What if you fall in love

[Will Boner]

Originally Posted by Lana Storm

I would say go read discussions by GUC and "R" but we are unable to do so..... that will make you back away from falling in love with a provider !

Lana.....I had forgot about that, but you are so correct. What a total freakin' disaster that was..........for everyone!

[hwygnome]

daddyo67 "I think that the successfull relationships that develop in this world quietly disappear and are not here now to post to this thread. "

Some do decide to fade away. There a small number couples that have made it to date that were on aspd and I at this particular moment assume they are also here. And for the most part they don't chime in on threads like this.


I would say that a relationship getting started in this world and lasting at least 5 years has slightly smaller odds of making it than one started outside. The factor that makes the odds worse is this world. The extra stress of being truthful and wondering if they are being truthful among them.

When your in love or lust the object of your desire can do no wrong. However when it starts to wear off you begin to hate things that did not bug you before. Love and hate are very powerful alone but so much worse when you swing from love to the far side of hate.

Being in this world just means there can be so much more extra ammo to use when you suddenly hate that person you thought you loved and would die for just a few weeks before. Or have it used against you. We have seen many blowups over the years where this has happened. Lana refers to probably the most remembered knock down drag out public fight.

[AllStarShortstop]

Originally Posted by Lana Storm

I would say go read discussions by GUC and "R" but we are unable to do so..... that will make you back away from falling in love with a provider !

what a total disaster that was...but i guarantee what made that situation blow up to the proportion that it did was prolly the fact that both individuals had a very strong mutual attraction for each other...but they were also the same type of person...strong willed and stubborn...relationships like that can/do blow up in the "real world" also...but when times are good...times are VERY good...my guess is if they had met as "civilians" then it would've ended the same way...

as for the thread topic...i seem to recall a quote from a long time ago but can't remember who said it...my bet it was 32flavors but not real sure...

"the hobby is not a dating pool"

but i've also been around long enough to know that love sometimes springs up in the strangest places...at the wackiest times...between people that you'd never expect...so why the hell not here as long as one doesn't come here looking for it...

my 10 cents...my 2 cents is free...

allstar

[QueenSophie]

Originally Posted by LovingKAYLA

RUN THE F#CK AWAY. Let me tell you about my little experience someday.

Doesnt everyone at sometime in their life have a "let me tell you about MY...."?? What works for some, doesnt for others. More power to those that it does.

Originally Posted by Angelsshadow

Just be cautious, these lovely ladies provide a service, its their job to make you feel wanted

Nevermind...

[Guest101610-2]

Originally Posted by Chevalier

Really?? I respect (very much) several of the ladies I've seen. A few I know well enough to trust as much as most civilian friends. Any relationship beyond P4P is not feasible, but that's because of other circumstances rather than because they're not "worthy."

Agreed. Because of what happened, I got into therapy to try and find a way to keep that from happening to myself again (maybe I did something wrong.) What I learned about myself is that I had never learned to compartmentalize my life, work, etc. If I make a friend in the hobby (a real friend) That friend must choose between being apart of my real life and never going BCD, or staying hobby friends and I will still see him BCD. The separation of the two has saved me mentally. Learning about boundries was wonderful, especially here.

I've also found (for myself alone) I will never take a mate or have a boyfriend while I am still in the hobby. I am not capable of both. It wouldn't be fair to the boyfriend because I throw everything I am into my work and when I get home I don't want to do anything with anyone else.

You guys are going to love this but the evil woman in my story is the exact same woman several in this thread were screwed by. Some of these women make it a career. Once a guy falls for a girl and she fucks him to his hearts content, she OWNS his wallet. This woman had like 6 or 7 on the line at once. Never trust a provider for nothing. She must earn that trust over time. If anything is ever meant to be, it will happen over time. So relax. Treat it as the wonderful fantasy it is... and have AWESOME sex along the road.

BTW, I recommend all providers get therapy at least once a month. It really does help and you learn things that will fascinate you.

[JohnBoyjrh]

There is an advantage to being a "geezer" and seeing these young women BCD. I know that they would never see me if it weren't for the $$$s . That removes "love" from the equation. I do and have loved some past and presant providers, but have nor never will "fall in love" with one , knowing that without the $$$s there would not be the connection. I'm just glad to be here. LOL

[notdeadyet]

Perhaps, falling in love with a provider (and vice versa) is like a third or fourth marriage: the triumph of hope over experience.

[GRIPITRIPIT]

I know that love can happen to anyone at anytime,we are all human.

