Fair is fair: Make it right

[spanky06]

Originally Posted by Kandy Kelly

And that weekend was my childs birthday I think that comes before this hobby

You never have to defend spending time with family...anyone who gets mad at you for that has issues. I think the issue lies in the communication, you are all about making relationships so the need for great communication is essential to succeed. You learned from mistake and just need to look forward

[legman+]

Since this will be my last thread on this forum, I might as well go for it. I'll be damned if this ends up like Rktman and Ivy.

THAT'S the Kelly I came to know and love as we all do who have gotten to know her. The one in the tattered brown dress with skinny legs and big feet as I remember her on her birthday. Honest and deeper in her thoughts than I would have expected and worthy of more than the cheap chump change she was being offered at first.

And yes maybe I haven't been patient at times, maybe I let things cloud events, and I dadgum sure write long emails. And for a fact I know that at my age I still need to learn to love as a human being.

What I wanted her to see if she visited again is all she had brought out in me: the interior decorating, the bedroom suite, using my money wisely to buy groceries, taking a little wine with my meals all because she made me want to be a better man because of the spark she lit in me.

And I want her to become a better woman 'cause with what she's gone through I WILL NEVER EVER BELIEVE she does not have a better purpose for her life. The world needs her sweetness and she needs to know she's a one of a kind gem without equal in my eyes. I'm just an old dumbass, Silly Putty guy.

So I say again to the mods, close this thread. I got what I wanted. There are a couple of other faves I did she forgot (the Austin trip) but okay. She stepped up to the plate as the lady I know she is. I'll have to clean up the guts she ripped out awhile ago, but that's okay. She's worth it.

[trynagetlaid]

Originally Posted by Kandy Kelly

And that weekend was my childs birthday I think that comes before this hobby

Of course it does, and if you had communicated that to him, I'm pretty sure he would have understood. Maybe even sent along a small gift.

[legman+]

That was all that was missing here: just a word or two would have made all the difference. It wasn't about getting off: it was simple courtesy of a note or reply.

[pmdelites]

and so the world turns likes sand in a hour glass through the days of our lives....


seriously, ...

legman and kandy, i send positive energy to both of you and wish for you better days and nites and months and years ahead of you, whether in a "relationship" or completely apart from each other.


i have waited to see where this thing went before commenting. here are my thoughts.

communication is key in ANY relationship.
absence of communication can lead to patience or to misunderstandings.
or to no le hace ["it doesnt matter" in spanish].

add in the ability to see a situation for what it REALLY is and not what you want it to be or what you wish it were or what you wish it could be... and the relationship can grow.

take most of that away and you only have interactions based on partial information.
which can lead to frustrations, anger, or even hatred.

if you [the generic you, not any specific person you] want a relationship, you have to work at it, be clear and open, be understanding, be supportive, be there when you need to and when you dont, and just be. not changing the other person, just be and be accepting [that's not to say you accept everything and will live with it, just that you accept that is who they are].

hopefully, many have identified and will apply the lessons that are in this interaction between kandy and legman, as well as in other interactions we've read about over the years.

and if you cant see or dont apply these lessons, dont come crying to us when it happens to you and expect that no one will say "didnt you learn anything from that episode and all the others that have gone before us??"

peace be with you all!!!

[pmdelites]

Originally Posted by legman+

That was all that was missing here: just a word or two would have made all the difference. It wasn't about getting off: it was simple courtesy of a note or reply.

maybe it would, maybe it wouldnt.
and unless you two explicitly stated what you expected, wanted, hoped for, desired, and didnt want [which is hard to do in any relationship], dont go expecting that it will happen. "s/he should know what i want" is not a very good way to have a relationship. [see one of the man rules posted earlier this week.]

[Guest021812-3]

If I was a "provider advisor" and saw a guy posting that "I fell in love with the woman she is" kind of bullshit, I'd tell the provider to either:

A) run as fast as you can and don't look back
OR
B) take him for all he's worth

depending on whether or not she had a conscience.

