A polite reminder to the guys of things that should be perfectly obvious

[KatieKatie]

I don't think shaving/trimming your bollocks is necessary. If you are doing this behind a partners/spouses back what would she think if one day you randomly decided to shave your junk?

[BDD]

KKNYC makes a good point. Start up and shaving it one day for no reason would be more telling than adding a new apartment key to your keyring.

I do wonder how common it is for guys to manscape these days. As a teenager a GF used to enjoy brushing my mane down below. In my early 20's it had to be shaved for an operation. Been keeping it clean / bare to very short every since. Most ladies I hang out with say they prefer it the way I keep it.

I still don't understand how one cleans up the arsehole area though.

[wynter_ice]

Originally Posted by Valerie

(Well my version of polite & all in good fun of course)

So having just read the other thread for the ladies, I thought I'd make one for all you cheeky bastards

1. Sort your breath out- Gum, mouth rinse, tic tac, I don't care how you do it, but don't come round trying to give us a kiss if you breath smells like something died in it. ( That big fuck off bottle of Listerine in the bathroom isn't there for decoration, use it!)

2. Take a shower- Unless you've just stepped out of the shower right before your booking, take a fucking shower when you arrive. No one wants to smell your sweaty ass, showers don't take long so just do it. I'm not minging, nor should you be.

3. Don't use all my towels- This is one of my personal pet peeves, don't use 4-5 wash cloths/towels please. A towel for after you've showered, fine. A towel to wipe your hands after you've washed them, fine, but don't take the piss. There should be no reason why 4-5 of my towels should be wasted on one person unless you're just a fucking idiot.

4. Don't bang on the door loudly- Discretion is important, so when you arrive at the hotel, there is no need to knock like you're a copper who's coming to get me. A gentle tap will suffice.

5. Cut your fucking fingernails- If you're a fan of finger banging, you better keep those bad boys trimmed all the way down, otherwise don't even think about putting them anywhere near my cunt.

6. Shave/trim your bollocks!- (This really only pertains to those who enjoy being rimmed or having their balls licked) If you think I'm going to go anywhere near that area with my tongue when you look like a fucking gorilla down there, then you're having a laugh.

7. Don't take shit at my incall- If you do, fuck you, you're fired.

8. Don't ask how many others I've seen- It's none of your business. When you arrive at my incall you will not see any indicators that others were there before you, so don't bother asking unless you just fancy getting yelled at.

9. Don't ask me for specific details of where about my incall is- I will make sure you have all the info you need in an appropriate time frame before our date, so don't even think about asking me what hotel I'm going to be staying at a week before.

10. Personal details- If I don't choose to share info about my personal life with you, then don't ask me a bunch of detailed questions about it, it's not your business.

If I think of more I'll be sure to add them

ALL I WANT TO SAY TO MEN IS SHAVE THAT HAIR HOLDS ORDER AND NASTY FUNK I DONT WANNA THROW UP ON U BUT PROB WILL IF U HAVE MORE HAIR ON UR JUNK THEN I DO MY HEAD.....RAZORS WORK WELL ESP IF U LIKE BJ...............DUH!!!!!

[Maliyah_Green]

heres one... asking for exchanges instead of cash.... or lowballing beyond a reason. "do you take food stamps or can i trade you for an iphone2" smh

[DarthMaul]

Originally Posted by Maliyah_Green

heres one... asking for exchanges instead of cash.... or lowballing beyond a reason. "do you take food stamps or can i trade you for an iphone2" smh

HaaaHaaa! DAMN! I am definitely going to reply to get under that booty!

[Sexy_Rissa]

Ha! Or how about agreeing to one thing and then they, all in the heat of the moment, decide to do some extra stuff!! If you didn't pay me for Greek at the door the your little Willie should not be pushing his little head thru my back door! IJS

[tk3g0d]

Originally Posted by BDD

...How in the fuck does a guy contort himself into a position to shave his arsehole? I have no idea how to make that happen...

Recently helped one of my favorites shave what little peach fuzz she had around her starfish. Was totally a bunch of fun, but really hard to stay focused

[sexydream]

This is so true, I've been a witness to all things said. Very well said dear, I've couldn't have said it better myself.