Recipe for destrution

1.mix a half gallon of love,this gets the concoction started like a good cajun rue
2.half gallon of lust,easy ingredient to find at any local Ho-board..
3.throw in some alcohol, and drugs,,heat it up first
4 top that off with bi-polar problems,grind up some other mental disorders and add chilled.
5 add distrust and jealousy,from being in the hobby
6.shake it up with some bad past history, ie..abuse,rape,abortion, and unwanted preganancy, and a long history in the sex industry such as a,provider, stripper, a little amatuer porn.
7. add some spice as desired like; guilt,self loathing,laziness,SO NOW YOU HAVE IT..good job

Now drink it all down in one sitting,when your finished you should feel empty, confused, sexually frustrated and wondering if you are capable of ever trusting or loving anybody or anything again..Its real funny, but it taste great at first, and quickly becomes horrible, causing a numb and sickening feeling in your gut.. After lots of therapy,rehab,depression, and a mountain of money you will be fine (MAYBE) and ready to report back to eccie and try another recipe.. Its fun and easy too ,,oh yea;;; BON APPITIT-TIT..

ps where is the freakin spell check on this board

[warlock]

"Never trust a provider for nothing. She must earn that trust over time. If anything is ever meant to be, it will happen over time. So relax."

Kayla, truer words were never written. After better than five years, I had a provider who I trusted and cared for, turn around and 'stab me in the back'. I never saw it coming, though I probably should have, things were simply "going too well." Worst thing of all was the total betrayal on her part.

[guest041110]

Originally Posted by LovingKAYLA

Agreed. Because of what happened, I got into therapy to try and find a way to keep that from happening to myself again (maybe I did something wrong.) What I learned about myself is that I had never learned to compartmentalize my life, work, etc. If I make a friend in the hobby (a real friend) That friend must choose between being apart of my real life and never going BCD, or staying hobby friends and I will still see him BCD. The separation of the two has saved me mentally. Learning about boundries was wonderful, especially here.

I've also found (for myself alone) I will never take a mate or have a boyfriend while I am still in the hobby. I am not capable of both. It wouldn't be fair to the boyfriend because I throw everything I am into my work and when I get home I don't want to do anything with anyone else.

You guys are going to love this but the evil woman in my story is the exact same woman several in this thread were screwed by. Some of these women make it a career. Once a guy falls for a girl and she fucks him to his hearts content, she OWNS his wallet. This woman had like 6 or 7 on the line at once. Never trust a provider for nothing. She must earn that trust over time. If anything is ever meant to be, it will happen over time. So relax. Treat it as the wonderful fantasy it is... and have AWESOME sex along the road.

BTW, I recommend all providers get therapy at least once a month. It really does help and you learn things that will fascinate you.

Compartmentalization can be a very bad thing depending on how extreme you become. I know because I used to do it when I was married and hobbying. However, I made a choice a couple of years ago to stop seeing escorts, which was shortly after I got divorced, even though I have fallen off the wagon from time to time.

What I found is I would rather have a friend whom I can connect with and learn about beyond the P4P world rather than just a romp in the sheets. Boundaries, like you wrote about Kayla, are paramount and due to the boundaries I have, I will not be here when I have someone in my life who wants me and who shows me that to be true. For me, now, it is very much like what you wrote, in as much it is either all or nothing with no in-between and I like it like that. Either you are a plaything in the BCD world (when I was active) or you are part of my real world with no P4P involvement.

Now if things progress in the real world, who knows as I might very well end up BCD with whomever decides she wants to be with me but that is in the real world, not P4P. I left this realm because I made a choice a couple of years ago to live a certain way that is incompatible with this lifestyle. I only visit from time to time because I have issues… a lot of issues.

PS: About trust… you are right. It is something that has to be earned over a period of time with each person having to prove their integrity since once its lost, trust is almost impossible to recover.

[Guest030911]

Originally Posted by LatexLover

Amen brother! Pussy will make you do some dumb shit too!

+1


I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

[OtrTim]

lol cpi

[1thatgotaway]

Originally Posted by cpi3000

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

Ok, now that is funny! (and true) Good thing I'm not only a good stalker, but I'm also a pretty good stocker


anyway.. If you do fall in love.. be honest, and not just with her be honest with yourself.

Kiss her softly, hold her close, and treasure every moment.

life is short

[guest041110]

Originally Posted by cpi3000

...
I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

*Chuckle*


And life is way too short, so run naked and scare 'em all!

[lovelybritney]

This has been the first time in many years I have been single.
I'm having lot's of fun!!!
Can't imagine falling in love right now.