Want to go out with a bang

[Sir Lancehernot]

It's been four-and-a-half years since I saw anyone but her, five-and-a-half months of celibacy since she pretty much ghosted me. I had no idea that August 5 would be the last time I would ever have meaningful sex with anyone, and, frankly, I haven't had much desire to retest the hobby waters.


But I've been thinking a little about how that final meeting would have been different if I'd known it would be our last. I think I'd've liked to check off a few bucket-list items. The emotional connection will never be there again, but I can still put a check mark beside three or four things I'd like to try before calling it quits for good (CIM, COF, rimming, and roadhead).



And my upcoming birthday (April) would, I think, be a fine opportunity to make that happen. Between a nice bonus at the new job and the money I was setting aside to help with a down payment on a house for her that's now been reallocated, funding shouldn't be much of an object, even though it'll probably take several meetings across three or four days.


So, guys, if you were going to pick someone to be the last fuck of your life, someone who'd turn your head while wearing clothes and give you whiplash naked, someone who would convincingly pretend to like you while taking pleasure in bringing you pleasure and checking some or all of those boxes, who might that be? Bonus points if she gets me in the one-third-my-age club (she'd be 22 or younger).

[ntxguy]

Just buy a ring and marry her. Problem solved.

[mtabsw]

Pick a few you like on 411 - let them know I'll be interviewing them and collecting data on your wish list. I'll send you a report, and won't even charge you for the investigations and my time - you just need to pay the fees and let me handle the process.

nb - the candidates must 1) be older than my son (24); 2) weigh less than me; 4) Not Piss Me Off

[CKJAmore]

I would try Danica Stone whom you can contact through P411. That’s the name that comes to my mind. She might not check all the boxes in your bonus points list, but for me, she happens to be one of my favorites. She might just fit the bill. It’s worth a shot. She is absolutely the best looking provider that I have seen so far. So that’s one recommendation for what it’s worth.

[Frankyfish]

Mr. Lancehernot,
If you are suggesting that you may retire from this board may I suggest not to. I have enjoyed your wit and stories you have told over the years. About your comment on “the last time you had meaningful sex”. I don’t know if my story really has any relevance to you or not, but here it goes.
When I was divorced from my first wife of almost 13 years of shit and hell. I thought I would never want to have sex with some bitch again. Then I met my current wife. She rocked my vanilla ass with a vengeance. We were both in our early 30’s. My vanilla sex life before her was definitely boring when it’s compared. I discovered what having real relationship sex was all about. She was the Apple of my eye and as far as I was concerned absolutely the last person I would have sex with. Well almost 18 years go by and all is good, then everything started to change. Some of it is her hormones and I understand the challenges with that. No proof on my part but I believe there was another man for some quickie sex. What ever the combination was our sex life started to die, then it went dead dead!! In the year 2023 we had sex twice, once in January, which was amazing, and then in September, which was me on top while she laid there. I almost didn’t get a nut. So sex sucks now in my marriage. I must confess just like a lot of us mongers on this board that I came here after a lady at the old Bodywrx in FTW asked me to post a review for her. She was actually the second person I had sex with after marriage. I come here now so I can find out about others I can meet. See for me this board has saved my sanity and what’s left of my marriage. So before you guys start giving me hell about how fast I should dump her and move on let me say I still love my wife and don’t want to throw 29 years of marriage out the window.
So the rest of the story after that long introduction. I have now met another lady in the business that I find absolutely beautiful and amazing, not only the sex but just her. So my body count is a fucking lot, well over 300. I know I went fucking ballistic but I had a lot of anger that I had to fuck out of me, LOL, I mean a lot!! All along wanting things to be better at home. So now I have met this amazing lady that is no where near the other 300+. I feel lucky as hell that we met. We have been seeing each other for a little while now. The feelings are so real I look on the mirror and go what the fuck is wrong with me. So I guess what I’m saying Lance is that there is still hope to find that meaningful relationship whether it’s her in HO land or real life. It may take banging through eternity to get there though. So keep your head up, both of them, and keep positive because it can happen again. PEACE

[bobbyb1234]

Frankyfish,

Your post reminded me of "A Letter from a Sex Worker to a Wife About Her Cheating Husband"

https://www.vice.com/en/article/nnqg...eating-husband

Quote""
Let me ask you: When was the last time you had sex three times in a week? When was the last time he complained about that? Don't you think that maybe it's possible that he's instead taken the problem out of your hands, which is to say into mine?

The good news is that if your husband is seeing me, it's because he wants to stay married. He is choosing to get some ersatz affection in the least messy way possible. Imagine if instead of me it was the babysitter, your neighbor, your best friend. I could go on, list, but you get the idea.

I'm a professional. I am discreet, but more than that I am discrete: My time, attention, and sexuality are measured in hours, beyond which he is yours. And importantly, I don't love your husband and never will. It's quite unlikely that I feel more than favorite-barista level affection for him.
""

We all have different reasons for being in this hobby.

[TinMan]

“Favorite-barista level affection”.

I like that.

[DirtyDog2022]

Lola Brea if she is still around.

[TinMan]

She still has active accounts under that name, so yes she is still around.

She has a p411 account, but I don’t believe it’s public any longer. Members can still find her though if they login and search under her name.

[ggolfus]

Not the same after the ring....ha ha

[TexTushHog]

“Meaningful sex”??!! Is there any other kind?

[BossyWillson]

Originally Posted by Sir Lancehernot

It's been four-and-a-half years since I saw anyone but her, five-and-a-half months of celibacy since she pretty much ghosted me. I had no idea that August 5 would be the last time I would ever have meaningful sex with anyone, and, frankly, I haven't had much desire to retest .

first you need to give up the ghost

[TinMan]

The hobby is Hotel California. You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave.

[bennie]

Quit while you’re not ahead

[Sir Lancehernot]

Thanks, all, for the advice.