[Randall Creed]

What if I have to suddenly take this MONSTER dump when I'm like, a minute from your incall?

Do you have any idea how much it sucks trying to hold in a huge deposit of stomach rumbling, bubbly, cornhole burning, ass geyser waste while trying to enjoy yourself sexually? You never know when the urge will strike, and sometimes it's too late to stop at a store. Sometimes a store with a restroom isn't an option.

If I do a courtesy flush is that cool?

[Valerie]

Originally Posted by Rambro Creed

What if I have to suddenly take this MONSTER dump when I'm like, a minute from your incall?

Do you have any idea how much it sucks trying to hold in a huge deposit of stomach rumbling, bubbly, cornhole burning, ass geyser waste while trying to enjoy yourself sexually? You never know when the urge will strike, and sometimes it's too late to stop at a store. Sometimes a store with a restroom isn't an option.

If I do a courtesy flush is that cool?

Nope... You're fired.

[universalenergy]

You come to my house and need to use the toilet and I say no. #2. Would that be odd? I would not come back. I have asked other providers about this issue and they said it is stupid for anybody to have an issue with somebody needing to use the toilet. If they have an issue with that that person has the problem and I would not ever come back.

[Valerie]

Originally Posted by universalenergy

You come to my house and need to use the toilet and I say no. #2. Would that be odd? I would not come back. I have asked other providers about this issue and they said it is stupid for anybody to have an issue with somebody needing to use the toilet. If they have an issue with that that person has the problem and I would not ever come back.

Looks like providers where you live and providers where I live have different standards of what we deem acceptable in bookings...

[enderwiggin]

Yeah man. People don't poop in England.

[abeautifulsite]

lol . I started laughing when I read this one lol. Thank you for saying it. After I read the other one that the hobbyist put up before I believe it is only fair lol

Originally Posted by Valerie

(Well my version of polite & all in good fun of course)

So having just read the other thread for the ladies, I thought I'd make one for all you cheeky bastards

1. Sort your breath out- Gum, mouth rinse, tic tac, I don't care how you do it, but don't come round trying to give us a kiss if you breath smells like something died in it. ( That big fuck off bottle of Listerine in the bathroom isn't there for decoration, use it!)

2. Take a shower- Unless you've just stepped out of the shower right before your booking, take a fucking shower when you arrive. No one wants to smell your sweaty ass, showers don't take long so just do it. I'm not minging, nor should you be.

3. Don't use all my towels- This is one of my personal pet peeves, don't use 4-5 wash cloths/towels please. A towel for after you've showered, fine. A towel to wipe your hands after you've washed them, fine, but don't take the piss. There should be no reason why 4-5 of my towels should be wasted on one person unless you're just a fucking idiot.

4. Don't bang on the door loudly- Discretion is important, so when you arrive at the hotel, there is no need to knock like you're a copper who's coming to get me. A gentle tap will suffice.

5. Cut your fucking fingernails- If you're a fan of finger banging, you better keep those bad boys trimmed all the way down, otherwise don't even think about putting them anywhere near my cunt.

6. Shave/trim your bollocks!- (This really only pertains to those who enjoy being rimmed or having their balls licked) If you think I'm going to go anywhere near that area with my tongue when you look like a fucking gorilla down there, then you're having a laugh.

7. Don't take shit at my incall- If you do, fuck you, you're fired.

8. Don't ask how many others I've seen- It's none of your business. When you arrive at my incall you will not see any indicators that others were there before you, so don't bother asking unless you just fancy getting yelled at.

9. Don't ask me for specific details of where about my incall is- I will make sure you have all the info you need in an appropriate time frame before our date, so don't even think about asking me what hotel I'm going to be staying at a week before.

10. Personal details- If I don't choose to share info about my personal life with you, then don't ask me a bunch of detailed questions about it, it's not your business.

If I think of more I'll be sure to add them

[futile]

Originally Posted by mr666

So about number 6.

What is acceptable trim length? The little hair on the testicles are gone as well as the hair on the actual human horn. I'm talking about the base right now.

How a man shave his own balls? Everytime I tried with trimmer. I ended up getting hurt So I just pull them out which is not fun either.