Let me tell you goofs something. If you think you know somebody deep down that you're fucking for money; you don't. If you think you "get" them; you don't. If you think it's anything past a friendly business exchange; it isn't.

It doesn't make these women cold, or heartless, or bad people. It's just survival, and it's not their fault you were stupid or sad enough to fall for a hooker.

Not only that, but it's fucking scary. I get terrified when some crazy civvie I fuck well a few times drops the L word. Just imagine what some 100 lb. girl feel when a dude she fucks to pay the bills and posts on her advertising bulletin board turns into a psycho.

Not saying she should have stolen his money, but for fucks sake, get a grip on what this is here.

[gashpump]

He loves her bod, and it seems she has similar feelings toward his wallet. Since this is the basis for many male/female relationships nowadays, I think the only solution that will resolve this little spat is a nice big wedding.

[guest061212-1]

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Legman, you are an idiot. It is just sex. Not a relationship.

Kandy, you should live within your means and quit borrowing money.


How many ladies would lend us a piece of ass on credit? ........ I didn't think so.

Until they start loaning us a piece of pussy regularly, quit loaning them money and being blinded by your own loneliness.

[Luv_da_girls]

Originally Posted by trynagetlaid

Aesop would be proud of you Kandy. You killed the goose that laid the golden eggs.

Gus wants to get off what, once a week? Every two weeks? Whatever. Just figure out a frequency and stick to it. Even surprise him with a bonus nut once or twice a month.

It's not rocket science sweetie. Just find a few more guys like Gus and you will survive the slow times. Keep being flaky and full of drama, and unreliable, you won't.

Post of the year right there.

[SouthArlington]

From this thread I've learned this Kandy is hot. Her showcase pics make my pants go crazy.

[L.A.]

My opinion (and I know you've all been waiting for it) it is that the relationship here has for quite some time gone above and beyond the "normal" provider/client relationship. Many of the rules of time and rates and money are blurred due to this relationship. I really think both of you have had your say regarding a private matter in a public forum and if anything else needs to be said it should be between only the two of you privately. Hopefully you two can work this out...sounds like you really liked each other.

[Guest071613-2]

Originally Posted by spanky06

I am on Kelly's side in this...she had gone above and beyond what had been expected in numerous cases, I would think that enough equity would have been built up that Legman could have waited an extended time period before calling her out. Sometimes things happen and a persons first instinct is not to check their PM right away.

I have loaned people money before knowing full well that I would never see that money again in my life. Sometimes it is better to help someone out in need than to satisfy your own wants and desires.

Really? He waited three fucking weeks to post this. You are saying he was hasty? Bullshit.

So why don't you be the sexual philanthropist and loan her some cash?

Kelly, yeah, you fucked up. You know you were using him. All it would have taken was some communication on your part, but somehow you weren't able to, until this was posted. It's always a kid's birthday or some family tragedy with *some* providers, but when YOU needed HIM, he sure was there for YOU, right? You have some chutzpah, I give you that!

And for everyone getting on his case, he didn't come on here and slam her. He didn't post a bunch of mudslinging-type shit. In fact, he seemed to be sad to have to post this. The fact that some of you are giving him grief for doing the right thing is beyond me. Well.....no it's not. Pussy is a hell of a drug.

And what are you doing, Kelly, (or not doing) that you charge hundreds of dollars an hour, yet you need to beg and borrow money from hobbyists? It's really not that slow. Do you need some help with budgeting or learning how to take care of your money? There are lots of resources here... Just saying.

Parting words of advice: If their mouth works enough to ask for it, then it's in good enough shape to make a down payment on that loan......

[guest032413]

True i was not making my communication with him a top priority and neither was i making ecciw. I was not even posting. If i were to be out to use a man i would have not given him suge large discout with so much time before i asked for any money down the road which might not have even been asked for if not truly needed.

[guest032413]

Eww sorry that was sloppy just took advil pm