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Valerie · 03-13-2013, 04:45 AM

To think that anyone who would be a partner to a provider is automatically a loser or a pimp is just ridiculous, and ignorant...

There's a big world out there, filled with all sorts of people (imagine that!)...Not everyone shares the same narrow-minded views as the people in the state of Texas

If you think there are zero providers in the world with functional/happy relationships, then you are delusional.

LexusLover · 03-13-2013, 05:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Valerie

..Not everyone shares the same narrow-minded views as the people in the state of Texas

That's correct. There are some who have even narrower minds.

SexyCassandra · 03-13-2013, 05:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Valerie

I must say I am a bit taken back at the amount of people on this board who seem to think real & functional relationships do not exist for those of us in this industry. Not quite sure if it's a narrow minded thing or what, but I can assure you that there are plenty of ladies out there with partners who know exactly what they do, are okay with it, and are not pimps. Perhaps not so much in Texas? Most of my girlfriends who are escorts are married or in relationships.

I don't exactly know what there is to explain, I mean, my relationship is probably no different than most. My partner knows what I do, it does not bother him for he knows it is simply work. He and I share the same mentality when it comes to sex, he knows I separate my work from my personal life, which is probably one reason there are no jealousy issues. He is not insecure, at all, he trusts me and I him, and he respects the hell out of me. If I had a funny/weird experience at "work" and I want to share it with him, it doesn't bother him, he will just laugh with me. He is not with me for "the money", as we have separate bank accounts, (though I do hijack his credit card sometimes

), and he is most certainly not a 'loser'. He is a proper professional with a great job and makes great money alone, so he doesn't need mine. We both have similar interests, both love to travel, (and both have to travel for our jobs), we cook together, watch telly, play xbox, have great sex, raise kids...all the things that 'normal' couples do. He is my lover and my best friend, and I could not ask for a better partner, honestly.

So "managing my unique" relationship, as Sarunga put it, is not difficult at all.

The key to a functional relationship in this hobby IMO is finding a partner who is open-minded, and doesn't focus on who you are "at work", but rather focus on building something meaningful between the pair of you. Be who you need to be at work, and when you are with your S/O, just be you...

Hope that helps?

Could be just the US men, culture differences?????
This biz has kinda damaged how I view relationships over all. What you described your relationship to be sounds like what all women hope to have or fantasize about.
Thanks for sharing it gave me a lil hope....
Maybe I wont die an old lady with 10 cats after all.....

Valerie · 03-13-2013, 05:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SexyCassandra

Could be just the US men, culture differences?????
This biz has kinda damaged how I view relationships over all. What you described your relationship to be sounds like what all women hope to have or fantasize about.
Thanks for sharing give me a lil hope....
Maybe I wont die an old lady with 10 cats after all.....

Perhaps, but I've dated men in the US as well who were fine with it, the reasons those relationships ended were for other reasons not related to my profession....I understand how the biz can damage a person, I've totally been there myself, just try not to become too jaded and don't believe all the pimp/loser bollox, besides, no one wants to become the dodgy cat lady

friendlytxguy · 03-13-2013, 08:10 AM

Sensual, this is a very interesting and well written thought provoking post/question. Although I don't agree with my esteemed colleague Trey, I do agree that it is difficult for both sides. I've had the pleasure and pain of having a friendship and relationship with a provider. I must say that overall I am better for it. She was and is still a wonderful person. What made it special, is that she "was' honest with me about everything. At the end of the day, to discover if you can have a good friendship and then maybe relationship completely hinges on communication and honesty.

With that said, most men cannot or will not ever understand the choices and tough decisions women make to take care of themselves and the ones they love. You can easily tell one's level of intelligence, understanding, and who they are by reading responses on this board. I don't judge anyone's opinions or choices because iv'e made as many or more mistakes than most people here. But in closing, my advice is to be who you are girl, be honest. I always told my girl what was important to me, always. It was up to her to decide if it was something she wanted. Good luck.

oilfieldscum · 03-13-2013, 09:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Valerie

To think that anyone who would be a partner to a provider is automatically a loser or a pimp is just ridiculous, and ignorant...

There's a big world out there, filled with all sorts of people (imagine that!)...Not everyone shares the same narrow-minded views as the people in the state of Texas

If you think there are zero providers in the world with functional/happy relationships, then you are delusional.

So now you're hating on every person in Texas?

Are you channeling brooke or something?

LexusLover · 03-13-2013, 09:41 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by oilfieldscum

So now you're hating on every person in Texas?

I gave her the benefit of a doubt by "assuming" that she was excluding those born in Texas from her ridiculing comment, and was speaking of those who burden those of us who were born here with their presence, even if for a limited period of time. Otherwise there are options:

Guest081318 · 03-13-2013, 09:43 AM

Sensual- If you want a real relationship and some to care about or love then be 100% honest about what you do. Just remember who you are honest with because it could come back and bite you in the butt if you piss off the wrong person. Alot of relationships/marriages don't work out because of honestly issues or not having uncondition love. Now days alot of people do not know what uncondition love really is. They think if your perfect I will love you. If you do this I will love you. Uncondition love means I will love you no matter what you do. You would be suprised by what alot of people are ok with as long as it is discussed and agreed upon. Also just remember because of your job you can not be a hiprocate so if he goes and fucks someone else you can't be mad either. Just remember who you asking, half the people on here are not honest about what they do and when their relationship fails they wonder why.... As a few of the other people have said, find someone who is understanding & open minded.

LexusLover · 03-13-2013, 09:48 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AddisonGFE

Just remember who you asking, half the people on here are not honest about what they do ....

"half"?

This board is supposed to be about anonymity and fantasy, so it should be 100%.

jbravo_123 · 03-13-2013, 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SexyCassandra

Could be just the US men, culture differences?????
This biz has kinda damaged how I view relationships over all. What you described your relationship to be sounds like what all women hope to have or fantasize about.
Thanks for sharing it gave me a lil hope....
Maybe I wont die an old lady with 10 cats after all.....

Likely more of a Southerner thing although in the US we're pretty prude about sex in general (but we love our violence, damnit!).

Yeah sadly, I can really see how the hobby can really influence one's views on relationships both as a provider and hobbyist.

PS: Psh, 10 cats is nothing!

Also:

LexusLover · 03-13-2013, 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jbravo_123

Likely more of a Southerner thing although in the US we're pretty prude about sex in general (but we love our violence, damnit!).

It's all relative:

jbravo_123 · 03-13-2013, 01:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LexusLover

It's all relative:

Fair enough. Let's say compared to other countries in the West / first world countries then.

Beau Derierre · 03-13-2013, 02:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Valerie

Perhaps, but I've dated men in the US as well who were fine with it, the reasons those relationships ended were for other reasons not related to my profession....I understand how the biz can damage a person, I've totally been there myself, just try not to become too jaded and don't believe all the pimp/loser bollox, besides, no one wants to become the dodgy cat lady

I'm a bit confused! Aren't you married to wakeup? Trying to understand this board is impossible!

LexusLover · 03-13-2013, 05:11 PM

I don't think this thread is about "sex" ...

........... it's about acceptance, tolerance, and commitment.

Trey · 03-13-2013, 05:18 PM

I'm sorry Val I did not know we had so many ladies here in great relationships who's partners know they suck dick for cash. I've seen plenty of guys come on here and say they are married to a provider but they always say she stopped providing services when they got together. That is hard enough to date a former provider, but to date a girl that currently sucks dick for cash... I'm gonna stick with my loser or pimp idea. Maybe in England it's ok for your wife to be a whore, but here in the Great State of Texas we don't play that shit. Unless you're a pimp or maybe a loser.