Recent events in paper

[Ms.Lady Y]

With what has recently been in the paper and on the news about a lady I was wondering what you would do if you walked in a house and seen the lady had a baby in the house and illegal stuff laying around.
Would you make a anonymous call and report it?
Would you go ahead a see her and let the little head take control?
Would you walk out?

If it was me because i am very active in recovery I would call friends in recovery and try to help her, take her to detox, get her in treatment and find a safe place for the kid with family or someone else safe.

[farmstud60]

I would first walk out, and after seeing your post, probably let you know so you could send someone from recovery in to handle the situation. The legal system doesn't seem to be able to help these people out, and they do need help. Of course, if they don't realize they need the help and want to change, it is pretty tough to help them.

[LNK]

Originally Posted by farmstud60

I would first walk out, and after seeing your post, probably let you know so you could send someone from recovery in to handle the situation. The legal system doesn't seem to be able to help these people out, and they do need help. Of course, if they don't realize they need the help and want to change, it is pretty tough to help them.

Pretty much the same, but the last sentence is the big one.

You cannot force someone to change against their will. If they don't want to, all the treatment and 12 step programs in the world won't do it.

If I knew that children were being neglected/abused, definitely I would call. Child Abuse/Neglect Hotline 1-800-652-1999.

[Ms.Lady Y]

The problem with calling cps is a lot of times they do more damage then good. Believe me I have seen a lot of children get more abused in foster care than staying with the bad parent. If I were to call cps I would first fine a safe family member then they will let the kid stay with them.

[LNK]

Sadly, while that's true, you have to do something. Finding a family member is often the worst thing that you can do, as they will allow the parent access to the children to continue the abuse/neglect.

Chance that the child that you've seen abused/neglected is being abused/neglected where they are now: 100%

Chance that they will be in a better place if CPS intervenes: < 100%, but not zero.

[PFCffff]

Originally Posted by Ms.Lady Y

The problem with calling cps is a lot of times they do more damage then good. Believe me I have seen a lot of children get more abused in foster care than staying with the bad parent..

Agreed. There is no situation so bad that it can't be made worse by calling the cops.

Y, you would be one of the first people I would call for advice in a situation like this. I know you care about people.

[Ms.Lady Y]

Thank you guys for trusting in me.
I have been in recovery a long time and seen a lot of women have cps step in. The women that cps stepped in 80% of the time lost their kids forever, they do everything in their power to keep the kids gone for good, not help them.
The girls that family or friends took their kids worked harder on getting them back, family/friends helped them to change their life and 70% of them are clean and sober and good parents.

[jaja133]

Thanks BIGG HUGG to you.

[Guest062514]

I have seen girls "fall off the wagon" several times, and like Lady Y says, when CPS intervenes, very very few "do" the right things to get their kids back (rather that is CPS, or the gals not "doing the right things"). They want to, and might be able to get them back for a short while. I have seen several that did get their kid(s) back, but only to fall back in to the same "habit" that got their kids taken away. I often think at times I am only enabling them to continue down the bad road. Yes several of the gals and I have talked about it lots. It is very tough for them and for us guys.

The other big thing is that you can only "help" people that want help. Until they realize that they have to want to make the change, and commit to it, the change is not going to happen.