Confusing Menus

[EZ.]

After a session, a few days ago, I was talking with the girl and she mentions an item that is part of one of her packages. At the top she has the normal menu but below she has like bronze, silver and gold packages. Now, if you chose one of those, you can chose a certain number of other listed items ...I'm going WTF? I started asking about the items that were on the list and how many you could chose with each package. Honestly, I started laughing because she didn't know. Hell, you wrote it! Seriously, I'm not making fun, I liked this girl and I got her to laugh several times that evening. I'm sure that she gave this a lot of thought and it was articulate but men are not complicated, especially when they are hard as algebraic geometry (both a distant memory). I would need flow chart to help me figure this shit out.

I'm in Arlington and there is a hot girl within 15 minutes of me but after reading her menu, I'm out. She has a GFE menu, a L2 menu and then a L3 menu. I don't have a clue whats in the girl friend experience menu [it doesn't say] but I fucked every girl friend I've have had since middle school. After you get through a page of that she has this: "Yes, my husband knows what I do but this was my decision and he has decided to share." To me that is TMI.
Again, this is a hot girl that is obviously very bright. Excluding all of that, I would have already PM'd her.

[Phrasing]

Good point and now a rule in Canada is you can't describe what you offer. So the lovely p411 menu that says everything they do is deleted and you don't know!

[daty/o]

I'm waiting for them to start offering frequent flier awards. To me, it's just another way of upselling. Makes my decisions real easy; I don't see girls unless they are all inclusive. I don't want to have to work that hard.

[EZ.]

Originally Posted by daty/o

I'm waiting for them to start offering frequent flier awards. To me, it's just another way of upselling. Makes my decisions real easy; I don't see girls unless they are all inclusive. I don't want to have to work that hard.

I remember when banks would give you a toaster for opening an account. MSOG and a toaster.

[NTXReggie]

With you OP...GFE is about as vague as, well, experience with past girlfriends.

I have had some GF that enjoyed and encouraged anal and others that wouldn't put my pecker in their mouth. Going way back to high school, do I have to progress, seeing the provider three or four times to get to home base? And that does not get into the whole personality and personality disorder conundrum!!!

Another thing to tease and confuse us cavemen!!!

KISS (Keep it simple, sexy)...four questions is all, assuming we are all on board with CFS, which we should be...

1. Do I need a condom for your mouth?
2. Can I put it in your back hole?
3. How much?
4. What time?

Oh and for OPs new friend, 5. Does your husband plan to watch and how much of a discount do I get for that?

REMEMBER--KISS!!!

[EZ.]

Originally Posted by NTXReggie

With you OP...GFE is about as vague as, well, experience with past girlfriends.

I have had some GF that enjoyed and encouraged anal and others that wouldn't put my pecker in their mouth. Going way back to high school, do I have to progress, seeing the provider three or four times to get to home base? And that does not get into the whole personality and personality disorder conundrum!!!

Another thing to tease and confuse us cavemen!!!

KISS (Keep it simple, sexy)...four questions is all, assuming we are all on board with CFS, which we should be...

1. Do I need a condom for your mouth?
2. Can I put it in your back hole?
3. How much?
4. What time?

Oh and for OPs new friend, 5. Does your husband plan to watch and how much of a discount do I get for that?

REMEMBER--KISS!!!

What do they look like? What's on the menu? How much? Not rocket science.

You see a girl and you enjoy yourself. You repeat and she feels more comfortable with you. By the third time, she has opened up and you figure, this bitch is bat shit crazy.
Don't tell me about a husband. A friend went to a sex club. A guy asked him to fuck his wife so he could watch. During the act, they got out of rhythm and my friend slipped out. The husband reached between his legs and put it back in for him. That is so wrong on so many levels.

[Prolongus]

Originally Posted by OldLRRP

A friend went to a sex club. A guy asked him to fuck his wife so he could watch. During the act, they got out of rhythm and my friend slipped out. The husband reached between his legs and put it back in for him. That is so wrong on so many levels.

I've heard of a "helping hand" but good God...
The term "GFE" could mean anything these days...I think some girls use it on purpose just so they don't have to be specific about some of their Activities. If my past girlfriends BBBJCIMed me does that mean you will too if you're GFE? Nope...

[EZ.]

I'm too old and too conservative. I have never been to one of those places. I don't understand how it can be GFE and I'm not getting laid. The girl with the husband is now offering only CBJ. Have you ever had a girlfriend give you that? The only thing worse is the wife experience ...lock jaw.

[EZ.]

This ad just popped up:
30 minute / SPECIAL TODAY!!! Only!!!!! 200 any level

❤❤Get Down And Dirty !!!!!!FunCumYum.......I am 37 yrs old..5' 107, d's*Would like to be taken away for some sweet moments with you. .....

I want to take all the pleasure that you have to give me and get off mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmm

Then I want to give it all back and feel you cum!!!!
*1 HRL2, 225, L3- 3252 hours 425

do not do 30 minutes..

I'm doing well to make it an hour. 3253 hours is asking too much

[ElisabethWhispers]

Originally Posted by OldLRRP

This ad just popped up:
30 minute / SPECIAL TODAY!!! Only!!!!! 200 any level

❤❤Get Down And Dirty !!!!!!FunCumYum.......I am 37 yrs old..5' 107, d's*Would like to be taken away for some sweet moments with you. .....

I want to take all the pleasure that you have to give me and get off mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mmmmmmmmmm

Then I want to give it all back and feel you cum!!!!
*1 HRL2, 225, L3- 3252 hours 425

do not do 30 minutes..

I'm doing well to make it an hour. 3253 hours is asking too much

I'm not sure why you're so confused. You seem like an intelligent man. Also, in your signature line, you're very specific with your wants and desires.

So why can't you just keep things simple (stupid/sweet/silly)? I'm just playing Devil's Advocate here.

Half the time, I don't know what ladies are writing, either.

But if someone seems fetching to you, why don't you just ask them what their ad means? And if you're more on the basic side of what you want from an encounter, then after screening, you could just *cough* lay it on the table for them. So to speak.

Just a thought.

[EZ.]

Elisabeth, In the initial post, I was talking to a provider after the session. I was laughing because she didn't know what was in her "packages". As I said, I liked this girl and was only playing. So far, I've like them all. Trust me, how girls write their menus isn't a huge obstacle in my life. I know it could cost them business.

I didn't find this girls ad confusing just humorous. It could have used some editing.

Yes, I'm pretty easy to please. My wants are pretty straight forward and definitely nothing unusual there. When I can't figure out if they are included in the menu, it's a problem.

[pyramider]

If you do just a little research you will know what a menu is like ...