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offshoredrilling · 01-04-2011, 11:15 AM

If you can't take the heat (Whitey Brown Inc)

"get out the kitchen, can't stand to hear anymore of your bitchin'...... "

aw!!!! stop the whining

offshoredrilling · 01-16-2011, 08:51 AM

Three cheers to the most important hobby tool I own. Much more important than a cell phone or web boards like this. Works well with the cell phone (I need to get moon dial app for mine), But I all ready got the grand father clock before the cell phone was even in the picture. Not easy to work with a web site sex board. But with care can be done.
To my grand father clock, thanks for saving me more than once

and severing me well over many years "February 1982"

If you do not understand my relation with my clock, you may be hopeless.

disclaimer: may have hard time with 40 and above!!!!!!!! nooooooooo

Edit: worthy of its own thread(in coed), but I had to put something here. And here is a weeee bit safer here.

edit II: let me know I was in danger three months in a row now. Last time 01/15/2011. But ATF is still my ATF, thanks clock

Laker · 01-17-2011, 08:12 AM

Nice Clock!

cnym · 01-17-2011, 02:00 PM

A businessman met a beautiful Lady and agreed to spend the night with her for $500. They did their thing, and, before he left, he told her that he did not have any cash with him, but he would have his secretary write a check and mail it to her, calling the payment 'RENT FOR APARTMENT.'

On the way to the office, he regretted what he had done, realizing that the whole event had not been worth the price!!!!!
So he had his secretary send a check for $250 and enclose the following typed note:

Dear Madam:
Enclosed find a check for $250 for rent of your apartment . I am not sending the amount agreed upon, because when I rented the place, I was under the impression that:
#1 - it had never been occupied;
#2 - there was plenty of heat; and
#3 - it was small enough to make me feel cozy and at home.

However, I found out that:
#1 - it had been previously occupied,
#2 - there wasn't any heat, and
#3 - it was entirely too large.'

Upon receipt of the note, the Lady immediately returned the check for $250 with the following note:

Dear Sir:
#1 - I cannot understand how you could expect a beautiful apartment to remain unoccupied indefinitely.
#2 - As for the heat, there is plenty of it, if you know how to turn it on.
#3 - Regarding the space, the apartment is indeed of regular size, but if you don't have enough furniture to fill it, please do not blame the management.

So, Please send the rent in full or we will be forced to contact your present Landlady...

offshoredrilling · 01-23-2011, 02:41 PM

was going to post in another thread. Changed my mind. But was to good not to post somewhere.

NormalBob · 01-23-2011, 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by offshoredrilling

I was talking to a stripper at the Mirage a few weeks ago (December?!?!). She brought a catalog over and was looking for outfits. Since she asked my opinion, I picked that pair of shoes because I said you could put all kinds of different things in it to change the shoe look. I think the pair in her catalog had a string of pearls though and not a tarantula.

offshoredrilling · 01-23-2011, 03:30 PM

I think condoms in one, toy in the other would make a cool statement.

offshoredrilling · 02-04-2011, 06:12 PM

I off to see the wizard. to find some more strange meals.
How are women just like chips

you can not just eat one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

offshoredrilling · 02-07-2011, 10:31 AM

new avatar is temporary

cnym · 02-09-2011, 07:05 PM

The IRS has announced that they will give a free pencil sharpener to all taxpayers who pay their taxes on time this year.

It can be placed on your desk as a constant reminder of the service they provide to you each year.

offshoredrilling · 02-10-2011, 01:45 AM

Hay I have that feeling right now. Its come from ___ ____.

Laker · 02-10-2011, 08:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cnym

The IRS has announced that they will give a free pencil sharpener to all taxpayers who pay their taxes on time this year.

It can be placed on your desk as a constant reminder of the service they provide to you each year.

Made in Greece!

offshoredrilling · 02-10-2011, 08:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Laker

Made in Greece!

The country, or the town of

Laker · 02-10-2011, 08:50 AM

Was thinking the country! ;-)

offshoredrilling · 02-10-2011, 08:59 AM

I live in the town of. And as of late, well I was wondering!!!!!!!!!!lets see if the town of can keep out of the news this year.