the process, she's not getting caught up with law or undesirables, so she's safer no? You want easy and fast, call an agency or off brand female from BP. You want to feel secure that your date isn't going to call the wife, work, or otherwise ruin your life? Go with someone who has a vested interest in you *not* getting caught. You're worth a WHOLE lot more to me married at home with a good job than divorcing and broke.

To play the other side of the coin...

SO, the newbie sends you a picture.
He also gives you a name, and a phone number.
Of these 3 items, the only one likely to be valid/real info is the phone number.
After all, he does want a call from you telling him that you are panting with desire to see him. (He is really looking forward to you doing lewd and unmentionable things to his body.

)

The one indisputable truth about this Hobby/Business that we share is that NOTHING IS FOOLPROOF.

In my limited experience, I have found that the essential element is a sense of TRUST between Hobbyist and Provider!
That trust is established in any number of ways:

Date-Check
RS2K
P411
Reference from another Provider/Hobbyist
Vouches from another board
OR, sharing whatever personal information you are comfortable in divulging.

Often establishing trust (on both sides) involves multiple interactions thru:

Text
Phone Calls
E-mail
PM's
OR, a public meeting.

These are not meant to be a definitive list, but rather a limited example of ways to become comfortable enough to see each other privately.

I must admit that I have never be asked to send a photo, (of me or Brad Pitt for that matter

) as part of my initial screening to visit a new Lady.

Trust is a highly sought after commodity, and is often greatly undervalued.
Once gained it is virtually priceless.
If care is not exercised in the way of discretion, civility, honesty, and common courtesy Trust is easy lost.
Often it can not be re-established!

Please note that I am not in complete agreement, nor in complete disagreement with anything posted earlier in this thread.
These are just my comments on the subject, based upon my limited experiences.

This has been a very well thought out and civil discussion on an often volatile subject.
One that I have enjoyed reading comments from both sides of the Hobby.

Be Careful & Enjoy!

Biomed1

Calista_Syn · 01-30-2013, 10:35 PM

Bio, it's hard for you to understand the newbie perspective like I do, or a gent with no standing does, Hell, when I first saw you all I had to do is search your name here and I had countless interactions and reviews to go on. You're super easy to schedule with!
It's not hard to validate info these days, with a name, photo, and phone number, Google can find facebooks, work websites, twitters, spokeo can even give me residential info. I love dealing with first timer newbies, and they rarely even know what p411 is.. So that elusive element of trust must come from a status quo with personal info. I agree totally, for my juices to flow, trust has to be present.